Ex's new partner changing her name after 4 months

[Steffani87]

So my ex husband and I have been separated since January and two weeks after separated he announced he was seeing someone a week later she met my children without me being informed after asking to be, to support the children. After a month of knowing eachother they got engaged. He has now moved in with her and paid for her to change her surname to his.
Is this normal? After only 4 months of knowing eachother she calls him her husband and yet while doing the financial disclosure for our divorce he has no declared them moving in or them getting engaged nothing on his form it is like she doesn't exist.
I just wondered if this was normal behaviour or a scorned man or if this is just as crazy as I think it is

He was ripped off, you don't need a deed poll and you don't need to pay.

Anyway it's up to them.

The deed poll is just a mechanism to tell the passport office, DVLA, bank, doctor, etc that this is your new name. Once they have processed it, your name is changed in those places. Last I checked they recognise the usual kind of deed poll.

In England, there is no single official place where your "legal name" is recorded. We don't have a national ID system. It's up to individuals to ensure their names match on all paperwork (or to live with the inconvenience if they don't).

When the Government website talks about the enrolled deed poll "putting your name on public record", it was never "on public record" in that sense in the first place. It just means an announcement gets printed somewhere that nobody will ever read. I've only seen it used in the past by people who want to tell high society that Tarquin Featherstone-Smythe is now to be known as Tarquin Featherstone-Forster-Smythe. It's not the go-to place for women taking their partner's surname etc.

Fair enough.

Thats really weird and unlikely to end well for anyone, I think just be there for your kids in case they get attached to her, she will most likely be love bombing them.

"I don't stalk her but friends tell me,"

Why on earth are your friends keeping tabs on them?! You all need to move on with your lives.

Yeah it's crazy but so what. Let her call herself Minnie Mouse if she wants lol.

Its completely free.

I guess if they move in the same circles or the friends are still connected via social media....

He probably has had her on the go before you guys split, either that or he works faaaaast 😂

I would just ignore unless it directly involves the kids. I wouldn’t be happy about my kids meeting someone new so fast in all honesty!

Your ex moving on so fast after your split must have been a big shock and might have you questionning whether your relationship meant anything to him at all also?

Emotions understandably run high in divorce.

It can be tough when the person we thought we knew so well no longer behaves how we expect. But your ex is single now so although hard to accept, its up to him what he does.

It can be really tough going through the whole divorce process and you can feel at times like you never really knew your ex. The realisation can also hit that things are way more out of your control than you anticipated. I wonder if this might be what is going on for you? Maybe focus on what you can control here.

Are you not on any social media?

I am, and lots of the people I know use a nickname on sm, or a middle name, or no surname etc.

Hahahah changing your name imagine. How utterly cringeworthy.

No it’s not normal. Nothing you can do about it though, other than wait for the dust to settle.

Exactly, they're to be laughed at. "Oh I know, I'll change my name to my boyfriend of 4 months surname" 😂

Focus on the financials and be tactical. Does it help or hurt your financial case for him to be cohabiting? If she’s earning, owns her home and financially contributing to his household it helps. If she’s a house’wife’ and dependent on him or pregnant or has her own dc it’s probably better to let him hide her existence. Is there other stuff he’s lying about and so it would help to expose this lie for your financial claim? You can ask info in the questionnaire about her eg income, if he’s paid for her to change her name, if they are cohabiting but only do this if it’s in your interests. I agree it’s weird for her to want to change her name.