Is this enough child maintenance?

[MummyofoneT]

Hi I hope I'm posting this in a suitable place! am looking for some opinions please. I separated from my daughter's dad last year. He is a much higher earner than me, works full time. I work 30 hours a week and already struggle with that due to a couple of slipped discs so really can't increase.

Her dad works nights so she sleeps with me 5 nights of the week, but we split the time she is actually awake 50/50 if that makes sense. So it's tricky to know what is fair in terms of child maintenance.The child maintenance calculator only works on how many nights the child spends with each parent so it works out at about £380 a month. He's only offered to pay me £200 which I am struggling on. Do you think that is fair as he has her half the time she is awake or do you think I have grounds to go to the CMS and ask for more?

You could go through CMS and get a little bit more but then he may expect you to buy everything she needs using this money as he’s pissed off you went down that route or you could stick with what he pays and make sure you’re asking for 50% towards everything extra like school trips, new shoes etc as and when it needs paying for.

@Spirallingdownwards why? On the basis their take home is very similar and actually share pretty much 50:50 of swags hours including feeding and share costs of clothes and transport etc why is it nonsense?

They aren't doing 50/50 though. They are doing 5/2 per week so he will owe child maintenance based on overnight stays because that is the basis on which maintenance is calculated.

If you’re doing 50/50 and splitting costs 50/50 then he wouldn’t owe anything. The nights issue is complicating it and legally you could claim £380 a month but it would seem entirely unfair. £200 is generous as it’s not a supplement to your income it’s his share of child costs. And you say he’s already paying half!

Why is it nonsense.
he’s doing 50/50 of waking hours and 50/50 of other costs + offering £200.
the purpose of cm is for the NRP’s to make up their half of the child costs, he’s already doing that and more.

And is calculated on the basis of overnight stays which in this case is not 50/50. HTH

It is because it makes the mistake of assuming the nights means he’s not having sc and paying 50/50. They don’t know the full facts, OP does.

In the case he pays the full figure that is calculated he is more than entitled to reduce his hours or contribution to costs accordingly. And OP would then be no better off.

He does not have 50/50 though. He dumps the responsibility back on the OP. She is entitled to more. Or he should take on full 50/50 responsibility. She is the one available overnight for the child (even if they are sleeping) and he isn't. He needs to take proper 50/50 or pay because he doesn't the same way he would need to pay for childcare if he has proper 50/50 which would be far more than the difference in maintenance.

He’s baring 50% of costs . op isn’t paying childcare either and isn’t incurring costs while sleeping ( aside from heating etc which he’s already contributing)

sure, go to cms, get your extra cms and watch everything else stop.

good idea. Op can stop doing the extra nights and father can make other arrangements, then there will be no CM payable at all l and OP will still be worse of.
the child is not costing an extra £380 a month while they’re asleep

Thank you for all your responses.Just to add we don't have an agreement about uniform, shoes, clothes etc as he refuses to do mediation. So all I can really do is ask him next time she needs something and guess I'll have to see if he will pay half or get arsey and say I have to pay it out of what he has given me. He does buy her some clothes but just uses the uniform I bought for her, so it's a grey area really. He's a nightmare to deal with as in he will be disrespectful one minute then ask me if he can come over, presumably for a shag....so the less I have to speak to him the better!.

I do hear all your points though, I'm worried if I go down the CMS route it will piss him off and I could end up with less and he would be even more difficult to deal with. I may just have to manage for the sake of my mental health..

@DaisyChain505 I think that is a good point, if I can keep him kind of on side then perhaps he will be more likely to pay half of things. She's having packed lunch at the moment and not really doing many school trips but as she gets older obviously things are going to increase.

Fair point though!

sure, go to cms, get your extra cms and watch everything else stop.

This! Once the CMS have calculated a figure, there is no obligation on the paying parent to pay for anything else.

Bear in mind that if you go down the CMS route things will get difficult very quickly. CMS would be all he’d need to pay, so all costs would be on you.