I'm really considering being a single parent, but I can't tell if things will get better and I will screw us all over? Can you give me your perspective?
The issue is financially I am very dependent until the kids (2 under 2) get older. I have started work part time but it isn't enough to keep us afloat.
He was a dream with our first, but it's going downhill rapidly and he isn't who I married.
I do all day, all night with the kids, the house, everything and go to work completely dead.
He is becoming so grumpy and always swearing. I leave him to have a shower and by the time I'm downstairs chaos has ensued and he is in a mood and swearing. Even when he says I can rest, I have an ear out incase I need to intervene. I have tried to communicate, I've even written it down for him, my boundaries, not to shout at the kids..he generally denies it or says I'm just sensitive.
Am I being too precious? I know a lot of people can shout or swear. So is the swearing and moods not a good enough reason?
I think I just feel that as his moods are escalating that as children get more challenging it will only get worse and I think I see it as a red flag..mainly the denial of it and passing it off as ok. That it only takes one time to lose it and something happen..
He always acts hard done by..me and the youngest sleep on a sofa bed permanently he can't cope on it 🙄 I asked one night in a bed and he says it's your choice to be on the sofa. I guess he always turns everything onto someone else.
He got caught speeding the other day and he managed to turn that into being the police fault for being there...he doesn't seem bothered by it at all
He has a DRO (I bailed him out of some debt but it was too much) and I said that it will effect renting ect but he always has to be right and is adamant that it won't effect him at all. I guess the complete denial of reality so he can be right is driving me mad. There is a lot more that I feel he jeopardised us all just to be "right" that to me is serious but to him nothing, I don't want to waffle on.
I'm not easy either though, I am highly strung and meticulous with being organised. I risk assess everything and overthink.
So maybe we are so opposite we aren't compatible? I'm sure he would find many other faults in me. I'm trying to see my part in this.
Basically am i wrong to divorce in the thick of it? Am I overreacting and blind to my faults?
Would I even manage on my own or end up in complete poverty and kids suffer?