STBX reducing his income by 80% before completing Form E

[Tex111]

Have been waiting three months for STBX to complete his Form E. Now learned that he's changing jobs and reducing his income by almost 80% (£400,000 to £90,000). I was a SAHM for over twenty years and can't support myself yet. I've started a new career that takes time to build and have been applying for jobs but getting nowhere.

I'm slightly freaking out as I feel so helpless. My solicitors think this is a calculated ploy on STBX's part to reduce my settlement and say I should take him to court. We've got two kids at uni. Anyone else been through something similar? What did you do?

We sold the family home in '22 and I have a small flat that's less than half the size of the previous house, but I have bedrooms for both kids. DD lives with me. I don't want to lose this flat. It's home now. The kids and I both need this stability. I'm also near my support network in London and would struggle without them if I had to move somewhere cheaper.

I think STBX is trying to punish me for something even though he caused the split. Feeling so anxious about it all.

[brocollilover]

he will lose out massively financially

if all true… talk about cutting his nose off

doesn't make sense unless you were going to get more £310k cms a year, which is j likely 😆

[brocollilover]

and op your maths is. out


it’s not 80%

[brocollilover]

how old is he?

[Soontobe60]

@brocollilover

and op your maths is. out


it’s not 80%

It’s not far off.

[Luckydog7]

@brocollilover

he will lose out massively financially

if all true… talk about cutting his nose off

doesn't make sense unless you were going to get more £310k cms a year, which is j likely 😆

He only needs to do it until the financial order is completed then presumably could just got back/get another high paid job again.

It doesn't really matter why. If it's been done deliberately then yes you need to go to court. Can you get/do you have evidence that he's done it deliberately?

[brocollilover]

@Soontobe60

It’s not far off.

£400k
reduced to
£90k

is reducing by over £300k more than 80%

[brocollilover]

@Luckydog7

He only needs to do it until the financial order is completed then presumably could just got back/get another high paid job again.

It doesn't really matter why. If it's been done deliberately then yes you need to go to court. Can you get/do you have evidence that he's done it deliberately?

then the solicitor includes the condition (can’t remember the term) something variation blah blah

but basically means can be revisited

happened in my divorce.

[MrsTerryPratchett]

If you had a big house which you sold, and he's been earning 400K, surely you have savings and pensions. I would focus on those because with the kids at university, CMS won't be for very long.

I will admit I find 'SAHM' to two children at university a little disingenuous. That's my stuff though.

[Luckydog7]

@brocollilover

£400k
reduced to
£90k

is reducing by over £300k more than 80%

Edited

Deleted

[Tex111]

He's 55. When I did my Form E, I thought I would need about £70,000 a year to start, reducing it as my income increased. He is the type of person who would be vindictive to his own detriment, but we do have a chunk of savings (about £175,000) and I wonder if he thinks he'll use that.

He doesn't communicate with his own solicitor and when I texted to say that the new salary doesn't seem feasible at the moment, he said I would have to just make adjustments.

I said 'almost 80%', which is true.

[brocollilover]

@Luckydog7

Deleted

Edited

apologies
my bad

[MooseBeTimeForSnow]

I’d be looking for a nominal spousal
maintenance order of £1 a year. That would keep your options open if he went back to the old job (or similar).

[zurg123]

Never been in this situation but if your dc are adults, what support are you looking for from your ex? Do you have a mortgage on your home?

[brocollilover]

@Tex111

He's 55. When I did my Form E, I thought I would need about £70,000 a year to start, reducing it as my income increased. He is the type of person who would be vindictive to his own detriment, but we do have a chunk of savings (about £175,000) and I wonder if he thinks he'll use that.

He doesn't communicate with his own solicitor and when I texted to say that the new salary doesn't seem feasible at the moment, he said I would have to just make adjustments.

I said 'almost 80%', which is true.

op there’s been vindictive

and then there’s losing out on £310k to “save” yourself far far FAR less than that in maintenance

in any event… both children are at uni!

i reckon he’s taken a step back and planning early retirement. normal at that age in very. try senior roles

has he gone from CEO to consultant?

[Tex111]

I'm not sure how I could prove he's doing it deliberately.

I do have a job, it's just very low paying at the moment but I've doubled the income in the last year. Still only about £12,000 a year though.

[DeedlessIndeed]

OP, apologies I don't understand. What is the £70K to cover mentioned in Form E?

[brocollilover]

@Tex111

I'm not sure how I could prove he's doing it deliberately.

I do have a job, it's just very low paying at the moment but I've doubled the income in the last year. Still only about £12,000 a year though.

you can’t

why

because it makes bugger all sense when if you’re thinking is right…. he would lose hundreds of thousands to save a fraction of that on very small support for uni aged kids!!

[brocollilover]

he’s 55
single
very wealthy

he wants to take his foot off the accelerator and start enjoying the fruits of his labour

he won’t go back and he’s not doing this to spite you out of money for a year or so when he would lose out many many many multiples of that

[KnickerlessParsons]

£70000 is a lot to give you when both your kids are at uni. Is there any reason you can't support yourself? £12,000 per year is less than min wage assuming you work full time.

[brocollilover]

when you say you’ve started a new career and you’re looking for jobs…. are you currently employed?

[Tex111]

The £70k is to cover expenses for myself, DD (who is finishing school and will go to uni after a gap) and DS (who is at uni now). ExH always said he would pay for their undergrad degrees so they would start out with debt, which would be easy to do on his current salary but impossible with the reduction.

I know that amount sounds enormous and I'm aware of the privilege, but it has been the norm for us for decades. I've hugely reduced my expenses since separating, and was happy to, but I don't want to be worrying about making ends meet as I get older. I don't have a pension but will ask for half of ExH's which will give me about £150,000 in the pension pot. He's very good at earning, but hasn't been great at saving or investing.

[Mrsttcno1]

Not sure how else to say this OP but you were never going to get £70k a year from him once you’re divorced anyway. He has a continued responsibility to pay CMS (depending on the age of the kids), but he would never have been asked to pay you any kind of “salary” and certainly not to the tune of 70k when there is no reason you cannot go out and earn a wage yourself- your kids are in uni, not nursery. No court was ever going to make him hand you over 70k a year.

[brocollilover]

£400k salary and only £300k pension at 55? he should have loads more than that!

op…. what does your solicitor think you’re entitled to? they have the full picture we don’t

[brocollilover]

i imagine he will be communicating directly with this children OP regarding finance’s relating to them

[DreadPirateRobots]

Bloody hell. I do have to wonder what you've been doing. No pension for you, very little for him considering what he's been earning, you're working very PT despite adult DC... Were you not conscious that as a couple, you had very poor financial planning?