Stuck in Joint Tenancy

[KeepSmiling89]

https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/relationships/4674082-trying-to-leave

Stuck in a really S*y position. I left my ex mid-February and have been staying at my mum's house with my now 18 month old DD. We have a shared care arrangement in place until he gets himself sorted with a job (NOT going to happen as he's just waiting for UC and doesn't want to work, just wants to be a full time SAHD). When I'm at work, my mum looks after DD.
The s*y position I'm in is that we were living in a privately rented house under a joint tenancy agreement. Under this contract, the only way to end the tenancy is for BOTH tenants to give written notice to terminate the lease. I can't do this on my own. He wants to stay in the house, but is waiting on his UC application coming through so he knows what money he'll be getting etc. Basically, I'm paying full rent and bills for a house I'm no longer living in! As far as I know, the only thing he's sorted is council tax as that direct debit didn't come off our joint account this month. I've also recently cancelled our Sky subscription and TV licence. The rent is £600 a month and utilities are about £350 (thanks to increase in energy prices!) so it's a LOT of money when I could be saving that for a house of my own for me and DD!
I contacted the letting agents to see what I could do to take my name off the lease etc, but they're tied by law as we have to end this joint tenancy and ex has to apply for a new single tenancy when the joint one is terminated.
He said he has an appointment at the job centre at the end of this month so he thinks he's going to find out how much UC he'll be getting (don't think he realises that this isn't what the appointment is about and it'll probably be about his plans to look for work when DD is a bit older...I don't know, but I'm pretty sure that's more realistic!)

Don't know why I'm posting...just wondering if anyone has been in a similar situation...do I just have to wait this out or is there anything I can do? I've spoken to a solicitor who suggested giving my notice to end the tenancy so when ex does the same, that's it sorted, but I've done that and we both need to give notice at the same time so they can't accept my written notice yet and ex won't give notice until he's got his UC.
Just so FED UP!

@AP5Diva the problem is that he's not going to agree to end the tenancy until his universal credit comes through.

I think he is taking the piss with the UC as well, I am sure from the time I put in a claim to actually getting the money was 6 weeks, and in that time I got the advance as well, maybe it was because I was transferring, but I had to close down one claim and open a new one.

I would not believe a word he says, if you look at one of the benefit websites, to see what he might get, tell him and give him x amount of time (maybe a month).

I wouldnt normally say to do any of this, but I really think he is taking the piss and the more information you have the better equip you are to tell him to fuck off and sort his life out and pay his own bills

@sobeyondthehills I agree...even my solicitor said it only takes about 6 weeks. He didn't submit his claim until a fair while after I'd left, but, even then, it should've been processed by now. He said he's got a meeting with the job centre later this week and is hoping to find out how much he'll get, but I'm not sure if that's what the meeting is actually about. Who knows?!

Ffs what an arsehole. He must think he owns you and that you are his pet he just can bark orders at. Wank

@twoandcooplease and that's over 4 months AFTER I left him!

Have you contacted Shelter? Their website says that one tenant CAN end a joint tenancy if you are out of the fixed period which you say you are.

Why are you waiting for him? Get proper advice and rid yourself of this pathetic excuse for a human being.

https://england.shelter.org.uk/professionalresources/legal/renting/introductionntosecurityyoftenure/jointttenancies?its=JTdCJTIydmlkJTIyJTNBJTIyNDIxY2RjOGItZThhZS00YTVhLWI0ZTUtZjlkMDZjNTg3YTkwJTIyJTJDJTIyc3RhdGUlMjIlM0ElMjJybHR%2BMTY4Nzg5Mzk3NX5sYW5kfjJfODUxOTlfc2VvX2I2OTAxYmQ3NzhlNGIwNGRiNjQ2Y2VjNTczN2RmOTM0JTIyJTJDJTIyc2l0ZUlkJTIyJTNBMTE5NzglN0Q%3D#title-2

Sorry, just saw you're in Scotland!

Wooooow! I can’t believe how manipulative he is! I’m actually shocked. You stood up for yourself and he’s telling you to face the consequences of your actions, he really feels like he has full control over you doesn’t he.

Personally, I would email the letting agent and tell him I am moving out and I will not be paying rent any more. It’s not optional and it’s not happening.

He can either rewrite the tenancy with your ex or pay to get you evicted, however, you’re not in the property anyway so I’m unsure what that would achieve.

Just stop paying.

Have you asked your landlord to change to a single tenancy? This is the recommended step if one member of a joint T wants to leave

Sorry. Just realised why he can't be the single tenant at present.

Maybe have a chat with the landlord /agent and ask them to give you notice? They'd be more willing to do that then have you stop paying!

Stop all the messing about. If you cannot get out of the tenancy then tell him you are moving back in. He definitely wont like that and may force him into agreeing, as pp said he will be better off for UC in a single tenancy as you have to provide your tenancy info for housing element of UC before they award it.

Alternatively, and the option I would take, cut him off. Close the utility accounts, stop paying his mobile bill, and tell the giant manchild to sort himself out. Advise the letting agent that you will not be paying anymore rent after the date your contract ties you too and that he is the only one living in the property.
Im quite harsh so I'd probably also be letting the Job Centre know that he isnt looking after his child as they are with you and that your mum is doing it.
He would def know regarding UC by now. You can very easily apply online and see everything that way. I do all mine via my phone. Piece of cake.

UPDATE
Friday is looking like the day I can finally take steps towards saving for a deposit for my own place! FINALLY!!
ExH's UC application has gone through and he's supposed to be getting his first full payment on Friday. He received half of it just over a week ago and was told he would get the other half 2 weeks later, but he got in touch with them and requested it all be paid in 1 so he can pay the bills. He ain't gonna have much left over, but that's not my problem anymore!
Also found out from another lettings manager that, if I'm happy for the deposit (£600) to be paid back in full to my Ex to go towards the deposit for the house as a single tenancy, and put this in writing, they'll go to the landlord to ask if he'll be willing to just take on Ex as a single tenant. Would cost us an extra £150 to set up the new tenancy, but I don't really care anymore to be honest! I just want my freedom!

Also, had a mediation appointment arranged for tomorrow after work, which has now been cancelled - actually quite relieved as I've been told that mediation can't work if there's a history of domestic abuse or if one person is abusive....I dunno...meh.

Oh, also, I know he's telling me the truth about UC as he showed me the screenshot of his phone with how much he was getting when he got the 'half payment'

Just thought I'd update as today, instead of £600 leaving my account to pay for a property I no longer live in, it's going into my own personal savings account as I'm now off the tenancy and no longer liable for rent payments - WOOHOOO!!!!!!

Brilliant news!

Hurrah 🥳

So good to have your update.

Good luck for the future. Keep your eye on your goals and let no man ever take away your freedom again. Keep that drawbridge up. Well done & well done to your Mam who no doubt has been quietly supporting you through all this nonsense.

Yay, great news!

Even more good news today!
Pay day was yesterday so I was able to put a nice big chunk of my wages into my savings account, which will go towards the deposit for my own place (eek!)

Also checked my account earlier today and looks like HMRC have decided it's me who'll receive child benefit for DD so I've received backdated payments for the last 5/6 months! That'll be going straight into DD's own savings account.

Exciting times!

That's brilliant news @KeepSmiling89