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Divorce/separation

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Original poster

WWYD? Two separate but awful properties

49 replies

itsmehiimtheproblemitssme · 02/03/2023 13:45

I'm newly separated and I've been offered two diff properties with the council.
One is a semi detached house in a really rough area, the house is ok at best (spacious but living room flooring needs replacing). Also the garden is an absolute mess, it's just mud mixed with weeds, no fencing, full of litter from neighbours and apparently has an ongoing pest problem (lovely).
The other is a flat. The flat is top floor, it's absolutely gorgeous inside and needs no work, it's in a rough but not as rough area...the catch is the block looks awful from the outside. Think soviet union style block of flats...and I would take it in a heartbeat but worried my son will be ashamed to live there for the next few years. (Although tbf, the block doesn't have a reputation and seems quite quiet). He's only 1 right now...I have started saving for a mortgage as private renting is so insanely overpriced... obviously not there yet with savings but I'm gonna need to find somewhere I can at least be comfortable for the next few years.
WWYD?

OP posts:
WhyIsBogdanSexy · 02/03/2023 13:48

Your DS is one? Normally I'd say garden for that age but the garden of the semi sounds pretty bad so I'd go with the flat and save instead of spending on the flooring and garden.

Don't give a second thought to being embarrassed about how it looks from the outside. You said it's lovely inside, and when it has yours and your son's things it will be your home and your safe space. He will love being there with his mummy, that's all he needs.

Good luck with your new home.

superking · 02/03/2023 13:49

Definitely take the flat. Having a garden would be nice, and and doing the work to the house wouldn't put me off, but a rough area, littering neighbours and a pest problem definitely would! I wouldn't think twice about the outside of the flat and in my experience kids up to at least the age of 10 don't even notice (or at least don't make any judgement on) how a house/ block of flats looks from the outside.

hedgehoglurker · 02/03/2023 14:03

Would it be an option to choose the house, with a view to swapping at a later stage? I would have thought that many families would be so desperate for a house with the space garden that they would overlook its problems.

How far up is the top floor flat?

Do both have good transport links and local amenities?

TheHomeEdit · 02/03/2023 14:43

Have you seen what the Barbican looks like from the outside - and those flats are £1,000,000 and up. If the inside is lovely go for it.

It sounds like you probably don’t have the time or money to sort the garden at the moment, so although a garden might be ideal, a rat infested rubbish filled patch wouldn’t get any use.

Aquamarine1029 · 02/03/2023 14:50

The flat. Definitely.

WinterMusings · 02/03/2023 14:55

The flat! Sounds safer & nicer inside.

The other ones sounds like a nightmare!!

Your DS is years & years away from giving a toss what the outside of the block looks like!!

Safety is the most important thing!!

Throwncrumbs · 02/03/2023 15:04

The house….so much more bargaining power if you want to swap, plus you can do it up and decide to stay if the time comes and you don’t think you can afford a mortgage.

Original poster
itsmehiimtheproblemitssme · 02/03/2023 15:06

Thank you all for your responses.
I am 100 percent leaning towards the flat. As much as I'd love a garden, it's going to cost thousands and I'd really rather save that money if I can.
I have about £1.3k saved up but if I can use that towards a mortgage in time then even better.
And yes, I could swap the house after a year I believe but honestly the area has a horrific reputation so I can't see it happening...x

OP posts:
Bunnyishotandcross · 02/03/2023 15:07

The house.. Imagine how stressed you would feel about dc annoying the block with teething. And noise keeping him awake also! And lugging dc /pram /shopping up every day. Been there. Done that.

Original poster
itsmehiimtheproblemitssme · 02/03/2023 15:07

Sorry, to clarify I mean it'll cost thousands to get it into a safe space...fencing, replacing the soil etc. Even then with rats, it would give me too much anxiety to even go out there to be honest.

OP posts:
itsmeimtheproblem · 02/03/2023 15:09

Nice username ;) how many flats are in the block? what level is top floor? is there much difference in rent/council tax? I suggest going around both properties late at night on the weekend to give you a feel of the place

Original poster
itsmehiimtheproblemitssme · 02/03/2023 15:11

Bunnyishotandcross · 02/03/2023 15:07

The house.. Imagine how stressed you would feel about dc annoying the block with teething. And noise keeping him awake also! And lugging dc /pram /shopping up every day. Been there. Done that.

That is very true. I know nothing about the neighbours in the flats. It is a two story flat though with stairs so it's like a home inside a block, so not sure if noise would travel as much (bedrooms are on the top floor).
I'm also worried about it being so high up...there's safety locks etc on the windows, either way there's negatives with both of these properties and it's tough to decide.

OP posts:
itsmeimtheproblem · 02/03/2023 15:13

Also look at the EPC rating on both properties. Which building is "newer"

GenerallyGreenerGrass · 02/03/2023 15:16

Definitely take the least rough area…..

Original poster
itsmehiimtheproblemitssme · 02/03/2023 15:22

itsmeimtheproblem · 02/03/2023 15:13

Also look at the EPC rating on both properties. Which building is "newer"

Nice username. Lol
I have just looked and they're both D rated. I know the house was built in the 50's, I only know this because I have been warned about the asbestos inside a few walls.
I have no idea about the flats.

OP posts:
LookingOldTheseDays · 02/03/2023 15:23

The flat, no question about it.

ToBeOrNotToBee · 02/03/2023 15:23

The house.

You can mutual exchange out of there; but you've got no chance of exchanging from a block with no garden.

Original poster
itsmehiimtheproblemitssme · 02/03/2023 15:24

itsmehiimtheproblemitssme · 02/03/2023 15:22

Nice username. Lol
I have just looked and they're both D rated. I know the house was built in the 50's, I only know this because I have been warned about the asbestos inside a few walls.
I have no idea about the flats.

Show quote history

Sorry...baby brain...I didn't even explain myself at all there. Apparently asbestos was only used when certain houses on the estate were built in the 50s, including the one I've been offered.

OP posts:
Original poster
itsmehiimtheproblemitssme · 02/03/2023 15:28

itsmeimtheproblem · 02/03/2023 15:09

Nice username ;) how many flats are in the block? what level is top floor? is there much difference in rent/council tax? I suggest going around both properties late at night on the weekend to give you a feel of the place

Ah I didn't see this comment you made first 😂
It's the 3/4th floor (it's a two story flat), rent is roughly the same (£8 difference).
I've been to the area with the house late at night and it's absolutely mental. Motorbikes constantly up and down the road, kids hanging around. Seems ok in the day though.
The flat is on a road with two other blocks of flats and a row of pretty nice looking bungalows. I haven't been at night so I might scope it out later as I have the night to myself...

OP posts:
Minikievs · 02/03/2023 15:32

I'd 100% choose the flat
I moved a couple of years ago, my house is REALLY UGLY from the outside. It's beautiful inside. When you're sat inside, you don't see the outside of it Wink
Plus the area your house option is in sounds awful. Best of luck with your move Flowers

howmanybicycles · 02/03/2023 15:40

Definitely the flat. Ugly doesn't matter. Home is what matters.

Beamur · 02/03/2023 15:40

Flat sounds loads better but definitely check out the area at night.
Your son is years off judging where you live. I grew up in a high rise flat and then on a council estate. My memories are of the good things about my childhood - kids don't have that kind of perspective until school years at the very earliest and may never feel bothered by it!

minford · 02/03/2023 15:40

Flat definitely. You don't want to choose an awful area and stressful neighbours. I would find that stressful being solely responsible if the area didn't feel safe and there are lots of people and bikes 'hanging about' as you say. The house sounds noisy and too obviously problematic.

purplecorkheart · 02/03/2023 15:45

The flat would be my choice. Your son is not going to care what the building looks outside

minford · 02/03/2023 15:58

I think it's fine to give yourself a few months to plan, judge finances, your work patterns and so on. But not longer. The younger the children are, probably the easier it is to get a new system going and for them to adjust to a new routine before hormones kick in. You can still be amicable and be a few steps ahead if that's what you need - and I understand that - before being so far gone in your thinking that dh will feel totally deceived.

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