Should Cm increase?

[Bemyclementine]

I have 2 dc, 6 and 7, sperated over 5 yrs from their dad. He suggested an amount if CM when he left,which I was happy with. I was on mat leave, essentially 2 babies.

But, the amount hasn't increased, yet my costs have, massively. Cost of living - food, bills, fuel, etc. Also, 2 babies used to go to a baby group for £2 a week and swimming for £4. School uniform, shoes, trainers, wellies- all needed for school . Pe kits, forest school kits, swimming stuff.

Now, I have to pay for after school childcare, (he never, ever does a school tun, never sees thdm in the week) swimming lessons (essential imo) other clubs such as Beavers (not essential but very good to do) football - youngest is obsessed with.

My question is, should I expect cm to go up? His income has very def gone up, as have my child related outgoings.

It was written in to my divorce that at the end of every financial year he emails me his P60. Assumed this was the norm as neither of us requested it. Maybe check the small print? I couldn't care less where he works or what his NI number is.

@BetterFuture1985 your situation is very different to mine.

Cms does not take into account what the child costs to raise.

It is a simple formula based on NRPs income and how many night they have the child.

There isn't an annual increase, but it will increase if NRP earnings have increased.

Probably inserted by a solicitor. I would never sign anything demanding I hand over personal data my ex-wife didn't need.

Where does it say that CM is the legal minimum? I have seen this a lot here but I have never found a legal reference to this.

@taxpayer1 I know right. They all want they're "entitled" to even if it means dad lives in a bed sit. But if they think it should be more it becomes a minimum 😂

Was the amount formally written down?

I think most agreements decide on a % of income - often based on the CMS amount + some or something like that

If he’s self employed I don’t like your chances of getting any kind of increase if you go the CMS route. Your best option would be to try and talk to him about how your basic costs have increased by x% - your food shop, the gas or electricity bill, the cost of childcare - and ask if he’s able to increase the amount he pays as it was agreed 5 years ago.

I hope he’s not one of the arseholes who’ve posted on here.

It is telling OP doesn't want to reveal how much she receives.

It shouldn't matter. If his income has gone up the money he pays to support his kids should go up.

I did think this. Given it's anonymous it doesn't matter

It does matter. For example, if he is a very high earner, CMS doesn't have the power to increase it so she would need to go via courts.

Ah right sorry my bad!

Don't worry. Ignorance is bliss.

It's irrelevant really, to my question of whether it should increase after 5 yrs. But for those desperate to know, its £300 a month.

He has the children 1 day a week, no overnights. Doesn't contribute in any other way (buying school shoes for example).
Never has them overnight. At least, hasn't done since last summer and then it was once. He has no pension and lives with his mum (because he chooses to) never picks up from school, takes to football, doesn't phone, nothing. It's one day a week and that's it (not my doing) No extra times in school holidays or at Christmas.

I work, and always have done

Have you checked on the CMS calculator based on what you assume his earnings are? He's clearly a shit dad, there's no disputing that.

I think the Sex topic has attracted new posters.

@GoodChat I don't know what his earnings are, I do know that he's charging a lot more as his experience has grown, and is always busy he's also taken over from someone running the business .

It was just a question. I won't be going to CMS nor asking him for more.

You see 300 sounds is a low amount. Even two children at minimum wage are 250 pounds so I think you should ask. If he doesn't want to engage, take him to CMS. You don't have much to lose 250 instead of 300.

If his income has doubled then it absolutely should go up. Regardless of how much you get.

Being self employed could make him tricky for CMS depending on how he structured his income - sometimes it’s sadly not worth rocking the boat. Just depends on the character of the man.

That would mean he earns £24,000 a year before tax? Seems unlikely but you'll have a rough idea as you know his field. You could go to cms but he may fiddle his books next year and you may get less.

Is he a rational person generally?

If you tell him you're struggling with school uniform costs, or whatever, would he contribute? Does he buy the children clothes for when they're with him?

@amiold nope. He pays what he wants. It wasnt set by CMS.

It was just a question. I won't be going to CMS nor asking him for more.

If you don't want to ask for the money ask him to pay directly for tangible items e.g. school uniforms, school shoes, paying for sport clubs

It's for your children's sake not yours.

I've worked with men, who are freelance/self-employed, whose ex-partners have asked them to pay for specific things rather than for the money directly.

In fact one guy I worked with had two exs he had children with. The first ex was fair, so when she asked for money he paid it and would ask if it was enough e.g. she would ask him to pay for a school trip and he would ask if the child need spending money on top. The second ex would take the piss so he would actually check whether the amount she asked for was truthful.

@GoodChat no, he is the least rational person I know . I won't tell him I'm struggling, he will find a way to use it against me. And no, he'll buy an expensive toy, or expensive trainers (when they have trainers but really need wellies for example)

And no, no clothes for when they're with him but then he doesn't have them overnight