Newly single after LT relationship: Dating & s3x

[SwipingLeftOrRight]

I’m starting this thread under a changed user name.

Based on this thread www.mumsnet.com/talk/relationships/4648535-anyone-finding-their-feet-after-marriage-ended there’s a few of us dating and dipping our toe into the dating scene so this thread is for those who have separated after a long term marriage or relationship and want to talk all things single life and what comes with that, stories, dilemmas and tips! (as opposed to all things STBEH / exH related!)

Anyone want to share their wisdom?

My back story - separated 4 months ago, heartbroken but moved on (ish) I joined Bumble over the weekend because I’m horny and need sex ASAP and have no idea how to find someone. It feels like free porn as any fit man is turning me on when I’m swiping 🤭 but the other side to it is that I’m royally scared of another man seeing me naked, and kissing my stretch marks!

I’m no use OP but I’ll comment anyway. I’m separated 6 months now. Couldn’t think of anything worse than starting to date again.

Still love my ex and finding it hard to move on although I have moved on in myself if that makes sense.

Sorry to hear @Pleasecreateausername13 being in love is shit isn’t it. I’m not ready to date really, I just need sex. I think there’s an episode of sex and the city where Carrie says “I need the weight of a man on top of me” 😂 that would be good, don’t need the drama or build up to it. The irony is that I was never like this with my ex, so it’s a very different pull/power, I’ve not had before.

@SwipingLeftOrRight

See that’s it for me, I never really enjoyed sex until I met my ex and we had such a connection sex wise.

I think that fundamentally, is why I’m struggling to let go because I don’t think I’ll have that with anyone else.

I separated from my husband after almost 20 years early last year. Our marriage had been dead for many years. Went on a few dates with a number of people which was a nice way to get my confidence back. Did have a very brief thing with a very attractive, younger man which was all about Sex. It was liberating. I'm 40, have 2 kids and the body to prove it, I'm not unattractive but I'm also no supermodel. He didn't care. We had a great connection, the Sex was amazing and he was very complimentary about me.
Ultimately the casual hook up thing wasn't for me but it was great while it lasted (briefly). I've met my current boyfriend shortly afterwards. Really wasn't expecting it, but it's been 7 months and things are amazing. I didn't realise how much I missed the affection and companionship of someone who actually wants to spend time with me.
I am pretty sure you won't be short of offers if a casual hookup or fwb is what you're after.

I’ve been split for two years, divorced since September 2022. The idea of dating fills me with dread although I would love to have sex again (at least once before I die 😁).
I’m nearly 50 and the last time I dated I was 25, full of confidence and bravado. However I do have a friend who I “see” regularly - we both like each other but it’s moving at a total snail’s pace because I’m scared and he’s widowed and scared. I’m sure at some point we will go mad and rip each others’ clothes off but at the moment it’s all we can handle.
I feel lucky with this because it’s always been about companionship and having things in common which I need to be the lifeblood of my relationships.
Just wish we were bold enough to get on with the next step!