Can you save a marriage after infidelity?

[Brummie999]

Has anyone out there made their marriage work after finding out their partner was unfaithful?.
we have been married 15 years, I found out in September that my husband had been involved in a sexual relationship with a woman for four months, he had ended the relationship so she contacted ne and told me all about it.
the truth is our marriage hadn’t been great for at least two years and I thought we were on a slow decline towards divorce however after talking through what had happened and why it had happened we both decided we wanted to work things through (if possible).
however I am struggling with anger/ resentment about the fact my husband sought intimacy with another woman, will the rage eventually subside, is it possible to move on from this or am I just delaying the inevitable divorce.
we have children and I’m keep to really try for all of our benefit to fix this.

These ups and downs are all part of the aftermath of a trauma.

It doesn't mean you were wrong to try. It's too soon to predict whether your future is together or separate.

A year is probably a realistic time frame....because you both will change because of this experience and the relationship needs to evolve or end...the former takes time.

Try to enjoy the good days and weeks without thinking the journey is over. Try not to let bad days make you devoid of hope.

Time will tell. A decision isn't better for having been made in a hurry so take your time.

Resentment can last a lifetime and hit you at any time. It's hard but can be done. I wish it had never happened and I feel I never really forgave him.

Actually like can move on and you can live a happily ever after. I truly believe that. If you allow yourself to separate from his actions and just focus on your own.

I think he will almost certainly have minimised things as they almost always do.

it’s ok to feel the way you do. I have noticed you have been quick to apportion some blame to yourself in this but reading your thread it seems like it was him that started the process and you just pulled away due to the rejection.

You mention that you felt you were heading for divorce for up to 2 years prior to that. How did you feel about that before the affair came to light?