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Divorce/separation

Here you'll find divorce help and support from other Mners. For legal advice, you may find Advice Now guides useful.

When did you know it was time to separate?

34 replies

LittleTwiglet · 20/02/2022 17:03

I'm just trying to figure things out at the moment, beside the fact I am increasingly unhappy and the tension for the most part unbearable with next to no communication.

When did you finally realise it was time to leave? How did you do it?

OP posts:
SewingBees · 20/02/2022 17:36

We're just starting to separate so I can't answer your last question, but I knew it was time to start the process when my husband made it clear that he wasn't prepared to meet any of my (very reasonable) requests for changes in his behaviour - I asked that he make time for us to do things together and he said no, not even an occasional trip to the cinema.

Bumblebray · 20/02/2022 22:56

I knew it was time to separate when I realised how much I was neglecting myself for someone who didn’t do anything for me nor for himself. When it’s all take take take and no give. Marriage is 50/50, if it doesn’t feel like that, then what’s the point?

SunnydaleHSAlumna · 20/02/2022 23:06

I’m at a similar point as you I think OP. Trying to decide if it’s definitely something I want to do. It has been a slow pile up and it’s just been one small thing after another that are tipping the scales.

LittleTwiglet · 21/02/2022 08:47

It's hard to figure out all the pros/cons really, for me, especially with two little children.

OP posts:
SewingBees · 21/02/2022 09:52

I've only just made the decision to separate in the last two months, similar to PP it felt like I was getting nothing from the relationship.

I saw a counsellor and it really helped me to see my situation more clearly and to make my decision, and it's also helping me through the process.

LittleTwiglet · 21/02/2022 17:16

Was that a private counsellor? Like therapy or relationship specific? I think this may be a good route for me to go, as I feel much the same, I and the children, get barely anything from him, and I keep thinking it can't be having a good affect on them, but then there's all the arrangements and decisions that come with splitting up that I just can't get my around.

OP posts:
penguinfacebum · 21/02/2022 18:44

Hiya. I just decided 4 weeks ago. Years of ups and downs (15 years married). Discussed the issues a few times over the years. Always both said we wanted to make it better. Neither of us really made any changes. It just goes through the same cycle time and time again. No intimacy, no connection, separate lives around the kids and their needs. I was never brave enough because of the kids, and then suddenly, boom, something clicked and I just couldn't carry on with things. It's a shit show currently. But I know it is the right decision. I think that deep down, you just know when things are done. It is just waiting for the right time.....

SewingBees · 21/02/2022 19:22

OP my counselling is privately arranged and just for me (ie not couples therapy). It has helped me to get things straight in my head around my husband's behaviour and whether it is reasonable or not, also whether it is acceptable to me or not, which I'd never thought about before but are two different things. Counselling has given me the space to talk purely about my issues without judgement or interruption. One really important thing is that my counsellor has helped me with my guilty feelings about leaving a man who is unwell, and helped me accept that my husband is making choices too that are leading to our separation.

SewingBees · 21/02/2022 19:39

Aaargh, lost my reply! OP my counselling is private, not couples therapy. It has helped me to get a lot of things straight that were very muddled in my head. The biggest things I've got from it are a realisation how much I've compromised to keep the relationship going, and how little my husband has, and how utterly unhappy it is making me. That although my husband is ill (depression) that's not an excuse for him not making any effort but expecting me to. That my feelings are valid and I have a right to be happy. That the only person I need to justify my decisions to are myself.

My counsellor is male which is also really helpful for me because when he highlights poor behaviour on my husband's part there's no gender bias.

LittleTwiglet · 21/02/2022 21:12

We have been together 10 years, now with two little children (not yet at school), and everything child/house related is done exclusively by me, even on the days he has off work. There is next to no intimacy anymore, not even a kiss hello/goodbye, we barely exchange words that can pass as a proper conversation, he wants to be socialising with friends/at work, my main focus is my children and trying to ease my own health (mental and physical). I have said on so many occasions we are clearly unhappy, that we don't have a proper conversation, always bickering, etc, but it's no avail. It just falls into the same miserable routine. I'm so conflicted because of my children that I don't know what to do for the best, and have no one I can really talk it over with, my parents do not like him.
How did you find the counselling nervous? Is just a case of googling therapist? If it was just myself I wouldn't think twice about leaving, but I dont want to make the wrong decision for my children.

OP posts:
formalineadeline · 21/02/2022 21:28

but I dont want to make the wrong decision for my children

Ok, it sounds like you're twisting yourself up trying to make a perfect decision (which does not exist), so look at it like this: what is the least bad path?

Staying like this in a stressful atmosphere learning unhealthy behaviours?

Growing up in a relaxed atmosphere learning healthy behaviours?

What's the part that's tripping you up - the media / society narrative that single mothers are raising their children in "broken homes" ?

but then there's all the arrangements and decisions that come with splitting up that I just can't get my around.

You don't have to do it all at once and it would be better not to try - that's what's overwhelming you.

As with anything daunting and complicated, you take it one step and one element at a time. One step then another then another.

It's perfectly manageable taken like that.

Use reliable information sources - you can get good advice on Mumsnet but sometimes people repeat things they wish were true or heard down the pub that are legally or factually incorrect.

Citizens Advice has very good information pages on lots of topics including divorce, child arrangements, finances etc. They are easy to read.

Money Advice Service and Money Saving Expert have reliable financial information.

Entitledto can help you consider where you stand with social security.

If you are looking at therapy, make sure they are qualified and regulated - BACP, HCPC.

You can also search for therapists on Bupa's website, which might give you a sense of things to think about in terms of qualifications and specialisms. Obviously that limits your pool to only those with a contract to Bupa but it could be helpful as a starting point. Other private healthcare providers may have the same available, this is just one I happen to know about.

The usual advice is to interview a few therapists before picking the best fit. Don't just go with the first one you find - much of therapy is about the therapeutic relationship so it needs to be the right fit.

UnshakenNeedsStirring · 21/02/2022 21:35

I was 35, got sick with a really bad flu. I couldnt talk, stand or do anything for myself at all. Just about managed to gt tot the loo to throw up or a wee. My ex at the time had to take our son to school and pick him up. But he never asked me if I need as much as a glass of water. Or food. I could hear the ping of the microwave and him using his cutlery on a plate, but he never asked me if I was hungry for 4 days.......After the second day with no food, I had a glass next to my bed and was getting water from the sink in the loo, I texted my friend to get me some soup. She couldnt believe that he hadn't asked me if I needed anything. The 4th day, I was so sick, I thought I was going to die, I desperately pleaded him to call me an ambulance or call 999. He didnt. I decided that day, I was going to leave if I ever survived that nightmare, Id leave. And I did.

ChristmasTreeGorgeous · 21/02/2022 21:46

When my husband hissed “fridge” at me on the landing (means frigid) as part of yet another row about whether or not sex was happening that weekend. Said as my 11 year old weaved between us and the 13 year old was in his room, door open.

I realised the children were unconcerned as this was just a normal Saturday morning for them. They had heard it all before.

LittleTwiglet · 21/02/2022 21:50

@UnshakenNeedsStirring oh my gosh, that sounds so awful! I cannot believe there are people out there who would leave a meant to be loved one like this!

@formalineadeline thank you for pointing me in the right direction for 'official' help. I dont have a clue where to begin, so I will have a read through when I can. I think part of it is the stigma of being a single parent, then the financial side as I don't work, the living arrangements as we private rent, the children adjusting to him not being here at all, then the emotions of them not being with me when he has time with them. I know I'm very hard on myself for having things perfect, I want to do my absolute best for them and make sure they are happy, I just have so little confidence in myself to make this happen, but I dont feel I can go on living with someone like him, the silence is deafening and when we do communicate it is like being on eggshells, I already know he gaslights me (I think that is the right term).

OP posts:
Worriesandwobbles · 21/02/2022 21:56

@penguinfacebum same here. Only 3 months down the line and the sad thing is life is no different. Still all living together, I am still doing most of the cooking cleaning shopping laundry. But something in my head (or heart) just clicked. 16 years of ups and downs and I finally just didn't care enough to fight for it. I could see that my life would be happier without him. I know it won't be easy but I want to show my daughters what not to put up with in a relationship. I know that I wasn't strong enough to go through with it a few years ago when the children were smaller though so i don't blame anyone who sticks it out a few more years until they are in a better place.

coodawoodashooda · 21/02/2022 22:00

Because I just couldn't stand his shouting anymore.

movingon2022 · 21/02/2022 23:03

I was unhappy for years before I finally decided to go for counseling. Originally, I asked my now ex to join me, and he said no, he said he felt uncomfortable talking to strangers about his personal problems. In a way this was it for me, it showed me that he was not being serious, that he did not want to do the work. Counseling helped me too to see the things as they were, to see clearly what my ex was doing and not doing and how all this made me feel. It helped me decide what I wanted (and did not want).

But really, I knew when I asked my self if I was willing to spend next 20 years with this man.

Cliche87 · 22/02/2022 09:43

I've been thinking about it for months. But this morning I might have just had the final straw. The second where something clicked.

I came downstairs to find he'd given our toddler an ice cream for breakfast because he didn't want to tidy up the mess of cereal. I went to start on the laundry and Good Morning Britain was on the TV and I heard his hiss 'shut up you silly bitch' at Susanna Reid. With such spite. And I just felt such disgust that the man I could hear was the man I was going to spend the next 40 years with. I just don't think I can do it any longer.

LittleTwiglet · 22/02/2022 11:17

This all sounds so familiar, the shouting, taking the easy option, trying to avoid the issue. I think a lot of the reason I haven't managed to leave yet is financial, I just dont know how/where to go as he is the sole earner.

OP posts:
NorthGirlie · 22/02/2022 12:56

I’d gone ten years in a sexless marriage then had my head turned. I wasn’t attracted to my husband in a sexual way. Realised how dead my marriage was and that I’d had no affection and no real connection.
I filed for divorce after waking up!

CowboyBebop · 23/02/2022 05:23

We went on a holiday where he behaved abominably and I realised I was happier on my own with the kids. We left him to be miserable on his own and it was so much better than trying to fit him in. I knew then that everything would be better if we split up. The kids have been sad from time to time but overall they have benefited from a calm, happy household. Please don't presume staying in an unhappy relationship is better for them.

Wallywobbles · 23/02/2022 06:08

When he said he was going to put the kids into care. He was drunk. But on divorce say he tried to get the judge to do exactly that.

SewingBees · 23/02/2022 08:43

@LittleTwiglet if you post on the relationships board about your situation there will be plenty of people who will advise you on what to do.

drybird · 26/02/2022 07:32

I'm also in the same position.. sadly! Financially controlled so it makes it very difficult but I've hit my point of not caring what happens next as long as I get out with my children. My H was in London Thursday.. lunching and catching up with friends then attended a black tie event, stayed over in a hotel overlooking the southbank.. me - at home two boys trying to scrape together enough money for fuel to get my son to his SEN school 76 mile round trip because local funded transport issues 😔 he never even asked if I need med help. I've paid for one son to go into breakfast club to accommodate getting the other on to his school. My H could have pitched in but said he was far to busy.. I've had many moments this was the last.

NorthGirlie · 26/02/2022 07:53

@drybird
He sounds so selfish!

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