We don't agree on childcare split. Unsure of the next stage of the process.

[dontrecycle]

Hi
I'm seeking clarity on what to next. We don't agree on the childcare split. Not had mediation but no amount of mediation will help I don't think as we have such different expectations.
Can someone explain the next stage of the process to me?
If I 'apply to Court' is it the same court hearing that decides the split of the finances as well as the split of childcare?

CMS calculator ffs

I hope your claiming it in the meantime

Ok another question. Thanks to everyone sticking with me so far.

A couple of weeks ago we agreed that we would look after the kids alternate weeks as the school is closed, then have one day a week at the weekend.

Last weekend I had them sat and him Sunday. He came back to the house 8am Sunday morning after leaving at 6am Saturday. So out of the 48 hours I had them 32 hours.

I don't want to be restricted by his movements and there was somewhere I wanted to go early Sunday (bike ride) but couldn't due to him being out.

Can anyone suggest the answer?

Huge thank you to everyone who has replied so far especially those who have given clear and precise advice. My mental health has really improved knowing what the road ahead looks like.

You need to agree weekend days and nights etc.

So you have Friday evening from 7pm to Saturday evening 7pm then him Saturday 7pm to Sunday 7pm.

You need to tie it in with weekdays to and on his weeks he includes the overnights and evenings!!!

Thank you I have suggested this is an email today.

If it's alternate weeks it may be easier to do it midweek to
Midweek tbh!

Courts are starting to realise that 50/50 is not best for the kids and taking that into consideration - 50/50 is about what the parents want not the child’s needs.
50/50 need exemplary communication between the parents to work well for the kids and most divorcing couples do not have that.
They’re also very aware that 50/50 is used by parents to avoid maintenance rather than because they genuinely want that much time with their children.

If he doesn’t do any reading or homework and would have to take them to work, I would say that the children need consistency throughout the school week and one “home”. State real examples of homework not done and how this affected the child (were they sad or embarrassed to go to school with no homework?)
I would offer every other weekend and then compromise to him having them one evening for tea too.
Court may give him 50/50 or 60/40 but if you don’t ask for what you want then you don’t get! X

You have to be clear as to why it is not Jon the best interests of the children for him to have them 50/50. That can take some doing as the courts are a little weary of mothers trying to limit access and shared care.

You will need to have evidence of his continual failings, and not anecdote