H wants to proceed without solicitors. Is that even possible?

[AForest]

H and I agreed to separate back in December, but kept things together over Christmas etc, and I suppose there never is a good to time to move things along. I am pushing for divorce however I am a stay at home mum, although I have started my own small business which will be a slow burner I think. My H is dragging his feet as he is happy with our marriage, and doesn't want to sell the house etc. He seems happy with no intimacy, no physical relationship for years, hardly speaking etc.. He has promised to see me right financially and doesn't want to use solicitors. However I feel very unsafe doing this. He has a big wage, has control over the finances, has a good pension, wants to buy me out of the house. We have 3 DC 13, 11 and 7 and two dogs. We have agreed to parent equally as far as possible and his working hours allow. I have no doubt he will look after the children well financially but I am not so sure about me. I have given up my career to be at home with the children while his career has blossomed. Our eldest has complex needs and is part time at school so it has been hard for me to resume work full-time. I am currently getting a financial settlement consultation through Wikivorce. I don't want to take him to the cleaners, but don't feel I have enough knowledge to get a fair settlement.

Has anyone divorced without solicitors? Does it work? If I use Wikivorce would he need his own legal representation. We are trying to remain amicable but he wants 50/50 and I've been told I can go for 60/40 on the house which he objected to. I think I might just have answered my own question!

@Underthefur l was also told that the divorce courts want things a lot more "fair" now and that the non resident parent is entitled to capital too in order to buy a new property.

STBXH is my case has a pension worth 6 times mine, earning capacity is greater too.

I have offset his pension against the house as it was pretty equal so he keeps all his pension and l take on the house and remaining mortgage. I have given him £25,000 in cash so he has capital for a deposit.

Just hope the Judge agrees now

How will you get a mortgage when you leave if you barely earn an income? 50% of the equity is not going to last long if you have 3 children to house and you are paying rent. Also I assume you don’t have a pension. You would be entitled to part of his.

My exh put pressure on me to sort the financials between ourselves and when I got a solicitor he was angry. We had a messy divorce but I came out better than if I had not had a solicitor.

£125k equity is very little in terms of setting up two new households to house 3 children of different sexes. How are you planning to do that? You say shared ownership but you have a fledgling business. You might be better off in the house so I'd be very reluctant to move out. You need to see a solicitor as you're going to need a pension order.

Agree it might be better for you and the children to stay in the house.

The actual divorce petition, I did myself. But in regards to property and child maintenance, I’d get a solicitors advice. Good luck

Hi Aforest. You situations does sound quite complicated and maybe a solicitor would be better. I would certainly at least have a proper appointment with one to talk through things.

That is what I did and from that exh and I did all divorce and finances ourselves.