hi there,
my expartner has finally moved out of the house we share, and is living in a flat in the same co op, just around the corner. we are trying to be amicable though it feels we explode every few days over a new matter we've not managed. i could really do with some advice cos we both feel like we're getting a raw deal and all the emotions are pretty sky high.
we have a 4 yr old son and have always gone 50/50 on childcare. my ex has never worked, and previously the deal was i paid rent and council tax out of my part time wage and he did a bit more housework as i was working 3 days a week.
now, the complication is he says we should split child benefit and split my working tax credit cos i get all my working tax credit due to having a child. i'm an absolute thickwit when it comes to maths, and our working out on the benefit checker 'entitled to' seems to come to different results. this would basically mean i pay him £70 a week for his 50% of childcare.
i'm finding it hard to separate out our raw feelings at breaking up and feeling hard done by and whats fair. this is quite terribly compounded by the fact i was hit by a car the week he was moving out and am on crutches with a really messed up leg. i'm having friends and neighbours come in and help me a little bit every day and it feels like he's not helping enough although i see him every day when we swap over with childcare. however, although he doesn't make sure there's enough food in my house to feed his child, he still has the 'housecard' to buy things for his new house. he wants to go half and half on all new things we have for either house. i would rather just do this separately cos he has more expensive tastes than me, even though i've let him take most of the stuff. i don't have a sofa anymore etc.
sorry, that turned into a whinge. i should probably add our child is managing surprisingly well seeing as this has all happened at once.
anyone been in similar?