How to complain about school?

[Rick81]

Hello, my son is 8yo. He lives with me full time ( 6 nights per week) . I wanted to change his address at school over to mine,as my address is secondary to his mother. School tells me that they can't change it without mothers permission. They know that our son lives with me, because before he moved in with me couple of years ago,he was upset and stressed out on days when his mother used to pick him up. So the school put him on SEN learning due to his emotional problems and from this point he lived with me. By his choice. We don't have a court order in place,and there is no conflict regarding our arrangement. Whenever I ask school to literally call my ex and confirm the situation so that the address issue can be resolved they say that they don't want to get involved. They said if she called by herself then 'yes. Obviously she is difficult and says that there is no reason to change anything since school holds both addresses. The problem is however if I take care of my son every day,I think it's sensible for school to have my address as number 1. When my son gets ill or something at school,am the one being called to pick him up early. I asked school for separated parents policy or anything how child's address is registered. They told me that they don't have any policy when it comes to this. I said ok ' wonderful. Can you do annual review of where the child lives? They said that they go by whoever registered the child at school ( years ago) it stays this way. I made rival Child Benefit claim because my ex still receives money towards our son. I'm waiting for response from HMRC. Even though this might not be a problem who's address is number 1 ,but I don't want it to be just incase.. I asked school for Governors board contact and was told that every complaint first goes to school reception and then is being forwarded to Governors. Which means I will have to wrestle with school over this issue for very long time. Any advice?

[LIZS]

It does not work like that, as they are trying to tell you. His dm registered him there as the primary address and contact. You have had multiple threads yet do not seem willing to take on board the limitations of the school, both legally and practically.

[Rick81]

@Needmorelego yes I guess I'm going to. I have form filled in and ready since last week. This isn't an issue at this point. CB asked only for one address letter. If they want more I will provide. The bottom line is that my son lives with me and mother doesn't deny it. Let's see what CB is going to do with this

[Dalooah]

Maybe you need to get someone called 'mum' to call the school and tell them the updated living situation. Not like they're asking her to come in person? If they can't do things normally maybe it's time to just get stuff sorted?
Why is ex refusing to let school know?

Also, do you still live within the catchment for the school? Is the school oversubscribed? Is there a waiting list for his class? Another way around would be be de-register and reapply to the school- honestly is such malarkey that they can't update the child's address. I think they're being difficult because they know his parents are separated or being discriminatory.
I know if my partner went into or called DCs school and said 'update address, they've/we've moved' they wouldn't bat an eyelid.

[Rick81]

@LIZS and to be honest. In my previous threads I had replies from people who did apply for CB even though school and GP wasn't sorted. They told me that they were awarded CB based on the amount of days child lived with them. I had one lady who told me that her and ex had court order which says child lives with father. Because the child decided to stay with mother majority of time CB transferred award to mother despite all addresses were at father's place plus court order against her. So I guess all this school bs etc could actually be irrelevant. Maybe I'm wrong

[Rick81]

@Dalooah I live walking distance from school. My ex lives 15 minutes on the bus. I don't speak to her about anything. She is difficult and everything is a "no". So I decided to do things on my own.

[CombatBarbie]

Can't your solicitor send her a letter for her to sign confirming current living arrangements. If not just proceed with the formal court order.

[Rick81]

@CombatBarbie ofcourse they can. I need to see first if CB will be transferred over to me

[LIZS]

Why do you need to wait? If you want it watertight just go ahead. CB will probably come through in the meanwhile, unless she contests it.

[Needmorelego]

@Rick81 when I filled out the forms for the doctors I did them while sat in the waiting room and then handed them straight to the receptionist. The whole thing probably took less than 20 minutes.
If you have had the form filled in for a week what are you waiting for? Just drop the form off.

[Rick81]

@LIZS yes she refused to surrender claim. But when they sent her form with days to fill in , she didn't send it back. That's what I was told last week by HMRC. They told me if she doesn't send it back they will assess it based on mine only. When I called,it was last day of the timeframe we had to send forms back. So I don't know what happend since then. I'm not going crazy paying solicitors £££ before I know what happens. Like I said I have no problems with child arrangement. Too be honest it would have been nice if she took him more.

[LIZS]

But it would be clearer for everyone to have it formalised, even receiving CB will not give you unequivocal clarity.

[Icanflyhigh]

@Comefromaway

The issue is that your child's records are not accurate. So, yes, formally complain.

This is the way I would go with it.

Also, you can write to the Chair of Governors directly without going through reception - their email address or correspondence address should be on the school website.

Your child has a right to have an accurate record and with the wrong address recorded as the primary address, it is incorrect.

With regard to Child Benefit, HMRC should award it to you as the primary carer unless your ex is contesting that this is the case.

[Rick81]

@Needmorelego the only reason why I haven't done it is because HMRC told me that one letter is good enough. They saiddon't send more. So I sent a dentist one. Also I didn't want to re-register only to find out in few weeks or months that my ex re-registered again. Going back and forth with this GP behind each other back it's just foolishness. But i can drop it off at surgery today.

[Quisquam]

Try speaking to the Information Commissioner’s office, to see if you can ask the school for the right of rectification under GDPR, to the school records - ie a change of of primary parental address, to yours where DC actually lives with you?

[Needmorelego]

@Rick81 would she bother to re register him at her GPs? If she can't even be bothered to phone the school I doubt she would.

[Rick81]

@Icanflyhigh school website says any complaints to Governors should be sent to school reception first. She didn't surrender claim, but failed to return form with days our son lives with each parent. This information I got last week Monday

[Rick81]

@Needmorelego yeah if she knows 'free cash is about to be cut off. Who knows lol

[Needmorelego]

@Rick81 the thing is unless she takes him to the doctor how would she know? If she barely has him I assume she wouldn't be taking him to the GPs very often.

[LIZS]

This is so much between you and ex, try focussing on the issues it causes your ds - his data, miscommunication etc. A co resolves this. Presumably you are entitled to cms from her if he resides with you?

[Rick81]

@Needmorelego yeah, that true.

[Rick81]

@LIZS some people from CMS told me that only recipient of child benefit can get CMS. Others told me that it doesn't matter. But majority of time when I called,I was told that without CB there is no CMS

[Quisquam]

If you do, ime on another matter, they will tell you to put your request in writing to the Data Protection Officer or Data Controller at the school. If you get no joy from the school, ring the ICO up again in a month’s time, and they will take it up with the school.

[LIZS]

@Rick81

@LIZS some people from CMS told me that only recipient of child benefit can get CMS. Others told me that it doesn't matter. But majority of time when I called,I was told that without CB there is no CMS

That can't be true , they are some who do not or cannot claim cb who would receive cms.

[Rick81]

@LIZS i know. I got different answers. One person said what u just did.

[Icanflyhigh]

@Rick81

@Icanflyhigh school website says any complaints to Governors should be sent to school reception first. She didn't surrender claim, but failed to return form with days our son lives with each parent. This information I got last week Monday

Send a letter FAO Chair of Govs and Mark it Private and Confidential. It will go to the governors via school reception and won't be opened. (I Was a school governor for a long time)!