There is so much

[UnquietDad]

... that it's no wonder only a small minority of DHs feel they can contribute.

I'd not feel happy on a "dadsnet" site where people endlessly slagged off their wives for being slatternly bitches, being bad mums, being lazy or doing all manner of other unacceptable stuff. It wouldn't be the sort of place I'd feel I'd want to contribute to. It makes me quite depressed sometimes.

There are a lot of intelligent and amusing posters here, but sometimes the easy-pot-shot-takers seem to dominate.

Damnation, done it again - header SHOULD say 'there is so much "men are tossers" stuff on here'. Makes no sense now!!

what are you on about, dear?

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I understand you need a place to sound off, but it wouold be nice to hear equal amounts about some of the GOOD things your DHs have done for once. I mean, if they can't all be such tossers or you wouldn't all still be married to them!

but Sweetheart, we need someone to put spiders out of doors and carve the Xmas Turkey, we have a Scheme you know

Message withdrawn

Yeah, I can understand that it might make uncomfortable reading but as Sleepycat says, this is often the only place we can air all those grievances and day to day frustrations that otherwise would build up until we suddenly clouted our other halves over the head out of the blue.
You know if I've had a good old rant on here, I'm often much happier (and usually someone's reply has made me laugh at the situation), so actually my husband escapes the bad temper and muttering.

But it doesn't tend to be ALL men are tossers does it? More THIS man is a tosser. ANd I have to say that reading some of the posts on here makes me appreciate dh all the more.

And MILs get it as bad as the men. And they're women.

I agree sleepy - MY DH has been a star this weekend, but I haven't said anything on here about it...

I think it's natural to post with emotion, and in great detail, when things are rocky and people are confused/hurt/need advice or just want to vent. Most people don't post when things are happy and going smoothly. "Happy" posts seem to drop off active convos quickly because there's no dilemma. Human nature I think - but not indicative of negativity toward men in general...so don't take it personally!

Glad it has got people talking anyway!

and very often the 'ladies' turn on each other.. 4x4s private ed, BF to name but a few of the 'bloody' subjects..

And it's true about the MILs. Some of you REALLY seem to hate them. Mine gave birth to my lovely DW, so I find it hard to hold all her odd foibles against her!!

Now you're surely not accusing women of being worse than men when it comes to slagging off mothers in law, are you???

My dh is wonderful but not comfortable in bragging about it on mn can make you seem smug somehow.
He is the best thing that ever happened to me and after 18 yrs together I still look at him and my heart turns over.
Not everyone however is as lucky and this is an important forum where women can let off steam and get advice.
I agree mil get a severe bashing again v lucky my mil is great better than my own mum at times.
There are positive male threads about ie boris johnson story just need to look.

I don't think men are tossers Dad.
I have a fabbo dh too.

However,a lot of people are seeking refuge from thier menfolk here.
Like you,am staggered sometimes at level of venom and also sheer volume of useless b'stards.

Lol at 'sheer volume of useless b'stards'

And it's a woman that's produced and parented the tossers and useless b'stards.

My dh is OK too, but don't tell him

I realise some people have their faults - I'm sure I have plenty, but I doubt DW would come on a place like this and moan about me. I certainly don't moan about her and wouldn't do so on "dadsnet" if it existed!

I may be old-fashioned but I think it would kind of make you look small and unchivalrous to whinge about your wife being a "useless b1tch" because she, I don't know, didn't put out, or didn't clean behind the cooker, or refused to wear a short skirt, or something else equally stereotypically female...

I take the point about other threads though. I noticed a "my dh is wonderful" one just yesterday.

hey, unquietdad, would you be happy about having a male cleaner/DIY MAN in the house?

I'd be happy to be able to afford a cleaner of any sort. And we often have people round to do DIY!

UD.. I understand your comments as I would be very hurt if my DH bitched about me to others. However, what I read some poor women have to put up with leaves me speechless. It´s not always that easy to just get up and leave I guess, or practical.

Also, like SC said, MN is a place to vent your feelings if you don´t have any good friends or family willing to listen.

Perhaps we should start a "my DH/DW is fantastic because..." thread, lol.

I think we are all guilty from time to time on focusing on the 'negative' things in life, & I have to admit they tend to outway the 'positive'.

I do think that women find it easier than men to have a rant about their DP/DH's.

Im very lucky-I have a super DH in more ways than one,& still pinch myself sometimes when I hear or see what some people have to put up with.

my dh is not a tosser all the time....
just mostly.
and he admits it!
what more could i ask?!