Don't mean to intrude.....but I'd like a man's POV please.....

[VeniVidiVickiQV]

Was having a conversation with DP about film actors, and why Sean Bean always played a bad guy.

I said it was because (I think) he is not very attractive. DP said that he wouldnt know about that. I disagreed.

Now, he says he doesn't look at men and think about whether they are attractive looking/ugly etc.

I dont buy this (and actually said "dont worry, it doesnt make you gay or anything" which is probably not very tactful but i figured it had a bearing)

Surely hetero/gay men dont just look at women/men and decide if they have a nice face/physique or not?

Do they....?

"Whether they would suit me" in case my clothes don't materialise out of that van...

I think that men don't bitch about it the way woemn do, but bloody well can tell a sean bean from a richard ashcroft. any man who says he can't is a liar imo.

but I have to agree that while he's not the most attractive actor around, old sean isn't ugly.

I'm with you SP of course they can tell. People have to be able to know what is and isn't attractive in their own gender, or they would have no idea what to aspire to in themselves.

Blokes fib about it. Plain and simple . There's a big difference between thinking someone is attractive and finding someone attractive.

Hub (I still havent got them back yet!)

greensleeves, thats exactly how my dp described it, he can tell not in an 'i'm attracted to him' sort of way but in how he'd like to look himself in an ideal world, how he'd feel sexy and attractive looking.

We can tell; we're not Neanderthals LOL, but honestly, we dont spend many CPU cycles on thinking in this way - unless directed by a specific - how attractive is x man compared to y man.

(I also don't think men spend a lot of time thinking the 'I could look like that in an ideal world' (unless I'm a bit weird). We look like what we look like.

Simple, really.

I'm with the rest - I don't get involved, nor am I a looker myself- but surely Sean Bean and Richard Ashcroft have both had a brush with the less-than-Adonis stick? Oh, and have you ever seen them in the same room?

Lol! BITBBH!

When you are looking on screen and its a cross between Nicholas Cage (City of Angels swooooooooooooon) and Sean Bean, I know who'd get my, er, vote

If a man ever says he can't tell who is better looking out of Jose Mourinho and Iain Dowie then he is lying.

Ian Dowie mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

Only insecure men don't talk about how attractive other men are. I often comment on how attractive a man is or isn't, Brad Pitt, Johnny Depp are sickeningly gorgeous. I'd do them both in an instant.

Sean Bean always plays a bad guy because he's British and Hollywood loves a stereotype.

Sean Bean is farking gorgeous. Unlike Nic Cage with his googly eyes (bleurgh).

Think a lot of blokes have an over-inflated idea of their own physical attractiveness and will only recognise Brad Pitt-type gorgeousness as being better-looking than they are. So there's not much point checking them out iyswim.

Also, blokes have a whole range of status-points to worry about, so are just as likely to be hoping the other bloke's penis is smaller, or that he earns less or has a squeakier voice or whatever. Looks aren't such a big part of status for men as a woman's looks are.

The weird thing imho is how differently men and women rate female beauty - e.g. do you think Cate Blanchett is beautiful? Bet you won't find many men who do...)

I'm nothing special to look at, but honestly I have never thought once that I shouldn't shark in on a woman because some other guy is more attractive than me.
An conversely, never thught my chances were much better because she happened to be talking to someone I judged to be more ugly.

Well, I dont think she is beautiful. She certainly has an attractive "willowy" quality, but I wouldnt say beautiful, or pretty.

Jose Mourinho....as a woman and a Chelsea supporter.......

HD, when you say you often comment, do you mean you are happy to comment when asked, or just offer up your opinion as you note what you are seeing?

DC, what if she was being chatted up by Sean Bean?

LOL CM!

I'd lose against Sean.
He's a celebrity, and having had experience of women in the presence of celebs, wouldn't even try to compete.
If howevere, you mean someone who is as attractive as him, then I probably wouldn't even notice his looks in my evaluation of my chances.

VVVQV, both or either.

Not ALL women are like that DC!!!!

We're not all star struck money grabbing bimbo's......

(mind you - I accept you are likely to find more of those in the same place where schlebs hang out)

I'd concur with the other men on this topic. If asked, I don't find it hard to decide whether a guy is good-looking or not (for the record, I usually do it on the basis of "do I wish I looked like that?"). But in the normal course of a day's activities, the function of considering attractiveness simply doesn't take place when assessing other men in the same way that it does when interacting with women.

It's evolutionary. Why take up time assessing the viability of a non-mate? We're more likely to determine where the male sits in the social pecking order so as to determine whether he is or is not a threat to our own status and - hence - mating chances.

For a woman, by contrast, there is less of an element of competition for mates (prehistorically, one male can inseminate several females, but one female can be inseminated by only one male), so status is less important a consideration than physical health (which is an important contributor to the tribe's survival, long-term).

None of this is to say that men are uncontrollable sex maniacs, but many (most?) of our automatic cognitive functions are dicated by pre-civilization evolutionary imperatives.

R.

So, in essence, what you are saying is, that all men are in fact just like cavemen

I don't "get" Cate Blanchett. She looks like a cross between a hamster and.....the Moog off Willo the Wisp. And she can't spell her own name.

I think Liv Tyler is beautiful.

dh40k is too clever for me! he sounds like a scientist!!

brad pitt? gorgeous?! why?!?!?!?!
then again, i never found someone apparently hailded as 'oh, soooo gorgeous/mmmmmmm' remotely attractive....
pitt, cage.. what do u see in them????