How do you stay sane while querying agents?

[CakeRage]

I finished my first book earlier this year (after saying for years I was going to write it), and started submitting to agents 3 weeks ago.

I’ve had a couple of replies, both really encouraging, but ultimately both rejections, and I feel like I’m losing my marbles. How do you keep it together while waiting? Not sure I can take the emotional rollercoaster

The first agent replied within hours to ask for the full manuscript, emailed again the following day to say she was halfway through and absolutely blown away by it, then a few days later to say she did love it, but thought it needed a few changes making. I revised the whole thing (10,000 extra words of work), then she replied just to say it wasn’t working, and she wouldn’t be taking it further.

To be honest I’ve been pretty gutted by it. How do you stop the little judgy voice in your head which tells you you were an idiot for getting your hopes up?

The second agent replied to say she was really impressed by my writing, but didn’t feel I was a good fit for her list at the moment, and recommended another agent (different agency) who she thought would like it. I handled that one much better, even though I guess it was more of an abrupt no.

Please tell me how you cope with this stage - or come commiserate with me at its horribleness!

(Sorry for my crazed rambling - feeling all my feelings this week!)

Hang on, how do we know who @CaptainBrickbeard's agent is? Is there a secret agent code I'm not getting?

Maybe @Captain's agent is my agent, come to think of it.

I think I haven’t been very discreet and hello has put two and two together!

Sorry I worked it out from twitter and things mentioned in thread, Captain hasnt said! I follow said agent and they confirmed a signing today!

I hope you get a good response to the chapters hello.

I did have to go check if Captain’s agent was one of my two full agents, but it isn’t, lol! Neither are prolific tweeters, which is probably a good thing but I find endlessly frustrating when trying to invent reasons in my head why they haven’t replied yet.

Cake,

Have you tried querytracker.net? It helped me understand why agents were not replying as quickly as expected. I think its worth a peruse.

Captain
Thanks! I genuinely think you have one of the top agents in the land, so keep us posted. I want to pre order the book already!

Oooh Captain, she’s on my list too! Have followed her for a long time, well done :)

Ok, haha, I do now know who Captain’s agent is!

She isn’t on my list but only cause I didn’t think she’d like my MS. Good work Captain!

Matey, I have tried querytracker, but it didn’t help a massive deal. One of my agents seems to form reject lightning fast, but her full responses are vast and varied. The other has no full responses tracked at all (but I am only looking at the free bit), so it’s anyone’s guess. Going to start nudging in September if I need to, just reluctant to burst my bubble of having fulls out, if you know what I mean!

That must be frustrating Cake. It's the not knowing that is really maddening. But be proud of your full requests, shows there was something in your writing that excited agents.

I sent out to 5 last Sunday. No response. Am losing hope of a full request as nearly everyone I know has had a full request within 3 days.

My last full request was after nearly three weeks, Matey, so I wouldn’t give up yet. Especially considering the time of year. I bet a lot of agents are either on holiday or catching up on their reading from being on holiday.

And yeah, I’m finding the whole process frustrating, to be honest. And ridiculously demoralising.

I know I can write. I may be new to novels, but I wrote commercially for twenty years - I even mentored younger writers in the businesses I worked for. But now I feel like a bumbling novice again - I’m second-guessing every comma!

Even worse, I feel like this process is making me hate books. Is that weird? I just read them and rather than enjoying them I spend the whole time wondering why they got published and I didn’t like some kind of bitter old hag.

@Hellomatey001, don't lose heart. Everyone's away, agents and editors. I think everything, if not actually shut down, is on a go-slow for the month of August. My first novel is out with editors and while the first few responses were very fast, everything has gone completely silent for a fortnight now.

Apart, obviously, from @CaptainBrickbeard's new agent!

@CakeRage, I feel your pain. I must admit to reading more 19thc novels since mine has been out to editors, probably for that reason!

I know what you mean about other books, Cake. I'm an avid reader, as I expect most writers are, and my house is full of books. Sometimes I look around and it's as if every book is taunting me by saying 'here's someone who succeeded where you failed!'.

I feel it particularly if I'm reading a book that has disappointed me - the 'how did this get published' frustration. It doesn't bother me as much if I am reading a well-written book, or a book that's in a genre I wouldn't attempt. But I hate the 'bitter old hag' feeling!

No news from me except that two of my submissions have now expired without response. Four still out - all sent at the start of the month. It feels hopeless - but can only keep on keeping on ...

Thanks Labassecour! I know I am expecting the worst but I think its self preservation really when the inevitable rejections come rolling in. But I am being too negative I know!

Cake, I feel exactly the same! I too have worked as a professional writer, even worked for a short time on TV soaps writing. But God damn it, I am questioning my ability, whether I can even construct a sentence correctly, whether the blinkers were on all the time.

And even now, me walking past books in the supermarket, furrowing my brow snarling at them like, muttering "author must have had contacts!" like some psychotic loser. I am doing it already!

This forum is providing much needed support though.

I take heart from Captain's words: right agent, right time. I think that chemistry and timing is what we all need!

Sorry for repeated words in post, typing quickly in a coffee shop! I promise my ms is not as poorly written!

I know I am expecting the worst but I think its self preservation really when the inevitable rejections come rolling in. But I am being too negative I know!

Well, I'm doing exactly the same thing one step on, with an agent and my novel out with editors, so I hear you! But my agent is very efficient, and I have asked her to pass on every no my novel gets asap (because I'm that kind of person), but though the first batch came back fairly rapidly in early August, it's been complete silence for a fortnight from the people who still have it.

Sorry for repeated words in post, typing quickly in a coffee shop! I promise my ms is not as poorly written!

Lol, Matey, I think this all the time! I normally post from my phone, so autocorrect is always having its way with my words and I feel mortified when one slips through. Aren’t we daft?

Labassecour - good luck with your editor submissions! You are at least one step above most of us on the food chain but that step sounds really stressful too. Hope you get some good news soon

Congrats to those with agents! I think I know who your agent is too captain unless there are multiple agents excited about signing Greek stories! If it’s the one I think then they are really great, massively exciting for you!

Just got accepted onto competitive-entry workshop with quite prestigious author, just got rejected from competitive-entry short story course. Aargh! Entered both twice under own and ‘married’ name, got accepted twice to workshop and rejected twice from course.

Still no replies but I have had 10 days away from my ms. I had completed it in time for a writing festival and sent it out. The silence from agents had got me thinking.

Coming back to it now, after the break and studying a bit more about writing styles, I want to overhaul it.

Thankfully I sent it out to only 7 agents (eek!) but still have another 20 to go! Feel a bit of a fool but quite excited about getting stuck into the ms again.

Don’t feel silly, Matey, it’s a process and we all learn along the way. You’re still really early on - maybe where I was when I started this thread? It’s not been easy but I’ve learned so much since then.

I’m on my hols now, so I haven’t even thought about any of it since we’ve been away and I’m finding it so refreshing! We’re back in September and then I plan to full steam ahead book two, though. Less griping, more writing

Oh, spoke too soon - one of my fulls was rejected today with what reads like a form rejection. Did she even read it, I wonder?

I have decided, though, not to submit to any more agents than I already have. I’m going to wait for the rest of the rejections to roll in (or the times to expire), and then I’m going to self publish it under a different name and start again with book two.

This process has made me doubt myself and beat myself up so much that I’ve forgotten what I have to be proud of. Other than the people I’ve submitted it to (lol), every person who’s read it has loved it. Maybe agents and publishers don’t like it, but readers do.

I didn’t get into this writing business to become a household name, I got into it to tell my story and connect with readers. I don’t want to just shove it in a cupboard and forget it forever

Cake, I think that is a good attitude to have. I went to a workshop with Rachel Abbott. She outlined how she self published and promoted her book. She has sold hundreds of thousands through determined hard work and I was impressed.

But beyond that be very proud that you have delighted readers already. I for one would read if you self published!

Oh cake, I’m so sorry, it is absolutely gutting I know.

Go and look up the author of ‘The Help’. The book was rejected over a hundred times. When she got an agent, the latter sent it out the next week with very few changes and it sold for a lot of money. It is all so baffling.

That’s why I was like aaargh above... the same pieces of work were good enough to fight off competition for a free place at a workshop but both not good enough for a short story comp. But then I looked up the tutor and honestly, I really don’t like his style of writing at all. So although initially it felt so gutting to be rejected, I guess I understand it.

Okay, also back from holiday here, let’s get on with these new books!

Sorry, by short story comp I mean course, it was both expensive and based on a piece of work to be submitted. They had 80 applications for 10 places apparently.