Sick of having plenty of money on paper but not enough to actually live!

[MrsMop2026]

We get around £3,000 a month on paper that is loads.
Shouldn’t be struggling at all but why am I always struggling to put clubcard vouchers & pennies together at the end of the month.

Rent - £1,200
gas & elec - £300 (paying back some debt)
council tax - £150
water - £35 (on a special tarfif)
petrol - £200 (but obviously that’s now going up and god knows what that will come too - and yes I use my free bus pass where I can and no I can’t use less)
cats - £200 (i have four so it’s expensive Im trailing the cheaper supermarkets litter at £2.99 for 10 litres atm so hoping to get this down and next I will try cheaper cat food)
Food - £600 (cant get this cheaper ones diabetic other has AFRID)

leaving me with £260 a month but that just seems to go so quickly with school uniform, school trips, the occasional day out. :(

I don’t drink, I don’t smoke, I don’t do expensive days out, takeaways are a luxury in this house.
It is so stressful isn’t it? How does everyone else manage?

No I haven’t? He even has a job interview this weekend which I already said about.

She's already said that he's been applying for those sort of jobs.

Another needing the Mumsnet remedial classes in reading & comprehension.

Definitely apply for universal credit OP, it exists to help people like your family.

I’m usually the last person to say people who are struggling financially should just rehome their pets, but it sounds like you may be open to it if a suitable owner. I 100% agree with not listing them for free online, would any of your colleagues perhaps be interested in one?

But it's not loads when £1350 is rent and council tax. Don't you get carers allowance if you are a full time carer for DC with so many medical needs? Do the DC go to school? If so you should try to get a term time job and if there are medical appointments you and DH do half each; that way no job is affected as much.

Certainly feels that way. This is why I didn’t want to claim benefits because of people judging. Thank you to the very kind commentators who have been helpful and not just given me highly unrealistic answers though.

I would wait until you see what your UC entitlement is before DH continues applying for jobs. If you can get by without him working then that would be better. If he’s doing enough to be entitled to carers allowance then it sounds like it’s taking up a lot of his time, you deserve family time and your DH deserves a break as well.

In the space of 30 days. Dc1 has had 6 days off school from refusal, one opticians appointment, one doctors appointment, 4 afternoons where he needed picking up early as he felt “sick.”
Dc2 has had 3 days off with ketones and one day off for medical appointments. It’s just not possible.
And if anyone tells me send them anyway, I will absolutely loose my cool.

OP there is nothing wrong with Aldi cat food. It actually has quite high meat. Also the tins are far better value than the pouches.

owning cats is a luxury.

if struggling to cover costs for your family and you can’t both work due to your kids’ health it’s an obvious solution. You can vet the family they go to - a family with kids is unlikely to be taking cats for a dog fight…

Is he newly-diagnosed? Can't advise much on the finances but as a mum to a T1 diabetic, if he's not in the adjustment period I'd seek support to help him come to terms with the diagnosis and how to kove forward in a way that is manageable and working towards an independent life.

Yes I will give it a go, do they do gravy though? 3 will eat jelly. My elderly one is extremely fussy and will only eat gravy, yet will happily eat quavers? 😂

3k is an ok amount for a single person, but it’s definitely not loads for a family of 4. Not surprised that things are tight.

I'm in the SE OP - it's only a little thing, but check for lower Broadband rates. I only pay £25.99 for mine, and had to re-contract to get it, but it's v fast (Plusnet - no I don't work for them!) I know it can dependant on area, but worth a try.
I'm not surprised you're struggling - a family of 4 on £1800 p/m after rent.
Definitely claim everything you're entitled to, and get the cats on some cheaper food. My cat actually costs more to feed than my dog - the latter is happy with a big bag of Arden Grange, whereas the cat only eats Whiskas!

Yes getting support for it and slowly getting more independent, can do cgm changes and prime pens etc it’s just the idea of self injecting! Getting there though, it’s the hypos i am more concerned about not hypo aware and had a few bad lows where legs gone under them when it’s hit! Not great at listening out for alarms neither, looking at a sugar pixel.

Hopefully a closed-loop pump will be available soon - what a game changer. My son was giddy when he realised he wouldn't need to inject several times a day. Far better control too.

If ive read correctly you are apply for more dla for one child? When that gets awarded and you tell uc make sure to request the back date the payment to the date you applied most people dont know they are ment to back date it.

Id double check you are entitled to everything. Entitled to is a good site for it

£3k for 4 people with almost half going on rent is not much OP. I know how quickly it gets eaten up.

There is nothing wrong with spending money on much wanted and adored members of family such as cats !

all these people saying rehome them!
would you rehome family members?????

Read the OP and assumed both were working. Apologies for upsetting you so much.

@MrsMop2026
I cannot give practical advice, so thought a pet food anecdote might be welcome:

I have had house rabbits for years. They are notoriously picky about their "sensible" food. One bun jumped up onto my lap and landed ON my lunch plate. He had a nibble of my cheese sandwich and mini cheese biscuits. The next jump up was a deliberate attempt to get more of my lunch 😏

The big tins are jelly but they do pouches with gravy which would be cheaper than branded cat food. I buy my cats Republic of Cats little tins but my large Maine Coone cat actually prefers an Aldi pouches, so he gets 1 little tin and 1 pouch morning and again evening with the Purina kibble available around lunch time and overnight.

What about phones?

The judgemental ones would be the first claiming everything if they were faced with an austic child, managing T1 in a young child and only bringing home £3k a month. They just like to shit on people from their high horses. Ignore them.

Credit due to you for financially managing on what many single people struggle on too. I know UC is ridiculous but would be shocking if you weren't entitled to some help.

Wish mine would wear a pump, been offered a few different ones but doesn’t fancy wearing a second device. Barely any hypos & highs sounds like a dream 🥰

Could hubby get a job around your hours? Also could your diabetic child have a pump fitted to increase their independence?
Agree though , the COL is just rubbish , I can't see it easing up anytime soon (or probably ever!l at this rate)