Frugal Friends Facing Forward with Fortitude

[Happierwithouthim]

Here's a friendly space for new and existing frugal friends.

We have all different types of incomes and lifestyles but with a common goal of making the best of the money we have.

Many of us have experiences of becoming debt free or being in difficulty with money for one reason or another so there's no need for embarrassment, just join in, post as little or as often as you wish.

Some record daily spends, some record only spends that are unplanned, some don't record spends at all, the choice is yours!

Spends yesterday
€66 on contact lenses, new ones are more expensive €39 of this was budgeted. I adjusted my package down to 10 pairs per month from 20 pairs, making it €22 monthly rather than €44, currently €39, I can change this online whenever I need to. Checking to see if I can return 30 pairs of previous prescription, fingers crossed worth €117.

60c parking
€35.35 in Supervalu using €5 off €35 and buying a piece of salmon €18
€53.80 in penneys on clothes for dc, all budgeted for
€20 on a phone case, my last one is about 5 years old and I got a tip of €10 yesterday so it felt like I was treating me. Returned my iphone cable and got replacement FOC
Might not be able to get perfume refilled, the chemist is to ring me today and let me know.

€5.50 on 0% cider at bookclub
€5.50 on next months book on Amazon Kindle
I really enjoy bookclub, they're people who aren't part of my daily life and I enjoy the conversations we have.

Rum great work on off peak train saving
Hack sounds very unbalanced & unfair, hopefully Peleton trial will work out
Girlie that's great about the savings
Chile exciting to have holiday paid off, well done on sensible pension choice

I'd overspent categories last month of €264, I could cover them from other things but don't want to! I will reduce this months categories by the appropriate amount in due course.

Child Benefit next Tues of €280 - €100 to Treats/Sweets category(this will be reduced by €16.84 that we went over by in Jan - I use this for things like cinema/buying games etc) and will put €50 each into their clothing categories and remaining €40 into my clothing category. the €16.84 will go towards one of the other overspends.

@Nellieinthebarn could you try collecting your receipts for a month so you can start to find out?

@2024Hackathon maybe it's worth exploring the different types of therapy and seeing what might be a good fit for you - cut, dbt, analytic, etc.? Setting yourself on fire to keep others warm is rarely a good method.

@RumBananaSundae good luck with the mediation session

It's nap time here, thank goodness! About to try and get a siesta too whilst I can. I'm starting to feel not too great so want to try and shift it ASAP with rest.
Will need to go for a proper shop this weekend. And try and do some listings.

NSD so far

@Happierwithouthim book club sounds brilliant 🌟 and well done on your thorough budgeting

£23 at Lidl. That's more like it! I realise shopping at Sainsbury's when demotivated about cooking leads to purchases like slow cooked pork (£5.50 for two helpings), slow cooked duck (same), ready-made Parmentier potatoes, microwaveable veg, 2 packs of stuffed pasta...the plastic, never mind the expense is alarming. I did spend (unregretted) money on nice dark chocolate, loads of nice teas, Sabra hummous (£2.50 - I remember I used to baulk at spending £1.50 on it, and would wait for it to be on offer), blackberries
and Method floor cleaner - if there's a boring job to do, I would at least like the place to smell nice as a consequence.

The Holdovers was very good. Felt like an American New Wave movie of the 70's, which is high praise in my book.

Right, post office - of course, I've timed it horribly, so might listen to a podcast in the queue. Or take a book.

Another lovely day here, will take Ddog out for a good run this afternoon - an extra hour of daylight makes all the difference.

Got interrupted

I'm taking on board everything that's being said about being organised and telling family members how to find things and deal with it.

I tried to start with car paperwork this morning, but kid got sent home feeling out of sorts. I'll get going again this evening.

Went shopping today and spent £14.37 in Home Bargains and £53.89 in Lidl which I'm okay with.
Forgot to check Octopus and missed out on a lights out savings evening - maybe next time.
Menu-planned with my lists from tins, freezer, packet mixes and shopping today and so far 11 meals - there are more to think about but I will be using Tesco's suggestion app for meals from listed ingredients. It's good to get different ideas for meals.
Also bought baking ingredients - going to try making bread and cakes from scratch - don't know that they will be healthier but they will be cheaper. 😋

Chile - maybe it's worth exploring the different types of therapy and seeing what might be a good fit for you - cut, dbt, analytic, etc.? Setting yourself on fire to keep others warm is rarely a good method.

DBT has always sounded very grounded to me and is the one that would attract me.

DH and I managed a 7min budget chat before his severe shaking set in and we had to stop. However, when I asked for a rough estimate of how much of our joint post-tax income we should reserve for our personal spends, he said, "10%". And when I asked how we should proportion that between us, he replied "Evenly". So, the next step is to get up a spreadsheet from our accounts and show how that's actually working out in practice.

£145 in Aldi, bit horrific but that does include some toiletries and cleaning stuff, and some things for the pantry that I was completely out of like kidney beans and chickpeas and some basics like flour, sugar and oil for the whole month.

I transferred the £300 that would have gone on council tax straight into savings, so if its not in the current account I won't be tempted to spend it.

The pantry is a thing of beauty with its new containers and tins all lined up in rows. Very pleasing indeed.

Rainbow - Also bought baking ingredients - going to try making bread and cakes from scratch - don't know that they will be healthier but they will be cheaper.

Good luck. Are you starting off with no-bake traybakes or going straight in with flapjacks, fruitcake or similar? White bread, granary, wholemeal or rye?

£172 on the payment for dds necklace, I've seen a photo and it's absolutely beautiful 😍 so pleased, dd will love it 💕

£50 fuel
£5 drinks and snacks.

So glad to get to Friday, works been manic and I'm knackered.

£20 cat microchip
£14 birthday present stuff
Saved on lunch as my parents just came to mine instead of us going to a cafe. We also went for a walk on a local estate that I'd never been to before which is another free activity dh, dd and I can do on a weekend.

@Nellieinthebarn organised pantry = heaven! 😇
@Girliefriendlikespuppies fingers crossed. I still have my 18th birthday necklace and love it
@Nibblynobbly great to find a local free activity

Didn't get round to listing - too difficult with lurgy dd. But I managed a little nap so I'm feeling a bit more able to take on the weekend. Did get quite a few house chores done and yet more laundry so I wasn't totally idle.

Acc1
-1199

Spends
£65 petrol

Just finished work 😳 but we have had some good news today about staffing/ workload going forward. So I’m hopeful the worst days are behind us. At least it stops me going out spending!
necklace sounds fab girlie and that sounds like a good haul nellie. I also love a full pantry!
nibbly good for the free activities.
rainbow that sounds an economical shop
Hope your little one is ok elf
big I fancy seeing the holdovers too, sounds good
happier I have overspent all my categories too, need to claw back the car and Xmas spending
hack gosh that sounds really tough. Hope you can access some counselling that you would find supportive. Puts my issues with DH not being very savvy in perspective.
One joint spend I have been looking into…DP and I are considering getting married after nearly 30 years. Well I’m poking him into it for financial reasons - just to feel better with all the loose ends tied up. Neither of us have ever been bothered about being married up til now. We would literally have a super quiet registry do with 2 friends as witnesses, I really don’t want any more fuss than that. But I’m a bit shocked at the prices! The actual ceremony is about £50 but even our local town hall is £200 for a fairly grotty room! Unless we find it cheaper I may wait another few years 😂

@marthasmum don't know if it helps but getting the equivalent legal documents drawn up that replicate marriage protections would cost far in excess without even mentioning pension/death in service/inheritance tax/next of kin benefits.

@marthasmum we did that a few years ago £125 (Aberdeen). We call it our marriage of convenience we only did as we were buying our first house after 17 years together.

@2024Hackathon I will probably try some dairy free cup cakes first as GS is with us for an overnight stay tomorrow and he loves cake but his Mum buys from the free from varieties.
I've found a no knead white bread to try for the air fryer - which I got from an FB group - so will give that a whirl. I hadn't even thought about flapjacks but do have porridge oats (never even thought to think about cereals for my lists!! 😱) I do have honey in the cupboard which we bought on holiday last year which I can use but no butter but a quick google says Stork will do the job. 😊Also have currants in the cupboard - so you have inspired me with your suggestions - I can see rock buns being attempted at some point too. Thank you!! 😋

Ooops! Miscalculated acc1. It's -1063. At least I miscalculated in the other direction so I feel better. Will encourage me to eke out savings where possible to try and get it to under 1000 by end of Feb!

Can't remember if I had said but Jan tot up revealed 2 areas of unaccounted (over)spends. £45 on non urgent home bits and £95 on family activities.

Going to try and get out for a family walk today weather and sickness all being well. And try and tick 2 diy jobs off the to do list.
Happy weekend 🥳 everyone

That sounds nice nibbly!
chile we do have a will and pensions nominated to each other. But it’s stuff like inheritance tax (not quite sure if we’re in the bracket, as it seems quite complex…) and for me, more about making it simpler for whoever sorts stuff if one of us dies - access to banks accounts etc.

@marthasmum yes, my post wasn't meant to be a pro or anti marriage post, more an informative post. Fundamentally marriage is a legal contract and there are rights/provisions that go along with that. Have you got POA sorted? As that's also something to take into account - your or your partners parents would potentially legally be the entitled decision makers in an event you/dp were incapacitated.
Afraid I couldn't give iht information without more detail but https://www.gov.uk/inheritance-tax is pretty helpful for a lay overview. If your house is over 325k it would certainly be a consideration (depending on whether you have a joint tenants or tenants in common agreement)

Doom and gloom taxation aside! 🤣 it's been a successful morning.
Library check ✔️
Diy job 1 ✔️
Avoided lidl bakery ✔️ 🤣

Thank you chile ❤️ our house is probably worth more than £325,000 now but what I’m confused about is whether inheritance tax means £325000 each iyswim? I think probably I need a chat with a lawyer, so that’s when I go round in circles and think we might as well be married! Possibly I am a bit more ambivalent about marriage than I think still. Well done on your jobs, I fell into the Lidl bakery trap and emerged clutching 2 loaves which is bad diabetes wise and financially…

@marthasmum - Martin Lewis has a good explanation of IHT. It's broadly: Married couples don't incur any IHT if one predeceases the other, but can pass on their allowance. The issue comes when the remaining spouse dies and the children/inheritors have to deal with any tax due on the estate. Each person is entitled to an allowance of £325k plus £150k if it's the family home. One spouse can pass that allowance on to the surviving spouse, and they're added together when the tax on the estate is calculated. So, I predecease DH, pass on my IHT allowance (£500k) but because we are married, there's no tax liability anyway on property that goes to him. When DH dies, he has my IHT allowance to add to his (£350k plus £150k on the family/marital home), bringing it to £1m. Anything above £1m would be potentially liable for IHT. In London, it's not that hard to hit that threshold. (although I think there is another wrinkle which might make the threshold higher).

We took out life insurance to cover that liability, and wrote it into trust. It doesn't cost much each month, and it means that there would be a sum available to cover tax, which would prevent DS having to sell property fast and possibly disadvantageously. Rich people can afford to give away large chunks while still alive, but that's not our situation.

today I have changed the beds, run the pillows through the tumble drier (surprising amount of water emerges, ewww), done a bunch of washing/tumble drying/hanging out/ironing, mended a jumper, tidied the kitchen and bathrooms, and watched a webinar on networking. Going to make a sweet potato curry tonight and DH is doing apple and blackberry crumble, yess!!

Thank you chile and big that is really helpful.

I hung some washing out to dry for the first time this year

Thank you Chile1978.

Your pantry sounds delightful Nellie.

Glad work might be looking up martha. Given how much I’m currently paying my solicitor getting married is certainly cheaper.

Have spent a total of £12.45 today on groceries. Most in celebration of changing my broadband/wifi with a saving of £130 a month. Then got an email from Virgin saying they wouldn’t honour it and I had to reapply. Couldn’t reapply as the webpage was blank. Got so frustrated on the phone decided I’d go with a £55 a month WiFi only. For the woman to say oh call back tomorrow that department is closed. I’ve spent about six hours dealing with Virgin today. All I have to show for it is a cancelled contract.

This weekend is turning out more stressful than planned.