Sick of being cold

[dreammattemousse]

I just need a rant!
Me and my children left an abusive relationship, I left with nothing,
Not even a phone.
Ive worked incredibly hard and stayed with family and have just managed to buy a house by myself. (I'm grateful every day for this)
But I'm bloody cold
I can't afford to put the heating on, and my son asked me why there is smoke coming out of his mouth.
I grew up in a freezing cold house and I swore I'd never let my kids suffer like I did.
Im so grateful we are safe and free,
And I used to love this time of year but it's affecting me quite badly, physically and emotionally!
Does anyone else feel the same?
I'm doing absolutely everything I can and it's helping (hot water bottles, layers etc) but the reality is..
I have a pretty constant headache and shoulder ache from being so bloody cold.
Roll on next summer 😅

I was going to say about damp making it feel colder. I live in a cold house and it often feels warmer outside which I think is to do with humidity levels, although we don’t have damp.
It might sound daft, but it can help to open doors and windows to let the damp air out and fresh air in. A dehumidifier can help too.

I leave curtains closed in rooms I don’t use much even though there is double glazing.

I have to wear lots of layers - leggings with trackies over the top, thick socks and slippers, t shirt, thin fleece, thick fleece and fingerless gloves to feel normal.

It is worth having the heating in for a while just to reduce the misery.

Some houses are just cold. Mine is one that’s one half is much warmer than the other, which can feel like the arctic.
Heated throw? Thermal vests, long sleeves? Always wear a scarf, it traps heat around your shoulders. Oversized fleece top indoors, (Vinted) vest underneath. Thickest socks you can find.
Have soup before a meal, cheap to make with onions, carrots and a potato and stock powder or cubes, or chuck lentils in. Makes you feel warm and fuller for longer.

Also, check online at your local council, you might be eligible for free extra house insulation. Are you claiming any benefits you’re entitled to as that ( I think) also gives you the extra winter heating allowance.

I have the same issue, seem to live in a very cold house and I live alone and trying to limit the heating as clearly only one income coming in.
I have gone down the heated blanket routes, maybe I am just unlucky but I have ended up returning at least three. All of them only heated up in patches in the blanket and never got very warm. I then bought one from a supermarket which stopped heating up after a couple of months and I had mislaid the receipt.
At the end of the day you are heating the person whilst the air around you is freezing basically.
So currently it's blankets and a hot water bottle. I have some thermal socks which are great and I picked up some thermal leggings at a good price in B&M last year.
As for dehumidifiers if you are trying to cut costs well of course the electric bill will be racking up.

If you haven't already done so, register for Freecycle in your area. In my neck of the woods household items such as curtains, draught excluders, etc appear very frequently. You can make yourself very warm by snuggling under a secondhand duvet while watching TV etc; it doesn't have to be heated.

I grew up in an icy house in the southwest. It was always damp because of the climate down there. I go back to visit now and the thermostat is generally below 10* in the winter.
There was no central heating. We wore coats and hats in the house, even to bed, and tended to congregate in one room with a little gas heater, which made it even damper.
The best thing is to have plenty of blankets etc on the sofa and the beds, wear woolly hats, fingerless gloves, and lots of layers, ideally thermals, with a big fluffy dressing gown on top of everything. Block up any cracks and gaps in windows etc. Hang heavy curtains (from the charity shop) to cut down on drafts. You can buy secondary glazing film from B&Q etc which is easy to stick up if you’ve only got single glazing.
There are often grants available for free additional insulation if you’re on benefits.
Some areas have local libraries etc providing ‘warm banks’ where you can hang out and keep warm. Joining up with local groups that allow you to go somewhere warm for an hour or two.

We haven’t got our heating on yet, so do all of the above to keep warm, but it is miserable.

A brisk walk together when you have time really gets the circulation going and warms you up for a couple of hours afterwards.

If you can get a dehumidifier (.Gumtree/eBay/Facebook perhaps?) it'd likely be a very good investment. The damp will make your place feel so much colder.I can't get over the difference it makes at my place. Definitely one of the best investments I made for this house ( it's damper than Atlantis!) .

Other than heated throws, (which are brilliant) Snugglesafe Pads or Scottie All Nighters are excellent. You need a microwave to heat them but once heated, if wrapped strategically in a fleece they will stay hot for 10 hours in my experience.
It's an excellent and safe option for your cat during the cold weather. I wrap them so there are several layers of fleece over most of it but one one layer of fleece over about 2 inches of it (it's all in the folding) which is enough for the cats to toast their botties on.
They've also brilliant if you have endometriosis/period pain/back pain, etc too

Fleeces for sofas and bed covers cat bed, chairs, plus a fleecy, hooded dressing gown is going to be a big help in keeping you warm and is very easy to wash and fast-drying too, as are thermal tops, thermal vests and thermal leggings.

Those self-healing cat pads ( about £7 on Amazon) are great too . I have them for my cats and use them when I sit outside on the patio. Also very easy care laundry wise.

Plastic film on your conservatory windows may also help(?)

Ginger tea will get you warmed up.from the inside.

Good luck settling in and best wishes to you and yours.

*self-heating cat lads ...bloody autocorrect

*pads

To all those struggling with the cold, we invested in a decent dehumidifier last year and I have felt so much warmer even with the heating off. If you have misted up windows etc/get cold clammy feet then have a look at getting one if you can afford it. They don't cost much to run and help massively with drying the washing too without making the house damp. Since we got ours I can actually layer up and get warm, before I just felt chilled and clammy no matter what I wore. They also blow out very slightly warmed air so we find that running ours raises the temp of the house a little. Also go for REAL wool jumpers/socks/layers (check vinted/charity shops) it keeps you so, SO much drier and warmer. Agree about the Dreamland Alaskan Husky heated blanket, it's one of the best things we own. We use it constantly instead of the heating, especially when the kids are in bed, it's pennies to run and genuinely a lifesaver - OP if you have family that buys you a christmas gift could you maybe request a contribution towards one? I really feel for you OP, hope you feel warmer soon 💐

One thing I didn't say in my earlier post that I wish I had is how sorry I am that you're in this position.

Yes, there are practical things you can do to improve your situation, but it's also terrible that you and so many others don't have the simple option of just heating your home to an adequate level.

How old are your DC? One cold winter will not shape their childhood in the same way that being cold every single winter would. Our heating broke one winter when our DC were small and we couldn't afford to fix it and couldn't afford to run plug in heaters for more than a few hours a day. I remember putting them to sleep on top of folded secondhand double duvets, with two more duvets on top of them. (Old camping truth: 1 layer underneath = 2 on top!) Then our immersion heater also died and I had to bath the children in a plastic tub on the kitchen floor until that could be fixed. In a house with no central heating! They remember those times fondly(!)

Thank you for all the comments :)
It's nice to know I'm not the only one!
I think the guilt of leaving a warm, financially stable home is hard to process.
But I know that being abit cold for a few months is better than living with abuse.
So I'm trying to be as positive and proactive as I can! My little girl thinks it's hilarious when we get dressed under the duvet and they will never say no to a nice hot chocolate and duvet day!
I don't have the funds to buy all the suggestions straight away but I am going to prioritise a few things and get second hand wherever possible,
I've also asked for a heated throw for Christmas from family!
The sun is shining here today so that always helps :) xx 💋 thanks again

The little plug on oil heaters don't use a lot of electricity. They take the chill off a room if you can't afford to put the gas CH on. An electric blanket is good too for warming the bed before you get in.

I have fitted my sofas with standard single electric blankets and out throws over them. They are brilliant, say watching the tv now and I'm toasty warm and it's pennies per hour. Even fifteen minutes every hours is plenty with a nice fleece blanket on top.

I just wanted to say you are an extraordinary woman and mum. You have achieved so much and been so strong to get yourself and your children to this point. Easy for me to say I know, but you have absolutely nothing to feel guilty for - it was your ex who made your warm home an unsafe place for you and the children. Any guilt lies entirely with him. Your children are very, very lucky to have a Mum like you.

Now I'm crying! Thankyou ❤️❤️❤️❤️
What a kind message!
I've bought a radiator key and just bled the radiators..
When I left my ex I was too anxious to even put petrol in a car..
Abit of cold is better than a life of misery 😍

You have found so much courage. I'm so sorry you are in this position, and wish I could wave a magic wand and warm your house up, but what you have given your kids is so, so much more by getting out. I really admire you. Good luck OP x

How do you dry your washing? We have a heated airer in which warms the rest of the room a bit and costs 10p a day.

Also portable bar heater to heat up one room instead of having all the heating on.

Heating didn't work in my bedroom all last winter and I had to heat it up with the bar heater for a few hours before bed otherwise the sheets felt damp and I was too cold to sleep.

Aww honey, were the radiators full of air? That should help keep a bit of heat in the house.

Your definitely better in a safe cold house than a warm unsafe one. Stay strong 💪 your kids will thank you for it.

How old are your children?
You could all sleep in one bedroom so your heating one smaller space

I couldn't do two of them because the valve is a different shape but I'm going to look for a different key online!!
I'm hoping once they are all done it will
Help! My parents have a small oil heater they are going to lend me to put in the kids room! That seems to be one of the coldest rooms!

I use an old tumble dryer but only once a week, it's a massive one so I get 2/3 loads of washing in and dry it all at the same time!
I worked out it costs about £1.50 but worth it not to have damp clothes hanging around as I'm pretty sure that would make the problem even worse!

I really appreciate the support x

Use the thermostatic valves on the radiators if you have them.
And calculate carefully the cost of running heaters, heated blankets etc vs the cost of running the central heating.

Can anyone recommend cosy slippers as I've put my Oodie on but my feet are cold in my slippers!

Some of the valves have broken :( they just keep turning round and round!
I know I need to get a plumber to come and have a look but .. well.. I can't afford that atm!

YouTube might have videos to help with the radiators ?

Btw I grew up in a very cold house and it was actually character building, no need to feel guilty at all :)