The Friendly Frugaleers Keep on Chatting (and having babies!)

[WreckTangled]

New thread, everyone welcome!

Car seat sounds like a great idea, and definitely in the steam with you. Well done there.

I’m a bit annoyed I didn’t think of it to be honest. Such a simple idea. I was wracking my brains trying to work out how to keep him upright (ish) and not hold him while I showered.

I’m so glad dh is coming home. I would have never asked him to come home (unless it was an absolute emergency) but I am so so glad he is doing it.

Ds is sleeping. In the car seat. I have showered. And washed my hair. Hooray! And I’m dressed. And am now sat on the couch. With a fruit plate and the worlds largest cup of tea.

As soon as dh comes Home and I’ve had lunch I’m going to go back and nap on bed.

Em rub the snufflebabe into your chest, that way he can get vapours while he’s feeding/snuggled. Poor wee lad. Car seat in bathroom is a great idea. We actually keep a bouncy chair in the bathroom at all times when our babies are/were small. DD2 can now climb out of it so it’s being put away but it was an absolute godsend and the only way I could get a shower.

lily will try that later although I’m feeling a bit snuffly now myself so maybe it’ll help me...

I’m kicking myself and feeling a bit guilty as he’s sounded snuffly (although not to this extent) for he last week. If it is something rather than nothing I’m going to have to take myself off to the “Mummy market” and replace myself. Hah!

Mummy market is the place a friend threatens her kids with when they say she’s a “mean mummy” or they hate her. She tells them that once you go to Mummy market you can’t choose your new Mummy. You get given one. And she could be worse..::

Aw hope he's soon better Em.

Had a much needed morning out with DD. £8 on lunch. She's now playing in the garden and I am sitting watching her with no coat on! It's a beautiful day.

Em I'd forgotten that for a time it would have been useful to have had a bouncy seat or secondhand car seat in lots of rooms so Ds would have had a place to sit up and watch me get on with things. It's so handy to be able to have free hands.

I second the bouncy seat in the bathroom. We've actually got one upstairs and one downstairs so I can pop DD into it when I need the loo or need both hands to help DS (this saved my sanity over the summer when I had DS toilet training and needing help dressing /undressing every 30 mins and DD who needed to be upright and vomited all the time). I also learned to sleep upright as I still mostly have to hold DD in the night - it sucks but I don't ask DH to help at night in the week because he has to work (he is pitching in a lot with DS and is knackered, poor thing). It's not great sleep though.

As DD is now 4 months old I am thinking of starting sleep training. She's going to need some drastic measures as she cannot self settle all and has literally every nap and at least half of her night sleep upright on me still. It is driving me demented, especially with DS to look after. If he needs the loo while she's sleeping I have to put her down, she wakes up, she screams for a bit and all nap routine is lost.... I think if she could self settle and nap on her own her routine would click, including feeds. Advice is to not do any tough love sleep training until they are at least 4 months and attachment is established. So it's a possibility now.... I just need time to research it and energy to steel myself as it's quite draining, if I remember DS's sleep training correctly! I am quite motivated though as I am averaging 3 hrs sleep per night and seldom get the chance to nap in the day. 💤

Ocado coming later, over £100 again.

Christmas I hear you on the sleep training. DD2’s sleep is just ridiculous. She won’t sleep in her cot and basically won’t sleep at all at night unless she’s on the boob. Won’t take a dummy. Total nightmare. I’m considering hiring a sleep coach as I’m at a total loss!

Christmas I sleep trained dd from about 4 months, I know its frowned upon on here but honestly it was the best thing I could have done. I honestly believe helping babies/children learn how to sleep is as important as teaching them how to walk or talk. I used to set an egg timer and pop back every 5-10mins to reassure her, I also had an established bedtime routine. Tbh it took a few weeks but I rarely had to go back in to her more than a couple of times.

So have been to Sainsburys, spent £38 which was clothes and Christmas gifts mostly and also popped into The Range and spent £23, £10 of that was on 40 sachets on cat food.

Feel a bit more on top of Christmas, dd is now pretty much done as is niece and nephew. Just need to get my mum and dad a couple of bits and thats me done.

I agree Girlie, I sleep trained DS at just over 4 months (similar situation then with wanting to be held). We had one awful evening and then he was great! A few setbacks if his routine was disturbed e.g. By illness or jetlag, but basically a good result. I just can't remember whose scheme we followed.

LLL I sympathise, how old is your DD? I think it is tough embarking on sleep training when there are other children in the house as you don't want everyone awake! I am definitely going to do it though.... 😬

I had a bouncy baby seat and ( this is so frowned on these days) a baby walker ( one of thise things on wheels you sit tjem in) as a single mum with no support at all it saved my life !! Ds walked well before first birthday months so i dont think it did him any harm

I also co slept and carried him around in a baby backpack.. ( tbf i only got the last because we lived in a hilly town with cobbled streets . I think the shaking in the buggy was worse) but it was great as it had an intregal floor stand so if he was asleep when i took it off i could leave him in it for a while

That's interesting that so many babies need to be held day and night. I had so many people on my case to sleep train DS. Fortunately I didn't as he couldn't breath unless I was holding him. That would not have gone well. Good luck there with sleep training dd Christmas. It sounds as though you'll be glad to get some sleep yourself.

He wouldnt settle in a cot so slept with me until he was abou 18mths old when he got his first 'big boys' bed
Also i could feed at night easier. Of course as i was on my own it wasnt a problem.

He moved into his bed without a fuss either. Maybe i was lucky..

Basically all that now seems to be frowned on i did !!! But hes survived to be a strapping gert big adult..

DD1 only napped on me for ages then one day I was desperate for the loo so put her in the cot and she was fine after that but I lost my excuse to sit and read/watch TV for half the day.
Obviously both twins can't sleep on me so they've had to cope on their own from day 1. They are usually fine but struggling with naps this week and waking up super early (like 4am).
I think they're over tired not as tired as me but no point changing things tomorrow when the clocks go back the next day. We are trying to see that as an opportunity to change a few things and get a better routine rather than an excruciatingly early start on Sunday!

I'll be off to bed early tonight anyway.

I followed she who should not be named Gina Ford Christmas I don't agree with everything she says but some of her tips and the routine she advocates worked well for us. Some babies like routine and structure, i'm like that now and I would def not sleep well with someone sat near by bothering me

When i came home ddog had let herself out of the cat flap and was in the garden thats the second time she has done that, silly doggy! She can get back in through the cat flap but has seemingly forgotten this

Dh has felt the brunt of ds this afternoon. He cane home and Decided he needed a nap for a couple of hours. I put ds in his car seat and left them too it and have managed 2.5 hours or so quiet time/time on my own/napping.

Ds has screamed a bit and dh currently has him snuggled in. He is super snuffly. Dh thinks I’m being silly re the dr and to just let him get on with it (as we would ourselves if it's a cold) but even if that is what the dr says I’m after ideas to manage it/help Ds.

I’ve also made it very clear that I’m sleeping in the spare room tonight and dh is taking the night shift. He protested - his cold is a bit of a bad one to be fair- but I’ve put my feet down. I can’t wait until he is better. I need sleep now. So it’s either he takes ds for the night and let’s me sleep if ds and I go to my parents who will help us out. They’ve been itching for him to spend more time with them...

Laska I know just what you mean. All the advice changes all the time, but I think we all just do our best with what we have, the what we're told at the time.

I read recently about how the American Indians were deeply unimpressed by Western schooling because men from our schools couldn't go for days in hunger and thirst, and couldn't track, or hunt. It made me realise that if Ds was born in their culture, he would have very different expectations placed on him, and would probably somehow still cope. It amazes me that people are so flexible really.

Laska its ages since I've heard the word gert. Takes me back to living in Wiltshire as a. child.

As in: 'you gert idiot!' Or similar!

Afternoon. Definitely a fan of sleep training and routine and kids (at the correct time) self settling etc. I kind of agree with what snuggly said, even though I only have two and not twins so no where near as tough as her. There's 18 months between my 2, DD (the youngest) just had to get on with it as I was chasing after a toddler. She didn't know any different, so just fell into this easily. Plus I had no help whatsoever, DH was working all hours and no family of mine prepared to. I wouldn't have survived otherwise, and if I couldn't survive then no one was around ha ha!

girlie, I think dogs are like humans, some love social interaction, some are far more introspective. Both of mine would happily not really bother with other dogs. Ddog2 is pretty nervous, as he was attacked as a puppy and had his leg broken so he's likely to snap if another dog really doesn't give up! I would let her take it in her own time, praise for any interaction she is willing to make but don't force it. And maybe be brave enough to tell other owners this is the case, I do. That took a bit of time for me to do that, but it can really help the dog.

£11 on ice creams and coffee.
£15 Amazon, on an organiser for 2018. I've loads of stuff to plan next year.

Stunning day today here and we've been out most of the day. Dogs are exhausted. Home tomorrow, my friend has offered to cook tea, lovely friend.

girlie, gradual exposure as you say, perfectly common sense and sensible idea. No accidents is fab, she's really settling in easily! I think this little dog is going to be brilliant for your DD. Plus being able to be left is a MASSIVE bonus, believe me!

Menu planning to this degree has totally taken the cost of this holiday down. I'm just sorting my order for tomorrow to get home to.

I was born in the 70's & they stuck a whole rusk in my bottle at a week old. No sleep training needed. Dad never told mum what he'd done though so when she realised she'd had a whole nights sleep she thought I was dead. It's a wonder people my age survived.

£8 Aldi
£3 morrisons
£1.20 sains

Been invited to an over 40's health check 😭