an Ostentatiously Austere October...join here for a frugal month ahead!

[PeoniesforMissAnnersley]

All welcome to join the MN frugaleers for another month of recording our spends, frugal wins and frugal fails!

NSD = No Spend Day (let's have as many as possible!)

LSD = Low Spend Day

Thanks ohhelp and cool - great recipes! Want to go and make them NOW but still have vats of veggie curry and soup to get through first!

I have tried all sorts of ways to get them to help and when I said I would only pay a daily rate if they did their jobs only DD and DS2 did theirs. DS1 didn't care about the money and actually opted to pay his siblings to do his jobs. I did not like that.

I should not have to pay them to do their job, they should help.

Tonight DD refused to clear up some mess because she said DS1 made her spill it. I said I won't wash her clothes then as I haven't made them dirty. She said she will wash them then. I know she won't though and I can't be arsed with having to show her at the moment and making sure it is all done after sorting them out from everyone else's.

Their job chart is on the wall, they get a set amount each week, just do your flipping jobs without being asked!! They actually would rather have no money than help sometimes. Fuckers

When I did give them reduced pocket money they didn't care.

Change the wifi password

Spotty this is failsafe! On one occasion I changed DD's Club Penguin password as a last resort.

Itsfab - your kids sound v ungrateful. Mine are still young 6 and 4 but we all eat together. Granted it does mean that we all eat spag Bol but that's it.

Why don't you just get 7 days portions of chicken nuggets and chips for them? All frozen. And they can just sorted it for themselves. Or whatever their 'favourite' food is. Just do that. You then cook whatever you want for you and dh. So curries, stir fries etc.

They'll come round soon enough. Tough love!

If they would rather be without money then so be it. They will soon realise they need the money for bus, crap from boots, etc. just let them be without. They are old enough. Really. They won't die starving if they have nuggets and chips for a week. They may get bored and angry and refuse to eat... So be it.

I really wouldn't pander to them. I don't for my kids. There was once my son was about 3 and was having a massive tantrum. I threw him outside the house (garden) and locked the door. He could see us but I wouldn't let him in. 5 min. He was hysterical. He never did that again.

All screens have been confiscated from DS1 and DD. I have to let them have their lap tops back for homework but then I will take it back off them.

I know I have a real issue over the feeding thing. I was never in a position where I was able to ask for food. I was given it and expected to eat it and that was it. I never want my kids to go hungry. I know how stupid it is. They have never been denied food and have always known they will have plenty to eat. DD won't eat stuff now she used to eat and I think it is because I stopped making some of it. I know I felt awful when I was ill they ate fish finger type crap for a couple of weeks.

They get very little pocket money. They often spend it on the ice cream van, DS2 buys a comic and DS1 has spent this weeks on a game or something for his computer. They only get £4 a week and have to save one of those. They used to get more but I got fed up of the ingratitude. What annoys me is they have a fair amount in their bank accounts thanks to me insisting they save some so whenever they want something and they don't have enough from their weekly money they just airily say to get it from the bank. It is there with no effort from them.

To me cooking and feeding = love and that is stupid.

But if you provide the food and they refuse to eat, that's THEIR choice. Unless they have disabilities or SNs (both my dcs do), then it's a matter of simply not willing to eat. I try not to make things they actively dislike, or provide an alternative if I do, but other than that they need to make an effort to eat their meals. All hot meals are together at the table, and they must ask to be excused when they are done eating.

They are 5 and 8yo. Mind you, I could not get this done while I was still with stbx as he was uncooperative. Now it works very well.

My dd has to say 'thank you for my dinner mummy, please may I get down' before she can leave the table. She doesn't like any form of potato so get bread and butter as her carb sometimes

I know what you mean itsfab you just want them to be happy, of course you do, but the way they're acting is making you unhappy and that's not on. I will happily eat all of your home baked goods

If you like to bake, but don't want to let them see them as a reward for bad behaviour... put the baked goods in the freezer to eat another time.

Or in the post....

I totally get it that I can't serve up stuff they don't like and expect them to eat it but what annoys me is they will eat something one day and then when I make it again they decide they don't like it. I can't flipping keep up!

The only thing I have never had an issue is they always say thank you for my dinner, please may I get down?

Just had severe words. DS1 has told me 11 year old DD has an instagram account. She reckons it didn't ask her if she was 13 or over. Does any one know? My kids are not allowed any kind of internet presence for complicated reasons and I am livid she has lied. She mentioned about it the other day and I said I wasn't entirely sure what it was but she wasn't allowed on it. She said she didn't want an account .

Freezing baked goods is a good idea and I did once send two chocolate muffins to a mumsnetter. They weren't very complimentary . They said they would have been better sent the day they were made. They WERE! They were still flipping warm when I posted them.

Oh poor you some people are so rude!

You do have to be 13 for Instagram but I suspect it's just in the T&CS rather than a specific question. Not sure if I put my DOB in when registering.

It scares me how good they are on computers yet they don't understand the dangers. I can't have my children findable on line.

Nsd

OhHelp - could you give me the highlights please?

Can't believe this thread is on page 8 already!!

Have done alright this wend, spent £6.50 ystd on some pizza and chocolate as was doing an emergency dash to a friend who was feeling low.

Today went to a fun day where most of the activities were free I bought some ice creams £3 and drinks £1.50.

Not too bad.

This month I have to factor in a lot of bdays, both my brothers and two close friends.

Can't keep up with this, will read through later.

Just ordered dd's Xmas present. She wants a microscope which is anything between £70-£100 online. It was reduced on debenhams site today to £72, I then got a 10% discount voucher so it has come to £64.80. Every little helps....

Not sure if my post worked but £15.50 on dinner for me and DH, £15 on personalised Santa plate for DD.

at that rude MNer Itsfab, unbelievable.

NSD in the end. Will get shopping tomorrow.