Parents want me to do and kids to do covid test before visiting

[Needarest22]

AIBU for being a bit put out by this?
My brother is also visiting and he's really cautious about covid so it could be driven by him. There is no talk of them doing one.
AIBU to be a bit miffed?

Well yeah... it's hard to have mental health issues when you're dead because of Covid. I'll give you that 🤷‍♀️

@Pearl664 that is nice for you, that it was just that

i am fully vaccinated, boosted, generally fit and well and I was sick for 6 weeks, struggled with breathing and burning pain deep in my lungs. All within “normal” but would not wish that on someone older and less fit. It really knocked me for six.

it CAN really hit people. And not being hospitalised is a low benchmark

Most people I know over 55 found covid to be worse than a cold. If OP or her children had flu they probably be too ill to go and it's nowhere as near as infectious as covid anyway.

I'm sorry, that sounds awful. Perhaps I'm complacent because I know of very few people who've had covid in recent months and even my clinically vulnerable friend who has had 6 jabs was only mildly ill. I don't know anyone who is testing though.

Orchid220 I'm over 55 and my DH is in his 60s. Both had it very mildly. My clinically vulnerable friend who is in her mid 60s was mildly ill. While clearly some people get covid more seriously it's not my experience that since vaccinations that older people get more severe symptoms. But that's just my experience, others will have different experiences.

I would test if asked. But I wouldn't ask people to test even though we're the 'oldies' in our family and I don't know of anyone else testing.

I'm over 55 too. I didn't actually say serious symptoms. I said that they found it much worse than a cold. It may not have been worse than flu, but most people wouldn't visit relatives with flu would they? I don't ask people to test but most people do anyway because my friends and family actually like me and I'm vulnerable so they don't want to kill me.

It isn't "nothing more than a cold" for the vast majority of people at all. It is like a cold for some but many find it much worse- at least as bad as flu. Would you visit people if you knew you had flu?

They’ve said flu is the biggest thing to worry about this Christmas. If anyone is worried about getting ill, just dont invite guests over. Have a quiet Christmas, meet in spring for a celebration, go for a winter walk with family etc. You cant have it both ways-if you are paranoid about germs, dont invite everyone to sit in your living room for 3 days!

And let the rest of the population get on with enjoying themselves!

Flu is not as infectious as covid and people generally don't visit if they have it either.

Its actually worse than Covid…flu means you wouldn’t be able to pick up a £20 note off the floor lying in front of you. I’ve had it once and needed help to walk to the loo. Covid (in 2022) is pretty much a cold/cough/sore throat for the vast majority of people. I would respect the grandparents wishes by telling them there is flu/norovirus/strep a/covid everywhere and stay away if they are concerned. Its made the front of the newspaper today (think its The Times?), telling people to stay away from the vulnerable because of flu.

Except that said patient would be withholding the extent the anxiety and paranoia is having on them by excluding their reluctance to leave the house, the insistent mask wearing and the attempt to impose others to follow their rules.

No need to be so dramatic. Now the population is vaccinated covid deaths are exceptionally rare.

Yes, it is. Covid is a mild illness at best for the overwhelming majority of people no matter what your narrative is.

And like everything else, covid should be the same. If you feel well enough to go out and about, regardless of what illness you have, feel free to do so. If you don’t, don’t.

Either way your anxiety and paranoia about a mild illness are something you need to deal with, not try and make everyone else follow you down the rabbit hole.

Yes, COVID isn't the only illness around, but it has relevant rates of asymptomatic spreaders and easy enough testing (not 100% but false negative people are generally less contagious), so it seems like a reasonable step in a risk reduction.

And while it would be great if covid was just a minor cold, long covid is definitely a thing and tests are really easy way to reduce the risks as well.

In my area there are combined test for COVID+flu available, which helps even more.

My parents want us to do one, it's fair enough as three of us are in schools anyway.

I'm not sure it will be worth using the last 4 tests as I've come down with sinusitis today 🙄 so may cancel before that anyway!
If I'm miraculously well tomorrow we'll do a test Christmas morning.

I just wouldn't visit, not because I couldn't be bothered to test but if they are that anxious about Covid it wouldn't be very relaxing. And agree with others, whether or not you test positive doesn't mean you have or haven't got Covid or that it won't develop within the next day or two. If you have young children then the likelihood is that you have been in contact with some germs, viruses etc.

It wouldn't bother me in the slightest.

Who's doing that? Have I missed a post? (Genuine question)

We test before seeing our friend who has cystic fibrosis. I don't think it's unreasonable to ask people to do this if they have a health concern

Who are you to decide what "the overwhelming majority of people" experience? You don't know everyone. Many people have told me that they felt very ill. That doesn't mean hospitalised but ill enough to be to not want it again.

Totally agree.
I’ve had flu twice and I think people who think flu is just a heavier cold than usual clearly have never had it! I know exactly what you experienced. It’s truly dreadful - and I was weak and struggled for weeks after my dose too, despite being fit and well when I caught it. But no one called it ‘Long Flu’ I coughed until I retched, every joint ached, I couldn’t bear even the weight of a blanket on my body because of the discomfort and swung between boiling hot and chattering with cold.

On the other hand, I caught covid (in my late 50s and unvaccinated) and didn’t realise until my daughter suggested I test. I had a day of feeling a bit meh, a slightly snotty nose and nothing else. As for it being highly infectious, DH and I shared a bed and sat next to each other in a warm living room and he didn’t test positive until 5 weeks later! It’s either got a hell of an incubation period or he caught it from someone else. Tbh, I don’t think even the experts fully understand how the infection is transmitted.

Funnily enough, the majority of people I know who’ve had covid described it as a bit of a non event. One person’s idea/description of ‘really poorly’ can vary hugely from being under the weather to a full hospital job.

I find some of these replies really sad and shocking. You said your dad had a bad chest last year. Covid can really do one to peoples chests and it’s so easy for healthy people to be walking around symptom free, it’s just not worth it. I don’t bother testing regularly but I take 2 minutes out of my day to do a test when I’m seeing someone who might be impacted by covid. Testing isn’t fun but it’s over quickly and you forget about it, even if it’s not 100% at least you know you did everything you could! It’s buy a bloody test. If you have flu you likely know it but with covid you don’t always. Christmas is the season of good will, it’s your parents. Unless there’s a backstory I don’t understand why you wouldn’t want to just do one. If you’re out and about and have kids you’ve likely been exposed recently.

I've 3 small kids and had planned on testing before we went on Christmas day. Wouldn't bother me, my kids in creche and school and there is illness everywhere. It's a few minutes, gives a reassurance and I don't understand your attitude.

I've Covid now and I wouldn't wish this on anyone so even though I'm just out of isolation, I'm staying home. Do the test and keep your mam and dad reassured.