Would you comment on a non-mask wearer when in public?

[92miles]

If you passed a fit young person coming into a busy venue as you were exiting, and that person wasn't wearing a mask, would you say anything to them?

I wouldn't because you've got no way of knowing if that person is exempt. It is also possible the person does have a mask and had simply forgotten to slip it on. I think they will pretty soon notice others wearing masks and it will remind them if that's the case.

I've witnessed other people making comments to non mask wearers when in public though.

'When have I said I wet myself if something touches my face?!'

Oh sorry I thought you'd said a few times that if anything touches your face you pass out and wet yourself?

No, but when I see whole families or groups without them, I think they can't all be exempt.

Meanwhile, my varifocals are steaming up beyond belief and I can't see what I'm doing. The mask cause issues of spacial awareness for me in varifocals, especially going down stairs.

@middleager

No, but when I see whole families or groups without them, I think they can't all be exempt.

Meanwhile, my varifocals are steaming up beyond belief and I can't see what I'm doing. The mask cause issues of spacial awareness for me in varifocals, especially going down stairs.

And that is it isn't it. We all hate wearing them, glasses steam up, communication can be challenging etc. We all hate them! So to see others not bothering (barring those with serious and significant issues which would mean they'd be under the care of a medical team not just self diagnosed anxiety) is really annoying.

Anyway let's hope they'll be on the way out soon.

@JaniieJones

'When have I said I wet myself if something touches my face?!'

Oh sorry I thought you'd said a few times that if anything touches your face you pass out and wet yourself?

No. I've said that TN attacks can be so painful I sometimes lose consciousness. When I do, there have been occasions when I have lost control of my bladder and/or bowels, as anyone might if they lose consciousness. I've actually already explained as much on this thread, and to you previously.

I do not have an attack 'if anything touches my face'. Pressure, however slight, to my left temple/jaw/cheek/chin can trigger an attack (as can things like eating, applying makeup, talking, brushing my hair and so on). I do not wear a mask or visor because I do not want to risk another attack in public (I wore a mask on the bus in July last year and it triggered a flare which lasted for two weeks). The prospect of losing consciousness in public isn't one I relish, as I'm sure you can appreciate.

You often come onto mask threads and tell me that I wet myself if something touches my face. I explain that's not the case, but on the next mask thread, you say the same thing. Hopefully this fulsome explanation will put an end to your confusion once and for all

OK thanks for the clarification vampireswife, apologies if I'd misunderstood . Tbh you shouldn't be incontinent if passing out I'd ask for that to be looked into if I were you.

'Incidentally you've also previously said you've never met anyone with TN so you're clearly a bit confused this morning'

Ah well as I didn't know anyone who was incontinent if something caused severe facial pain I didn't think I did know anyone with tn, however a new diagnosis in the family a few weeks ago has actually identified other people we know who have tn and manage perfectly well. So not as rare as I'd thought after googling it! Bit of carbamazepine to manage flare ups, face covers on and off you go.

Most will. I don't know anyone with TN who can't wear a face cover. Obviously there may be rare extreme cases where people like you wet yourself if anything touches your face and you pass out as you have claimed previously but it certainly isn't the norm.

I have TN and any pressure on the right side of my face triggers an attack. I've tried wearing a mask, but physically can't, unless I want to end up on my knees in agony and also potentially shitting myself (which has happened before). No chance I'm going to put myself through that for anyone.

@JaniieJones

OK thanks for the clarification vampireswife, apologies if I'd misunderstood . Tbh you shouldn't be incontinent if passing out I'd ask for that to be looked into if I were you.

'Incidentally you've also previously said you've never met anyone with TN so you're clearly a bit confused this morning'

Ah well as I didn't know anyone who was incontinent if something caused severe facial pain I didn't think I did know anyone with tn, however a new diagnosis in the family a few weeks ago has actually identified other people we know who have tn and manage perfectly well. So not as rare as I'd thought after googling it! Bit of carbamazepine to manage flare ups, face covers on and off you go.

I was on carb for a while, then amitriptyline. We're now at the stage where surgery is required. As you are now so knowledgeable about TN (well done for getting up to speed in a matter of weeks!), you'll know that meds don't work indefinitely, that TN always gets worse over time, and eventually brain surgery is the only option.

I'm quite surprised that with the extensive medical background you have previously said you have, you didn't know all this about TN already? Or indeed that it's perfectly normal to be incontinent on losing consciousness? Perhaps your medical background isn't in neurology?

Not sure why you mention face covers in your last sentence. Again, with your medical background and new-found TN knowledge, you'll know that many people with TN can't tolerate them. Some find them useful for blocking cold winds, which can be a trigger for some TN sufferers, which again, I'm sure you'll know. Others can't tolerate the pressure, however light - which, like my GP and neurologist, you'll also know.

Oh, and it's not 'a bit of carbamazepine to manage flare ups' - it's three doses a day, indefinitely, which cause terrible side effects and cannot be tolerated by everyone. A bit more TN knowledge to add to your already impressive stack there!

[quote Blossom64265]@XenoBitch

did you not get that I was talking about myself being the crazy woman sobbing in the milk aisle or do you really not think we should be pushing ourselves to keep others safe?[/quote]
Sorry, I totally misread your post. Massive apologies.

@PhilCornwall1

Most will. I don't know anyone with TN who can't wear a face cover. Obviously there may be rare extreme cases where people like you wet yourself if anything touches your face and you pass out as you have claimed previously but it certainly isn't the norm.

I have TN and any pressure on the right side of my face triggers an attack. I've tried wearing a mask, but physically can't, unless I want to end up on my knees in agony and also potentially shitting myself (which has happened before). No chance I'm going to put myself through that for anyone.

It's such a bunch of bollocks isn't it.

Not helped by people basically calling you a liar/trying to catch you out on threads like this.

I wonder if they always question people with disabilities? Or claim to be experts on health conditions they evidently know nothing at all about in an effort to minimise the experiences of others?

Some people always minimise, claim to be experts and don't believe others. You only need to look at blue badge and disability benefit threads for that. It will be the same posters. Masks are only the latest target.

Not helped by people basically calling you a liar/trying to catch you out on threads like this.

I'm happy for anyone to stand in front of me so they can see what happens. They might not enjoy it, but they'll then know it's real.

Since apparently we wear masks because we are protecting others and oh so compassionate, how about applying some of that same compassion to those who genuinely can’t wear masks? Some of the posts on here are just awful.

@Spikeyball

Some people always minimise, claim to be experts and don't believe others. You only need to look at blue badge and disability benefit threads for that. It will be the same posters. Masks are only the latest target.

Yep.

The level of absolute nonsense in this thread from people under the impression they can identify exemption from looking is laughable. Smoking, omnipresent TAs, hastily googled conditions, people whose friends in Toronto apparently speak for the entire population... the list goes on.

For anyone who is still unclear of the effects of a TN attack:

Imagine having powerful electric shocks suddenly, out of nowhere and with no warning, in your face. In between each shock there's a sensation of burning, as if your cheek or jaw is actually on fire. There is no pain like it - not childbirth, not a tooth abscess, not the pain of RA, nothing (and this is backed up by neurologists, it's not just my perception).

Remember that this pain comes on completely out of the blue. There can be triggers, but equally it can happen spontaneously. You're walking around Sainsbury's, say, and suddenly you're having electric shocks in your face. The sheer unexpectedness of it means you drop what you're holding/scream/sink to your knees as @PhilCornwall1 describes. That's mortifying enough, but if the pain continues for more than a few seconds, which it usually does, you can lose consciousness.

Shop staff then call an ambulance because if someone screams and keels over in your shop, that's what you do. They also have to clean up any mess you've left. Paramedics arrive, you explain the situation, they may take you in and give you the serious hardcore pain relief you can only get in hospital (although it's worth remembering that for neurological pain, things like opiates don't work). If you don't lose consciousness, you still have to find your way home while in the throes of an attack. Then you have to hope and pray that it's an isolated attack and not the start of a flare, which can go on for weeks and can mean hundreds of attacks a day, with no pain relief.

Now imagine knowing that this will never get better or go away and will only get worse over time. The meds you're on don't halt it and don't stop all attacks and eventually, they won't work anyway. Then your only option is brain surgery, the results of which vary immensely (from a few months to a few years relief). But it always comes back. The surgery with the best outcome is very invasive and carries a 1 in 100 risk of death, and a higher still risk of stroke/paralysis/loss of speech.

That's TN. That's what people with TN live with. And most of us can't wear face coverings because triggering an attack - or worse still, a flare - in public is an absolutely terrifying thought.

When people with TN tell you they can't wear a mask because they're doing everything they can to avoid the risk of an attack, believe them.

It sounds very difficult and there’s no way I’d expect someone with a condition such as that to try to wear one.

I'm sure some 'expert' will be along in a moment with a passive aggressive comment about how awful it must be, but it doesn't affect their friend/family member like that, and maybe I should talk to my neurologist, and 'pop on a mask and off you go!'. With a sarcastic , just to show they care.

'Some people always minimise, claim to be experts and don't believe others. You only need to look at blue badge and disability benefit threads for that. It will be the same posters'

I absolutely support blue badges and disability benefits. I have a disabled relative I know the reams of actual evidence required to receive both.

Some of the comments on here are much more upsetting than seeing the occasional maskless face!

@TheVampiresWife

For anyone who is still unclear of the effects of a TN attack:

Imagine having powerful electric shocks suddenly, out of nowhere and with no warning, in your face. In between each shock there's a sensation of burning, as if your cheek or jaw is actually on fire. There is no pain like it - not childbirth, not a tooth abscess, not the pain of RA, nothing (and this is backed up by neurologists, it's not just my perception).

Remember that this pain comes on completely out of the blue. There can be triggers, but equally it can happen spontaneously. You're walking around Sainsbury's, say, and suddenly you're having electric shocks in your face. The sheer unexpectedness of it means you drop what you're holding/scream/sink to your knees as @PhilCornwall1 describes. That's mortifying enough, but if the pain continues for more than a few seconds, which it usually does, you can lose consciousness.

Shop staff then call an ambulance because if someone screams and keels over in your shop, that's what you do. They also have to clean up any mess you've left. Paramedics arrive, you explain the situation, they may take you in and give you the serious hardcore pain relief you can only get in hospital (although it's worth remembering that for neurological pain, things like opiates don't work). If you don't lose consciousness, you still have to find your way home while in the throes of an attack. Then you have to hope and pray that it's an isolated attack and not the start of a flare, which can go on for weeks and can mean hundreds of attacks a day, with no pain relief.

Now imagine knowing that this will never get better or go away and will only get worse over time. The meds you're on don't halt it and don't stop all attacks and eventually, they won't work anyway. Then your only option is brain surgery, the results of which vary immensely (from a few months to a few years relief). But it always comes back. The surgery with the best outcome is very invasive and carries a 1 in 100 risk of death, and a higher still risk of stroke/paralysis/loss of speech.

That's TN. That's what people with TN live with. And most of us can't wear face coverings because triggering an attack - or worse still, a flare - in public is an absolutely terrifying thought.

When people with TN tell you they can't wear a mask because they're doing everything they can to avoid the risk of an attack, believe them.

All I can say to this is, believe what is written, because it's true.

It's not called the Suicide Disease for nothing.

"I absolutely support blue badges and disability benefits. I have a disabled relative I know the reams of actual evidence required to receive both."

I have seen plenty of posts where people state that only certain disabilities count. I have had people tell me that my son shouldn't have a blue badge because he doesn't have a physical disability ( although people with actual knowledge have decided that he should have high rate mobility). Those who cannot wear masks tend to do so because of invisible disabilities or conditions and invisible disabilities are the ones people like to take a pop at/ think everyone with that condition is the same/ don't believe exist.

@MrsDeaconClaybourne

Some of the comments on here are much more upsetting than seeing the occasional maskless face!

Indeed.

Some posters have really shown themselves up to be ignorant, lacking in understanding and/or empathy, as they do on every mask thread.

They've also proven themselves to be telling fibs with their 'I know someone with XYZ condition and they're fine' line - for example, nobody goes from TN diagnosis to taking meds and managing the condition within a few weeks. TN drugs take months to work, and there's no guarantee they do even then.

Bit of a Dr Google fail there!

If you come anywhere near me and comment I’m willing to bet you will regret it when I’ve given you a mouthful as my past experiences are horrible and PTSD so anything over my face would be extremely traumatic For me but I dare you to approach me??

Other than mumsnet full of lies and dreadful comments on here where in real life it’s not likely to happen lol no one has Approached me and I’ve always been treated with respect.

*Indeed.

Some posters have really shown themselves up to be ignorant, lacking in understanding and/or empathy, as they do on every mask thread.

They've also proven themselves to be telling fibs with their 'I know someone with XYZ condition and they're fine' line - for example, nobody goes from TN diagnosis to taking meds and managing the condition within a few weeks. TN drugs take months to work, and there's no guarantee they do even then.

Bit of a Dr Google fail there!*

All of this.

I cannot believe well I can because it's Mumsnet that people are that sad and pathetic over MASKS that they post on these masks citing examples of people they know with various medical conditions who still wear masks. It really does show a tremendous amount of ignorance, lack of sensitivity, and utterly 'selfish' (I fucking hate that word after all the 'selfish' threads on here), if they really think people who have genuine reason to not wear masks should still be wearing them. Just get a bloody life and stop judging other people just to feel superior yourselves.

I guess some people have always wanted to criticise others, particularly others within the UK as there are always posters guaranteed to go on about how useless the general public here have been with masks/restrictions in comparison to other countries (despite plenty of evidence which points to the contrary). It really is sad. What will they find to criticise once the pandemic is over I wonder. They'll need to find something specific to fill the pandemic shaped hole in their lives, I'm sure.

No absolutely not. I'm not a nazi.

[quote TheVampiresWife]@DickMabutt73962 whatever your friend says, exemptions exist in Toronto in law. Five in 1000 people suffer from trigeminal neuralgia, for example. There are almost three million people in Toronto. Going by the statistics, that's a fair whack of people with TN, the majority of whom will be unable to wear a face covering of any sort. And that's just one condition which may require exemption.

Exemptions exist, people will need to use them, and shame on any business owner who refuses service (unlawfully) to a disabled person.[/quote]
I'm sure they do exist, she just said that people have argued and still been denied. I support exemptions btw, but definitely found the difference staggering compared to London re mask wearing so it made me wonder