Has everyone just accepted that it’s not an “if” but a “when”?

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Just that really. Me and DH are still trying to be relatively careful, we do meet up with people and do things but we are avoiding certain things eg not going to soft play with DDs this week as it would have been full of school kids. Our eldest goes to a childminder who has school age kids so she could very well catch it that way (or from the supermarket etc) but we need childcare to work. So basically we are not completely “hiding away” but we are thinking carefully and not taking risks when there’s no huge benefit.

Are we alone in this approach now? And is there any point? Part of me thinks we aren’t going to be able to avoid it forever so we may as well just get it and then we could get on with our lives. People I know who’ve had it are now just doing whatever they want (although I know you can get it twice) which sounds quite appealing.

For anyone interested, my reasons for still trying to avoid it despite being double jabbed are 1. I have a rare blood clotting condition so although I’m not CEV I am classed as being higher risk than average joe and 2. DD2 is only 6 months, she is EBF and hasn’t taken well to solids yet and has some allergies. I’m worried that if I get it now and feel totally wiped out that my supply will suffer and I’d be exhausted trying to breastfeed her while feeling really poorly etc.

I think it's probably "when" not "if" in terms of getting exposed, but I think it still makes sense to take certain precautions and to be selective about risks: why be in a hurry to get it? Also, since there's enough evidence people can get it multiple times, why not keep that frequency down by continuing to take some precautions?

It's a mistake to say that the only options are to and live exactly as before, or alternatively to go to the other extreme and be fearful all of the time. There is a happy medium that involves taking some precautions, avoiding some high-risk situations, and then getting on with life and having the interactions and experiences that are most important to you.

It's a funny one. I've worked throughout, socialise loads, three kids in school who have gone throughout on keyworker places, three different settings.
I've never worried about catching it...no more than I worry about catching anything else. My husband's had it and my son, on separate occasions but to the best of my knowledge I never have.
I've had both jabs but so had my husband when he caught it. (He's 45, overweight, had a mild cough and recovered inside a week). I never kept away from either of them, just carried on as normal. Just as I clean up my kids' sick without a thought and nurse my husband when he has any other bug.
I have no fear of it...my far greater fear throughout is how much freedom people rush to give up because of an airborne virus. It's set a terrible precedent...how much living will people give up to prevent dying? And how many children (such as Arthur Labinjo -Huhes and Star Hobson) were abandoned to their fate while people kidded themselves they could dodge a virus by hiding away. Non mask wearers selfish...no, it's the people who knew the risk to the vulnerable in society from lockdown yet begged for it anyway from misplaced fear.
Yet still people decry others for leaving the house with a cough! There are so many ways we can leave this mortal coil...if you are younger than 75 and relatively healthy it's vanishingly unlikely to be covid. And if you're over that age...well then it could be any cause at all that takes you. I know my parents just want to see their family and travel as much as they can while they can.

I'm resigned to it. I'm seeing people, going out and about but avoiding very crowded places, I'm still having shopping delivered but will go into shops if I run out of things. I've had 2 jabs plus booster so hopefully when I get it it will be mild. Fingers crossed.

why not keep that frequency down by continuing to take some precautions?

Because people value the cost to them of those precautions more than the resulting benefit of slightly reducing their risk of catching covid, probably. As they do with precautions for every other disease.

If you and all your housemates are willing to live with all the trade-offs, it was and will remain possible for most people to avoid covid forever. But the longer it drags on, the more apparent it is that most people aren't willing to live with all those trade-offs for themselves and their children. Is it possible to quit one's job and find one that's entirely remote? Maybe, but often not at the same pay or in the same field, and many people like their jobs. Failing that, is it possible to not work at all? Probably, though living entirely off of benefits is often unpleasant. Is it possible for your children to be exclusively homeschooled or in an online program, and never interact with other children? Sure. Is that the best thing for those children? Probably not.

No one can tell you what the right answer is for your family. But if you're not willing to live this way long-term, then you'll need to accept that you'll be exposed to covid sooner or later.

And yes, seems like it’s always going to be around and circulating so chances are I’ll encounter it repeatedly. Maybe my immune system will swat it aside, maybe I’ll technically have it but asymptotically, maybe I’ll get ill sometimes, but chances are low I’d get severely ill, so I am not really that bothered by the prospect. Certainly not enough to limit my life to reduce my own already-tiny risk even further.

@JudesBiggestFan

It's a funny one. I've worked throughout, socialise loads, three kids in school who have gone throughout on keyworker places, three different settings. I've never worried about catching it...no more than I worry about catching anything else. My husband's had it and my son, on separate occasions but to the best of my knowledge I never have. I've had both jabs but so had my husband when he caught it. (He's 45, overweight, had a mild cough and recovered inside a week). I never kept away from either of them, just carried on as normal. Just as I clean up my kids' sick without a thought and nurse my husband when he has any other bug. I have no fear of it...my far greater fear throughout is how much freedom people rush to give up because of an airborne virus. It's set a terrible precedent...how much living will people give up to prevent dying? And how many children (such as Arthur Labinjo -Huhes and Star Hobson) were abandoned to their fate while people kidded themselves they could dodge a virus by hiding away. Non mask wearers selfish...no, it's the people who knew the risk to the vulnerable in society from lockdown yet begged for it anyway from misplaced fear. Yet still people decry others for leaving the house with a cough! There are so many ways we can leave this mortal coil...if you are younger than 75 and relatively healthy it's vanishingly unlikely to be covid. And if you're over that age...well then it could be any cause at all that takes you. I know my parents just want to see their family and travel as much as they can while they can.

“And how many children (such as Arthur Labinjo -Huhes and Star Hobson) were abandoned to their fate while people kidded themselves they could dodge a virus by hiding away. Non mask wearers selfish...no, it's the people who knew the risk to the vulnerable in society from lockdown yet begged for it anyway from misplaced fear.”

I could not agree more. Well said.

It's a mistake to say that the only options are to and live exactly as before, or alternatively to go to the other extreme and be fearful all of the time. There is a happy medium that involves taking some precautions, avoiding some high-risk situations, and then getting on with life and having the interactions and experiences that are most important to you.

Completely agree with this!

@GoldenOmber

why not keep that frequency down by continuing to take some precautions?

Because people value the cost to them of those precautions more than the resulting benefit of slightly reducing their risk of catching covid, probably. As they do with precautions for every other disease.

Some people do.

A lot of people still take precautions.

Up till 22 October, 8 in 10 (82%) adults reported they wore a face covering when outside their home in the past seven days and 84% adults felt that social distancing from others not in their household was either very important or important.

@LilyPond2

It's a mistake to say that the only options are to and live exactly as before, or alternatively to go to the other extreme and be fearful all of the time. There is a happy medium that involves taking some precautions, avoiding some high-risk situations, and then getting on with life and having the interactions and experiences that are most important to you.

Completely agree with this!

yes

Up till 22 October, 8 in 10 (82%) adults reported they wore a face covering when outside their home in the past seven days and 84% adults felt that social distancing from others not in their household was either very important or important.

And do you think this reflects the actual behaviour of 82% and 84% of the population?

“ It's a mistake to say that the only options are to and live exactly as before, or alternatively to go to the other extreme and be fearful all of the time. There is a happy medium that involves taking some precautions, avoiding some high-risk situations, and then getting on with life and having the interactions and experiences that are most important to you.”

I agree that it doesn’t have to be a binary, but on the other hand the interactions and experiences that are most important to many people are also likely to be some of the most high risk situations in terms of catching or transmitting covid. Everyone is comfortable with their own decisions, but many people still fall foul of the “SELFISH!” accusations because they make different decisions to others.

Up till 22 October, 8 in 10 (82%) adults reported they wore a face covering when outside their home in the past seven days and 84% adults felt that social distancing from others not in their household was either very important or important.

Who did they ask.....?
We went to a huge shopping centre today and not even 20% had masks. Not that I mind, we didn't either. And even Less than that cared about distancing. It's been the same in most places I have been for ages now.

82% & 84% is complete bullshit. I haven’t seen anyone socially distancing since May. Literally no-one. There is no way on Earth 84% remain socially distancing 🤣 absolutely not. Maybe in the 75+ age group but I recon it’s like 1% in the under 40’s! Have you been anywhere this half term or summer holidays? Or indeed anytime?!

I’d say mask wearing is about 40% where I live. Up until recently, lower. But I am noticing more people are putting them on again. It’s noticeable. But still a minority.

@OliveTree75

Up till 22 October, 8 in 10 (82%) adults reported they wore a face covering when outside their home in the past seven days and 84% adults felt that social distancing from others not in their household was either very important or important.

Who did they ask.....?
We went to a huge shopping centre today and not even 20% had masks. Not that I mind, we didn't either. And even Less than that cared about distancing. It's been the same in most places I have been for ages now.

It’s hard to know without a link to the actual source, but if the question was “did you wear a mask at any time during the last seven days” then it would be answered yes by everyone from those who wear one outdoors all the time to those who only wear one where mandated (eg if they had been to the doctor’s surgery for some reason). I can well believe that that many adults have worn one on at least one occasion in the past seven days.

Most people prefer people to keep their distance, it’s always been that way. No one loved the crushed commuter trains unless they were an actual pervert

Now that I'm just a couple of weeks off being eligible for a booster I am being pretty cautious, having read that immunity from jabs may wane significantly after 5 months or so, but that the early signs are that boosters provide a high level of protection. DC are away at uni and DH also wants to take a cautious approach. I can understand why people who are already at very high risk of being exposed to Covid (eg because they have school age children) take a different approach.

My parents who are in their eighties are sadly living a much more restricted life than pre-pandemic, but I don't think their approach is irrational given their age.

Student DC are not restricting their lives due to Covid concerns. I think DD would still wear a mask in shops (out of a belief that it's the right thing to do). DS is on year abroad in a country with much lower Covid rates. Mask wearing still mandatory in indoor public places where he is.

@Bobholll

82% & 84% is complete bullshit. I haven’t seen anyone socially distancing since May. Literally no-one. There is no way on Earth 84% remain socially distancing 🤣 absolutely not. Maybe in the 75+ age group but I recon it’s like 1% in the under 40’s! Have you been anywhere this half term or summer holidays? Or indeed anytime?!

I’d say mask wearing is about 40% where I live. Up until recently, lower. But I am noticing more people are putting them on again. It’s noticeable. But still a minority.

It's from the ONS, which is the best source of covid data that we have, hope that helps x

OP same as you.

@GoldenOmber

Up till 22 October, 8 in 10 (82%) adults reported they wore a face covering when outside their home in the past seven days and 84% adults felt that social distancing from others not in their household was either very important or important.

And do you think this reflects the actual behaviour of 82% and 84% of the population?

Well, personally I don't wear a mask 99% of the time. I imagine most of these people likewise don't wear a mask in the open air etc, but probably wear one in a crowded indoor space, which might be only for 10 or 20 minutes in a pharmacy or supermarket etc.

And likewise, I distance from people not in my household if in a queue etc, as it is polite, especially in the current situation, where at all possible.

So yes, I can easily believe that over 80% people are wearing masks in some situations, and are giving other people space where they can.

And that is what seems to be happening in my village, pretty much.

It's from the ONS, which is the best source of covid data that we have

When the best source we have is spitting out numbers that anyone with eyes can see are wildly wrong, that's not very reassuring.

I am being cautious to an extent. For example, I went to an event I really wanted to go to last weekend. The weekend before I turned down an invite to an engagement I would have normally liked to have attended but not as much as the one I didnt turn down. Basically I decide whether an occasion is worth getting covid at.
I'm not going to hide away from things I would really enjoy just to get it on the bloody train.

OP I’m in the same situation - blood clot condition, high risk, young kids. In your situation I would absolutely be careful and make sure if you get covid it’s after your booster. The last time I had a bad respiratory virus and immunothrombosis, it took me a year to recover and that wasn’t even covid. I think the risks aren’t the same for us. It’s not weighing up whether we’re very ill with the virus (as those are who are immune compromised), it’s weighing up whether we want increased risk of getting clots and personally I absolutely don’t want that. I have school age kids and don’t have an option to be careful as my kids have to go to school, but in your situation, I would be careful as you have the option to be. Once we’re over this peak, the new anti viral drugs should make covid better for everyone.

But even the ONS survey you’re quoting doesn’t say that 84% of people actually are socially distancing from people not in their household. It reports below 40% saying they’re actually doing it.

So what you’ve got is a large proportion of people who would say “yes, I think that socially socially distancing from those not in my household is an important way to slow the spread of coronavirus, but no, I’m not personally doing it any more, because slowing the spread isn’t as important to me as it was and it isn’t worth staying 2m apart from everyone not in my household for.”

I haven’t seen a socially distanced shop queue since February, tbh.

@dilly123

Never been bothered by the virus itself.. just the impact of lockdowns that have made life very hard..

Never worn a mask, rarely used hand sanitizer except in a hospital. Never done a PCR or LFT... still only know less than a handful of people who have tested positive & none of those were that poorly.

I used to feel more worried about the virus but now more about lockdowns and restrictions

I do sometimes wear a mask but not always (and not for me really)

We’ve had it in the household now and I’m relieved to be on the other side