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Original poster

AIBU not attending kids party

38 replies

WhatNowWorld · 04/08/2021 13:01

My BIL (husbands brother) has covid at the moment, he is fine - young (mid 30s), double jabbed, healthy etc. He tested positive on Monday 26th July and has 3 kids plus a CEV wife.
Their isolation ends this coming Thursday (night).
On Friday we are all invited to my SIL (husbands sister) house for her 3 year old daughters birthday party.

I messaged my CEV SIL to ask how they were and she said they were ok and happy to be out of isolation soon. I asked if the kids would need tests but she said no, not if they have no symptoms. I now feel really nervous that one of them has Covid with no symptoms and am scared about going to the party.
My 4 year old son will be playing (touching each other) with his cousins at the party (they all love each other and are very close). My son also loves his uncle (the one who has covid) and will cuddle/play fight with him.
I'm not too worried about my son getting it as it should be mild, I'm worried about it being passed to myself & my husband. We are double jabbed but the 2nd was less than 2 weeks ago for both of us. We have no health problems but my husband is overweight. I keep reading about people on their 30s & 40s dying now.
I want to suguest to my husband that none of us go to the party and we don't see them for at least another week to make sure no one in the household come out with symptoms - is this unreasonable?

We have been out & about as usual and I've been happy however I didn't know anyone personally who had Covid esp not someone so close to us (That BIL & SIL babysit for us a lot as the SIL loves kids and asks to see my son a lot).

I know the gov advice means they are doing the right thing (no tests after isolation) but its made me feel really uneasy. My husband will say I'm being overprotective/paranoid probably.
Maybe I should ask SIL who's party it is her thoughts?
Just wanted to get other peoples opinions.

OP posts:
Comedycook · 04/08/2021 13:05

I think you're being over cautious. You're double jabbed and not cev. If vaccinated people are reluctant to do things then I don't see how life will ever return to normal Confused

Original poster
WhatNowWorld · 04/08/2021 13:11

Thats exactly what I would have said as a response to this too. I don't know why I'm so scared all of a sudden! (I attended a small (but still a few hundred people) 1 day festival when I'd only had 1 jab.

Its the people dying in their 30s 40s that has scared me.

OP posts:
GreatBigBeautifulTommorow · 04/08/2021 13:16

Personally if it’s an indoors party I wouldn’t.

thinkfast · 04/08/2021 13:19

Would you feel more comfortable if they all did lateral flow tests the morning of the party?

User5827372728 · 04/08/2021 13:21

Eeerm i probs wouldn’t go to a party in someone’s house who’ve just had covid and stopped isolating the day before.

Leftphalange · 04/08/2021 13:22

When contact tracing (scotland) told us to isolate they also told us to get a PCR whether we had symptoms or not because we had been in contact.

Original poster
WhatNowWorld · 04/08/2021 13:22

@thinkfast yes I would which is why I asked if the kids would be having tests but she said no. I can't really ask them to can I.
I might get the opinion of my other SIL whose party it is.

OP posts:
Original poster
WhatNowWorld · 04/08/2021 13:23

Its not at their house, its at my other SIL house (its my husbands brother who has Covid and the party is at my husbands sisters house) but they will all be there.

OP posts:
MzHz · 04/08/2021 13:31

So your BIL got Covid - despite already having been double jabbed

You have only just had the second jab so won’t have max immunity

I wouldn’t go.
Vaccines haven’t stopped Long Covid. It’s best not to try and get it.

I’d save the mixing of people for more important things than a party. This isn’t necessary and with all the young kids, and the isolation ending the day before, it’s far too high a risk that someone will be asymptotic.

JamieLeeBee · 04/08/2021 13:32

You're not too worried about your child getting it because it should be mild... How do you know that then?

Mild or otherwise, I'd much rather I caught it myself than my kid.

hellcatspangle · 04/08/2021 13:33

I'm pretty relaxed but I wouldn't bother going to a party with people who've only come out of isolation the day before - simply because I know two people who've caught covid from someone past day ten of infection.

takemetocedarpoint · 04/08/2021 13:34

I wouldn’t go. At my karate club someone had covid recently and was due to train 4 days after isolation ended. But we all agreed it was better for for him to wait another week before coming back just in case (because we train in a smallish hall, lots of heavy breathing etc!). I would not want to go to someone’s house right after isolation ended tbh.

Original poster
WhatNowWorld · 04/08/2021 13:34

@MzHz yes correct.

Thats how I feel too.

OP posts:
Greenrubber · 04/08/2021 13:43

If I was as nervous as you I would ask them to reschedule it for next week to make you feel a bit better

We have covid in our house at the moment and although our isolation is up soon we are going to continue it for a few more days just because I'm not going to test our DD her symptoms came and went early on but still after myself and husband had tested positive so we are going to make sure she has her own 10 day isolation period!

Greenrubber · 04/08/2021 13:45

I also would not be offended if a family or friend wanted to wait longer that is totally their decision their health

RoseRedRoseBlue · 04/08/2021 13:56

Posts like this perfectly illustrate the farcical nature of ‘Freedom Day’. Life is so far from ‘normal’ if this is the way people are thinking.

DufferMum · 04/08/2021 14:00

Oh FFS, enough of this nonsense! Go to the bloody party and stop boring everyone with this shit!

RoseRedRoseBlue · 04/08/2021 14:04

@DufferMum 👏👏👏

IceCreamAndCandyfloss · 04/08/2021 14:06

I wouldn’t either OP, especially as the others haven’t been tested and could still pick it up as it’s used to be 10 days not 14 so still possible.

Original poster
WhatNowWorld · 04/08/2021 14:06

Spoke to my husband, he agrees with me so we won't go. If we were 3 weeks post jab it would be different - I will be 1wk 1 day and husband will be 1.5wks.

Please be aware I'm not hiding away at home, just being cautious around a known positive case. I'll happily see them in just over a week if none of the others get symptoms. Its just that only 11 days after positive test feels a bit soon to me with no 2nd jab protection.
Sorted, thanks all.

OP posts:
123fushia · 04/08/2021 14:22

Good plan.
I am double jabbed, felt unwell, did 3LFTs in a week - all negative. Went for PCR after noticing that I couldn’t smell anything - positive result. SI and now, a week later am still coughing and uncomfortable.
You are right to be cautious.

stillsleeptraining · 04/08/2021 14:27

Why can’t you ask them to take tests? It’s perfectly reasonable.

IsabellesMissingSock · 04/08/2021 14:37

I wouldn't go. I am just getting over covid - it's mostly been mild but I still had to take 2 days off work and I am literally never off sick. One of my friends has been admitted to hospital with it, caught it around same time.

I'd had both jabs but was only a few days after my second when I got it.

I stayed away from a small party the day after my isolation ended just in case I had any residual covid hanging about. I think everyone welcomed me doing so, tbh.

Original poster
WhatNowWorld · 04/08/2021 14:54

I can't exactly ask them to take tests - they are attending the same party as me as guests. I feel it would be unreasonable to ask them all to test so that we can attend the party. If it was my party I would ask them to test though!

OP posts:
Mindymomo · 04/08/2021 15:30

I would do as you are doing. If it were my family that one person had been diagnosed with covid, I would do LFT before a family gathering. Perhaps your SIL could postpone it for another week, firstly to make sure BIL family is fully out of isolation and secondly more time after your second vaccination.