Covid in our family - when can we get support

[changinforquestin]

Name changed for this. DS is 8 and Covid positive on sat, DD is 13 months and neg but been very very ill since Sunday (temp 40 but comes down and back up with medicine), bad cough. chesty breathing. I don't think I am testing her 'deep' enough as it's hard with a tiny one.

DH 1 jab and neg, DD 6 is negative. I'm also neg but just started to feel awful, temp, shaky, cough, achy AWFUL! i usually Work ft from home and have had this week off to care for DD/DS, DH still working ft (consulting so doesn't get paid if doesn't work).

My question is this - if I get terribly unwell when could family potentially help? It is tough looking after all 3 kids while feeling unwell and was hoping that after a certain time period it would be safe for DM (2 jabs) to help. Obv without putting her at any risk!

Am so overwhelmed I was hoping someone here could advise. DH income very much needed at this time but obviously if he has to then he will need to take time out , just wanted to see options that are safe.

I really don't think you should put anyone outside of your household at risk, vaccinated or not. That is not a good idea. Your husband will have to miss work.

Your DH will have to look after all of you. If he goes down with it, you’ll just have to take it in shifts to parent/care and sleep/recover.

appreciate your responses thanks. Just wondering though with DS - if he then tests negative and no symptoms by his 10 days isn't he totally 'safe'?

He can leave isolation after ten days but you (and potentially your DH if he comes down with symptoms) will be a bit behind him. So I suppose there is little he can do if neither of you can leave the house to take him anywhere.

You all need to isolate.
DH will have to look after you and DC.

Please don’t put your DM at risk, vaccines aren’t 100%

Sorry to hear you are going through this, I can understand why you are feeling overwhelmed but I agree with previous posters, I don't think you can have anyone outside your household to help. I think it is possibly a case of you and your DH doing shifts.

Hopefully, another poster might be along who has experienced this and can offer some tips.

Also, if your DS has tested positive, I'm not sure your DH should be working outside the home. I would have thought he would have to self isolate. I thought one jab didn't give much protection. I'm no expert though but I thought if a member of the household tested postive, everyone had to self isolate. Maybe that has changed.

You poor thing. This will pass! But it's shit when you're knee deep in it and not sure how the next few days will pan out. Maybe focus on what you can do and who is well as a bonus. Hopefully DS will be on the up shortly, the baby too. In theory your DS might be ok to go stay at your mum's on Monday week. I'd be literally getting him to change clothes and sanatize between your house and your mum's car, then shower at hers. What age and how well is your mum? The 6 yr old may never be symptomatic. And is well able to spend days on the iPad and watching TV. It's tough, but it will pass.

Thanks all. Yes sadly I think you may all be right. This is simply awful.

DH is working from home - we all have isolated since a positive test in DS class on Friday.

Kind messages are making me tearful, I must be unwell as being so soft :)

www.gov.uk/government/publications/test-and-trace-support-payment-scheme-claiming-financial-support/claiming-financial-support-under-the-test-and-trace-support-payment-scheme

And yes I assume you are all isolating at home, including your DH. That's critical you do it properly for everyone else's sake.

yes, am coping with too much iPad time, although the baby is firmly in my arms pretty much 24/7 and howls when I'm getting the kids food etc.

DM is 65 and healthy. DD I am convinced had it in March last year when I was pregnant, but am testing us all on lateral flow every second day.

Thanks coconut, DH doesn't qualify sadly. I have asked to go on furlough, but my work don't do that/havent done it for anyone yet.

Ah sorry. Was worth a look.
It’s so hard. Some people not been able to work for more than a year with no support. It’s a mess .

If you and your DD have had a temperature then you need a PCR not a LFT. Phone 119 ask them if they can do the test on her when you attend test centre.

I know you're feeling awful, but DH will have to help. If you both get it, then muddle through the best you can. You can't risk passing it to your DM. All of you have to stay at home and isolate.

Your DM having it last March won't make her safe, I had it in October and just tested negative for antibodies from infection, I have had two jabs though, when we all had it last October we ended up isolating for a month as people got it at different times, I caught it from the second person to test positive, I hope you're not too unwell

It's a struggle op but you need to manage by yourselves. You can't risk your mum or her passing it further to anyone else who might not be vaccinated. Too much screen time is fine if it's all you can do at the moment, I was hearing Peppa Pig in my sleep when we all had it as DD watched it almost constantly for the 2 weeks we were stuck in the house. Your DH needs to help as much as he can. It's a struggle but it won't be for long. I hope you all feel better soon.

thanks all, it really is horrid. The last thing I'd ever want is dm getting sick or passing to someone else, I just thought it might be safe - especially for DS, sadly seems not.

Yes Coconut it's so tough we both only recently Nov/Jan got jobs as we lost them 1st Covid round. that's why we are chasing our tail with finances and I wanted DH to continue working if possible.

We do have pcr on the way, our local drive through test location you have to test yourself anyway.

Its not who does the test that makes PCR more accurate though, it'll still be more accurate doing a PCR yourself than a lateral flow yourself. Well done for booking the proper tests.
Hope you all feel much better soon.

Are you sure your husband doesn't qualify for financial support?
I am a covid contact advisor so part of my job is to make sure people have the necessary support to isolate.
I've spoken to a few people who thought they couldn't apply for financial support as they weren't on any benefits, however there is also a discretionary payment that they could apply for but you have to apply for the self isolation support scheme first.
I hope you're all well soon

If you become too unwell to care for the children your DH will have to step in. I had Covid and was really quite unwell, but had to keep going looking after 3 kids as DH also had Covid and was hospitalised. Please don't expose your Mum unless both adults become so unwell that it would not be safe for the children.

Don't feel bad about screen time. Get DH to sort breakfast before he starts work, make packed lunches the night before and use one pot oven meals or simple dishes like pasta and sauce for dinner.

Thanks Heart, will look into it again.

So sorry for everyone that has gone through this.

packed lunches are genius. Will sort that now.

I thought having a lockdown baby and trying to find new jobs was going to be the hardest thing I did during this pandemic, this is definitely challenging that experience.

I would really keep your DM out of it all.

We had it in March.
All but the youngest who I suspect was negative on LFT and asymptomatic but probably had it.

It was utterly shite.
I had one vaccine and was feeling terrible.
DH no jabs but fit and well before ended up hospitalised.
We managed
iPad and modern family on demand.
Takeaways left on the doorstep.
Parents dropping emergency supplies on the doorstep.

Your DH will have to step up if needed. It can't be helped.