I was forced to wear a mask during birth last may
I had a massive panic attack because my husband nearly didn’t make it in time and I had been on my own there since the morning because he wasn’t allowed in until close to birth
I wear glasses and couldn’t see a thing through the steam from crying and hyperventilating
My mask was full of snot and tears
I felt like I was drowning
The midwives didn’t let me wear my own mask I had to wear one provided by them. They made me wear one of those nearly rigid ones that was fitted so tightly to my face I ended up with red marks
None of the healthcare team I saw wore those type of masks themselves
This was after subjecting me to my first ever Covid swap that morning where the one up the nose was pushed so far that it hurt and I couldn’t hold back the tears
The midwife doing it said that she knew she went far enough if it made my eyes sting
I’ve since had many more Covid swaps administered on me for other hospital stays and they’ve never been painful like that
It will be a year to the day next week
I am looking forward to celebrating my babies birthday but it’s also bringing up a lot of bad feelings from last year too