What's your most ridiculous covid moment?

[Iremembertheelderlykoreanlady]

Thought we could have a light hearted thread about covid (not intended to offend anyone. I know the whole situation has been awful and tragic and I can't wait for this to be over!)

Apart from a lot of jumping into bushes which i did early on, when walking past people in the fresh air, my most ridiculous moment came tonight.

After my son had his tea he came up to me and said "mum, that pizza tasted funny"

Cue a fairly major panic from me thinking, right, change in taste. I need to get him a test. Oh crap that means he'll miss dancing tomorrow.

Double crap we are supposed to have 2nd vaccine this week. That'll have to be rescheduled.

Triple crap! I've avoided covid this long and now I'm going to catch it 2 days before I'm fully vaccinated! (CV)

....then I remembered he had used corsodyl mouthwash just before (long story!)

Now I feel like a tit Anyone else...?

In ASDA and a member of staff totally losing their shit at me because I’d gone the wrong way round the end of an aisle - however, due to the layout of their one way system, everyone got trapped in the far corner of the shop so had to go the wrong way somewhere

Also in ASDA, standing in a queue on one of their floor stickers, minding my own business, when another shopper stands in the queue behind me and then starts shouting at me that I’m too close and to move away - er...hello? You’re standing too close to me.

Taking mask exempt DD to a hospital appointment. Man in the waiting room became very abusive because maskless DD could kill us all, shouldn’t be allowed out, etc, etc. Staff found us a little separate room where we could wait away from everyone else. Same man then kicks off because we got special treatment

I had a moment a few weeks ago. A colleague had a funny turn at work so I got called down as the first aider. I hesitated as it felt so weird getting that close, even with a mask on. Only a couple of seconds, then I got over myself and got on with it, but it just felt so wrong

This thread is so cathartic. Thank you for starting it.

When things were just starting, I got something for a friend and she posted the cash through my door. I panicked and put it in the freezer until my husband got home so I could ask him what was best to do and he explained freezing would just preserve rather than eliminate the virus.

I also came down in tears one morning at the thought of running out of pasta. I'd managed to source some and my husband dutifully went out and got it for me. All several kilos of it. (It was a caterers selling it off as they couldn't use it) Like the PP mentioned, I don't run cupboards down to anywhere near where I used to and I think that will probably stay, in the way older generations are sometimes still affected by memories of rationing.

One of my elderly neighbours, who never goes out on foot much normally, dutifully went out for her daily exercise every day without fail during lockdown. She's stopped again now.

This was at the start of lockdown in my defence

Tried pegging washing on line but then got paranoid that it would get Covid germs from the air so quickly gathered it up holding my breath and threw it in the tumble dryer praying the heat would kill the germs then decided to leave the washing in tumble dryer for 3 days just in case.

I don't know what my most ridiculous moment is, apart from jumping into bushes when old people were coming the other way.

I do know my favourite moment, that I will remember fondly forever, was having the whole A1 to myself one day. Not another car in sight for miles and miles.

For me the daftest and most amusing Covid moments were all of the batshit threads on here about what constituted essential items when grocery shopping.

I particularly remember the thread where someone seriously suggested putting cheese in coffee because milk wasn't an essential item.

I've never quarantined post or other deliveries and never wiped down sanitised my weekly shopping. Couldn't be arsed and saw no point in it. Cooking destroys bacteria and viruses anyway.

I freaked out every time my children pressed the button for the pelican crossing unless they sanitised their hands before and after using it.

@Aroundtheworldin80moves

Mine is a bit sad.

Walking through shopping centre I October. Woman in a wheelchair calling out to passers by for help. I was the only one who went across to her. She just needed help putting her shopping bag on the handles of her wheel chair so you could move easier.
It just drove home weve lost a bit of humanity.

During the first lockdown my daughter fell off her bike near an elderly couple and I was really touched that they helped her.

I was reading this and thinking I must have been a bit lax compared to most posters. I did once wear a pair of plastic gloves to go round Asda, it was at the point people were queuing for miles round the supermarket carpark wearning all sorts of cobbled together PPE such as old gas masks they had found at home!

I had my head of department run into my class in a flap over a boy having a coughing fit when the schools returned after summer.

I had to explain it was ok, he had actually passed wind, the girl next to him took offence and drowned him in cheap perfume to mask the smell and he was just choking on perfume.

If ever there was a lesson that ended up completely out the window

Watching a customer have a complete meltdown because we wouldn't make people wait 2 meters behind her when she browsed the aisles. She didn't want anyone walking past her, she genuinely thought that they should all stay behind her until she was ready to move.

When Boris announced that the pubs were closing and someone came in 6 o'clock the next morning and tried to buy nearly £800 of spirits 'just in case' and were very put out when we made them put them back because the restrictions were on everything at the time. Apparently 3 bottles of Smirnoff vodka and 3 bottles of grey goose vodka are different things, vodka is vodka and 3 bottles was 3 bottles no matter what size or brand.

Everyone blaming us for not selling non essential items even though they clearly knew it was the Welsh government that made that rule.

Retail has been a blast during a pandemic.

Another moment I just thought of.

My DD works in a small local supermarket. One day during the first lockdown a man came into the shop wearing his own makeshift mask. It was a snorkeling mask with the snorkel pipe cut short at the back. He proceeded to do his shopping like that and looked so ridiculous (like the Man from Atlantis, for those of us old enough to remember him). DD said it was hard to keep a straight face but they had to until he was out of the shop and down the road.

Crying at the poster sterilising newspapers in the oven! At least we can laugh about it all now, eh

@MissMoooo

I made the mistake of watching Contagion during the first lockdown and convinced myself I needed a bag of emergency supplies in case things escalated badly. Completely forgot about it until I went to the pub last week, when I realised I had brought a wind-up torch, water purification tablets and a slingshot out with me!

@MissMoooo I love this post so much. Your survival bag is amazing. I wonder if there was a rush on slingshots in March 2020? How long do you think you'd have lasted with just those essentials?

I couldn't get baby milk. Rang and queued and visited so many shops. Spent hours refreshing websites to try to order online. That was horrid. Most crackpot moment was sitting in a farm cafe outside and DS needed the loo. I went on first to spray seats with dettol ad dettol air!! I told him to make sure he went standing up (he sometimes sits) at which point he said...but I don't know how to do a stand up poo! I think that was my most crackpot day. A friend got moved on for reading on a bench!!

Covered the window panels in my front door panel in newspaper so that I could strip off my "outside clothes" right inside the door so as not to contaminate the rest of the house.

I spent an hour doing this, never actually stripped off though as I managed to get a grip

I haven't read the full thread yet but the cat sneezing on PP face made me laugh and reminded me back in March when Covid first arrived I read about the possibility of cats passing it on so I was really worried and emailed the vet surgery asking if I should keep my cats in. In November I received a reply and I realised some emails I'd tried to send in March hadnt delivered until November! I have no idea how it happened but I was really embarrassed as by November l had calmed down a lot same as most people, they must have thought I was nutter. I thanked them for replying and explained what had happened and they found it funny.

I had to stop my mum spraying my 3 year old with anti bac last Summer when garden visits were first allowed She had touched my daughter's hand and was worried she might have gave her it (she was so anxious working in a hospital). We laugh about it now.

The brief, but serious consideration I gave back in March last year to asking the ex to move in with us. I think I was scared we were on the brink of apocalypse/serious social unrest and thought having a man in the house would be a sensible option. Thank god I did nothing other than think about it!

I was far too worried about keeping my events business afloat in first lockdown to have too many moments of my own. The business survived - just - but to date I've received precisely £0 in central government support (no SEISS, no furlough, no UC) which severely dampened my enthusiasm for all things lockdown. I have always been more scared of the economic effects of lockdown than of the risk of me catching COVID.

Mind you, I did sit down on a park bench in first lockdown as a bit of minor personal rebellion

One of the more jaw dropping moments was spotting two people in full hazmat suits queueing to get into Lidl I nearly crashed the car in shock

And - still carrying on now - the relative who has had her (completely healthy) offspring take a year off university for fear of the DC catching COVID. Just last month she refused to allow student DC a final visit to a fully vaccinated relative, prior to going into a care home. In case the completely healthy 20-something catches COVID from a fully vaccinated 94 year old

There’s not been much funny tbh in this house, it’s all been a tad depressing. I suppose the funniest was in the first lockdown when no one was going anywhere, out in cars or anything. One night my husband heard a car in the street and bolted out of bed and threw open the curtains, so unusual was it for there to be a car in the street.

Oh and the dettol spray. I sprayed dettol spray everywhere. Including on the service station toilet seat before sitting on it when we went away for a few days last year. Lovely damp arse for carrying on my journey

Being so starved of human conversation I spent 15 minutes talking to a dog tied up outside the supermarket

Trying to sew masks. If I had lopsided ears they’d have been awesome. Sadly I don’t. I’ve now got rid of the sewing machine.

Thanks for this OP it’s made me smile x

A year ago it was thought that covid could live on surfaces for hours and hours

Agreed, but even then we knew it didn’t just attack people off surfaces: that was why not touching your face and wasbjfb your hands was so important as that was what spread it

*washing

My teenager, who had hardly left our property for months, counting down the hours until our Tesco trip because she was so desperate for an outing. Of course I wasn't taking "tourist" spare family members into the shop, so this meant she had a 1.2 mile ride in the car and then sat in the car for an hour waiting for me. She said she really enjoyed it, looking out the window at all the people and even waving to some of them.

I suppose the most ridiculous thing for ME is how, as a hypochondriac, UNseriously I've taken the covid threat and how I've railed against the lockdown believing them not to be best course of action.
I mean here I am, worried about every little ache and considering the reaction to a pandemic as OTT, but seeing anything other than the basics of handwashing and not having huge events and advising clinically vulnerable and elderly to be very, very careful as OTT.

But you have to be seen to going along with the covid hysteria so on one occasion when we were allowed to meet in gardens I made a point of saying loudly within earshot of my relatives' neighbours how we had to measure two metres between deckchairs. I actually said in a loud voice, 'get the tape out'.
Eventually the neighbour said just go inside with doors and windows open which we did.
Sane guy. Being in living room with patio doors fully open was like being outside. Can't believe how pedantic some people have been about this.