To break the rule of six for my birthday?

[44jams]

It’s my birthday on Sunday and I’m planning to have a small gathering in the garden with friends. I know I’m meant to stick to the rule of six, but it just seems so nonsensical, considering that we will all be outdoors so our risk of catching the virus is tiny. Would you break the rules and have say five or six households (or 20ish people) round? Or stick to the rule of six even though as I say, the chance of catching it outside is tiny?

@NewModelArmyMayhem18

How grim for the person upthread who was reported when they only had six people present. It's unbelievable how petty-minded some people are.

@Easterlssland has a valid point. The Queen led by example so why can't you just delay gratification by a couple of months? A missed birthday celebration isn't really a massive deal in the scheme of things.

Yep, really killed the mood and now forever wondering which twat of a neighbour it was who wasted police time for it.

@44jams

Speshul people

“Speshul”?

I can’t believe this thread has got so many replies already. In reality I think I would be too worried to do this - not because I’m worried about catching Covid, as we’d all be outdoors anyway, but because I don’t want my neighbours to think I’m selfish.

However, I do find it illogical that 50-100 people are allowed to sit in a pub garden but not 20 in a private garden. It just doesn’t make much sense?

Because the 20 in a beer garden shouldn’t be chatting to each other, are told to stay at their table, don’t help themselves to food and drink from the kitchen 😂😂😂, and often there are systems in place for the loos to prevent queuing in tight corridors.

Also the staff in the beer gardens need their jobs. Nobody needs a birthday party.

I wouldn’t attend a gathering of 20 in a garden. Not because I think it would spread Covid, but I would be worried the neighbours would think we were dickheads.

What’s your your house set up? Large garden? More than 1 loo? Not overlooked by neighbours?

OP, it's not really illogical is it? Being in a pub garden isn't the same scenario as being in your own garden, because you will be with friends/family, presumably people you love and therefore will likely, unintentionally perhaps, become closer as the day and night goes on and the alcohol flows.

I thought you were going to say 8/9 in which case I would have encouraged you.

20 is ott. Can you stagger them or have them on different days? You will be heavily fined if reported to the police.

I had to cancel my wedding as I couldn't even have my 5 children who all live with me there as it would take us to 7 including the minister so yes yabu your not the only person who wants to see friends and family but the longer people break the rules the longer we will be in this situation

I think there is clearly a Brit Stasi in the making. It's a slippery slope (and people wonder how the Nazis came to power).

Really sorry you had to experience that @HarrietOh when you were doing nothing wrong.

As everyone else has said, if you were asking if it'd be alright to have, say, 8 people instead of 6 I wouldn't care. But it actually takes the piss to extend this to 20+ people.

As a guest I'd be anxious about this and would likely turn down the invitation (assuming you'd let me know this in advance). If I didn't know the number of people attending ahead of time I'd be really pissed off to turn up and see another 20 odd people crammed into a garden and lining up inside for the loo. You do need to consider this, and also be cognisant of the fact that other people's risk appetites will differ from yours (despite outside being less risk etc. etc.). I didn't even realise guests could be fined as well (£800!?!) so now knowing this I'd be incredibly pissed off with you if I turned up and didn't know how many were attending as you'd be putting me at risk of a fine too.

In my area neighbours haven't been reporting or being covid-spies etc. However, a group of 20+ in a garden would be impossible to go unnoticed due to the noise and general coming and going of guests. I think some of my neighbours would be annoyed at us for this, even if they didn't pick up the phone and actually report it.

I'd have them inside.

Does anyone else sometimes wonder if threads like this are started by someone working for the government so that they can guage public opinion on lockdown compliance?

Maybe I'm just cynical. Or paranoid. Or both!

I've just had yet another birthday in lockdown, so I'm celebrating my big birthday (from last year, ends in '0' ) NEXT year.

It'll be cool as folk will think I'm 1 or 2 years younger than I actually am !

Invites will go out to say that I'm celebrating a postponed Big Birthday but won't actually say when it is postponed from. We're having it in my friend's very large garden as it is actually her birthday too, so a joint celebration and she is actually 2 years younger so everyone will assume also my big birthday year - but it'll a couple of months later in June, and we've lots and lots of mutual friends.

Personally I'd say not worth the risk, a) someone will hear and report and you'll get big fine and b) some of your friends may opt not to go if they know the numbers c) you really do not want to catch covid it can be nasty. Far, far better to do a big celebrate after the pandemic is under control next year

I personally wouldn't have that many. I'd maybe push it to 7 or 8 people but not 20. Mainly because would all attendees be on board? I'd be pissed if someone invited me and didn't mention there'd be 20 people.

Also I just think it's unnecessary - 6 people is enough

Do it!

My neighbour had people in her garden last weekend for her birthday. She told about 3 times there would be 6 people but DH said he saw about 12 people go in.

I couldn't care less.

People in beer gardens are closer to random strangers

I am so angry to read this morning that 3000 people are due to land from India before the red list strictures take effect, and that recently every plane from Delhi to places like Toronto has carried people infectious with the Indian Variant.

I do not understand why some people can sit on planes amongst hundreds others and travel the world while we can’t sit in our gardens with 7

Yes, some of the rules just make no sense!

Another option would be to have three or four groups of 6 over the course of the weekend. But again I don’t see how it makes sense from a Covid point of view - if someone in group 1 has Covid and gives it to me, I could then transmit it to someone in group 2 and so on. But technically I will be within the rules.

You know you shouldn’t do this but you choose to ignore the rules. No wonder we have trouble getting out of this. Is this just a normal birthday? Or is a special one?

The 50-100 people in the pub garden don't know each other so the groups can remain socially distanced and are unlikely to intermingle. The same can't be said of those in the private garden.

What about the staff going round from table to table? And the fact they’ll all be using the same few toilets (I only mention that as someone upthread gave that as a reason for not allowing gatherings in gardens).

No, not 20.

Split them up and then they can come in groups of 6 - it will spin the fun out longer.

Just do it. It doesn’t sound like you are listening to any answers anyway.

I think up to 10 is more appropriate. 20 is very obviously flouting the rules, so I wouldn't go that far.

Not because of Covid spreading (I can't get too concerned about outdoor transmission) but more about the optics and likelihood of being reported.

Is be pissed to be invited and find 20 people there as I’d be fined too and I can’t afford it.

@44jams

The 50-100 people in the pub garden don't know each other so the groups can remain socially distanced and are unlikely to intermingle. The same can't be said of those in the private garden.

What about the staff going round from table to table? And the fact they’ll all be using the same few toilets (I only mention that as someone upthread gave that as a reason for not allowing gatherings in gardens).

The, 'What about staff?' argument is like when people in the height of lockdown were saying, 'What about supermarket workers? They're inside with loads of people, so why can't I be inside with loads of people?'

It's a risk to have the workers do it. If everyone else does it too, it's a much bigger risk. And if the government hear a lot of, 'Well, I can't understand how my garden is any different to a licensed restaurant or public house,' we'll all end up back in lockdown. Give an inch and they take a mile and all that. Patience is a virtue.

As for toilets, are you planning to have a number of different toilets for your party, with regular cleaning by staff who have been trained in doing a proper job and a full risk assessment? Or is everyone going to be using the same room?

I'm meant to be going to a gathering this weekend where I know they are slightly over the numbers. Am beginning to doubt I should go after reading some of these replies.

Really?

I can’t believe you have to ask a question like this.

Be the Queen and spread the celebrations out, stick to small groups and stick to the rules. Please. Haven’t we all sacrificed enough without compromising everyone at this stage?

It's a big 0 birthday for me in a few weeks and I won't be breaking any rules. I couldn't live with myself if someone who came to my party caught covid.

There'll be other days when you can invite as many as you like. Better wait til it's safer than you or a member of your family or close friends end up with covid.

*osbertthesyrianhamster

I'd have them inside.*

There's 66 million people in the UK, so about 182,000 people have a birthday every day. If everyone thought their birthday was so special that they should be allowed 20 people at their party, that would be over 3.6 million people a day going to big birthday parties. I imagine COVID would love that...