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Original poster

To break the rule of six for my birthday?

286 replies

44jams · 20/04/2021 06:42

It’s my birthday on Sunday and I’m planning to have a small gathering in the garden with friends. I know I’m meant to stick to the rule of six, but it just seems so nonsensical, considering that we will all be outdoors so our risk of catching the virus is tiny. Would you break the rules and have say five or six households (or 20ish people) round? Or stick to the rule of six even though as I say, the chance of catching it outside is tiny?

OP posts:
NewModelArmyMayhem18 · 20/04/2021 08:33

How grim for the person upthread who was reported when they only had six people present. It's unbelievable how petty-minded some people are.

@Easterlssland has a valid point. The Queen led by example so why can't you just delay gratification by a couple of months? A missed birthday celebration isn't really a massive deal in the scheme of things.

Stillgoings · 20/04/2021 08:36

20!! What would your friends say? Wouldn't they be mortified to be part of it

AllThatFancyPaintsAsFair · 20/04/2021 08:36

You are obvioulsy a special birthday princess who can't wait for a few weeks to celebrate so perfectly fine to ignore any rules you choose. I'm surprised you even need to ask given your elevated status

BarbaraofSeville · 20/04/2021 08:37

@RolloTomassi

I think the rule is illogical so I don't judge you, and I'm sure it would be fine, covid-wise. But 20 seems a lot more than, say, 10. For me it wouldn't be worth the hassle of potentially being reported. Your guests might feel awkward being among that many too. In your shoes I'd reduce it down.
But the rules aren't illogical on a population level. It's all based on Monte Carlo modelling, which is the established scientific methodology for risk based outcomes.

The less people interact, the fewer transmissions happen. And the risk of transmission isn't zero outside, it's just lower.

The point about cigarette smoke is a good one. If you were stood chatting to a smoker, the smell of smoke is a lot worse than if someone is at the other side of the garden smoking.

The more people you know at a gathering, the more people you will talk to, the more people you will hug, therefore it's not the same risk when you have 20 people in the same garden that all know each other, compared with 20 people in a beer garden where you only know 5 of them.

MikeWozniaksGloriousTache · 20/04/2021 08:39

It's unbelievable how petty-minded some people are.
I was at a bbq (6 of us) on Sunday. Friend lives in a pretty little village and a small part of boundary hedge is low enough to see in. We actually caught one women physically counting us, it was pathetic but hilarious as we just waved.

20 is utterly taking the piss though. I don’t get why adults are this precious about birthdays. You could always split the day, Saturday 6, Sunday 6 you get a speshul little weekend just for you OP Grin

LolaNova · 20/04/2021 08:39

7 or 8 is probably reasonable if you were inviting family and it would be rude to leave one person out but 20 is a proper party and it’s taking the piss. No way you’d be properly socially distanced which is probably ok if there’s only a few of you but with 20 people not socially distancing it’s a much more significant risk.

NewModelArmyMayhem18 · 20/04/2021 08:40

I do agree though that the current rules are not logical at all, although it seems that in the interests of saving the economy things are allowed 'out and about' that aren't at home. However, I think that mixed messaging is what's causing many to start making up their own rules!

Personally, I would much rather take my chances getting a very occasional lift from a friend in a well-ventilated car (wearing a mask and sitting diagonally opposite them) than be on a crowded bus with random strangers, some of whom are not wearing masks.

Crustybreadandbutter · 20/04/2021 08:41

You could say that about many of the rules. You will have to decide if all your friends are happy to break the rules and all your neighbours are happy to turn a blind eye. The more you have the more people will need the toilet, the more need to host ie more contact with each other.

I agree tho total risk vanishingly small. It’s not about the risk in this one scenario. It’s about the effect in total on a population.

Postmysecret · 20/04/2021 08:43

I get it. We’re all sick of the rules especially when those most likely to die or become seriously I’ll from COVID have been vaccinated, however yabu and taking the mick at 20, 8/9 maybe even 10 maybe but 20!

Frownette · 20/04/2021 08:45

20 is a huge leap on 6.

Have a small celebration on your birthday then a larger gathering when it's permitted.

HazeyJaneII · 20/04/2021 08:46

20?!
No, if you want that many wait until it's ok.

pommedeterre · 20/04/2021 08:50

Do it in shifts, slots for each family? I wouldn't do it (didn't do it back in the Autumn for my big birthday).

rosie39forever · 20/04/2021 08:52

Go for it !! After all the rules don't apply to you and your family and friends cos you're so special.

minniemomo · 20/04/2021 08:53

If you had said 7 or 8 including a newborn then I would have said yanbu but 20 is wrong - it's the breaking of the rules that allows spread and you are meant to be socially distanced, highly unlikely if alcohol is involved

HowWeAre · 20/04/2021 08:56

I thought you were going to say 7 or maybe 8! 20 is taking the piss and I wouldn’t be surprised if you were reported for that many people.

M1551nglink · 20/04/2021 08:57

@BarbaraofSeville great post. (Love your username)

Most of us are not able to judge what's risky or not at a population level.

If enough people break the rules in what seems a small way for them as individuals then in a population of millions the risk of transmission of (possibly dangerous mutations) increases greatly.

Surely that's not too difficult to understand?

Original poster
44jams · 20/04/2021 09:01

Speshul people

“Speshul”? Hmm

I can’t believe this thread has got so many replies already. In reality I think I would be too worried to do this - not because I’m worried about catching Covid, as we’d all be outdoors anyway, but because I don’t want my neighbours to think I’m selfish.

However, I do find it illogical that 50-100 people are allowed to sit in a pub garden but not 20 in a private garden. It just doesn’t make much sense?

OP posts:
iMatter · 20/04/2021 09:01

If you insist on going ahead then you need to let all your guests know there will be 20 people there. I would go to a party with 6 outside but not 20 and I would be annoyed if I turned up and there were more than 6.

And if there's drink no doubt there will be lots of hugging and close contact.

EasterIssland · 20/04/2021 09:02

@44jams

Speshul people

“Speshul”? Hmm

I can’t believe this thread has got so many replies already. In reality I think I would be too worried to do this - not because I’m worried about catching Covid, as we’d all be outdoors anyway, but because I don’t want my neighbours to think I’m selfish.

However, I do find it illogical that 50-100 people are allowed to sit in a pub garden but not 20 in a private garden. It just doesn’t make much sense?

speak with your MP or maybe Boris and let him know so they change the guidance
murbblurb · 20/04/2021 09:05

Crowded pub gardens clearly are a risk, but there is someone allegedly responsible. Start swilling with your friends in the garden and you'll all be inside soon, spreading covid.

And yes, what makes you above the law just because it is n exact number of years since your mother performed a biological function?

MrBond · 20/04/2021 09:05

However, I do find it illogical that 50-100 people are allowed to sit in a pub garden but not 20 in a private garden. It just doesn’t make much sense?

The 50-100 people in the pub garden don't know each other so the groups can remain socially distanced and are unlikely to intermingle. The same can't be said of those in the private garden.

RedcurrantPuff · 20/04/2021 09:05

@Waxonwaxoff0

I'd be too concerned about being reported. There are a lot of busybodies around.
This
ceeveebeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep · 20/04/2021 09:06

Pubs have done risk assessments to make sure that household groups are spread out in groups of 6, that everyone is checks in for test and trace purposes, that there is frequent cleaning of bathrooms, surfaces, and no sharing or cutlery or crockery etc. So that’s why they can have more.

Personally I’d have just my own friends not their DHs or DCs, both to stick to the rules but also because parties with loads of DC running around not fun for the adults in my opinion!

RainingBatsAndFrogs · 20/04/2021 09:09

I am so angry to read this morning that 3000 people are due to land from India before the red list strictures take effect, and that recently every plane from Delhi to places like Toronto has carried people infectious with the Indian Variant.

I do not understand why some people can sit on planes amongst hundreds others and travel the world while we can’t sit in our gardens with 7 , and the Gvt pays us to furlough or we work online rather than travel down the road to our office. Or why our students have missed practical teaching for a year, and this international travel has persisted.

Ask your MP to explain this.

RedcurrantPuff · 20/04/2021 09:11

@RainingBatsAndFrogs

I am so angry to read this morning that 3000 people are due to land from India before the red list strictures take effect, and that recently every plane from Delhi to places like Toronto has carried people infectious with the Indian Variant.

I do not understand why some people can sit on planes amongst hundreds others and travel the world while we can’t sit in our gardens with 7 , and the Gvt pays us to furlough or we work online rather than travel down the road to our office. Or why our students have missed practical teaching for a year, and this international travel has persisted.

Ask your MP to explain this.

Very good points