This is so fucking shit for young people

[ssd]

Yeah i know its shit for everyone before you pounce on me

But imagine being around 20 just now...no pubs, no nightclubs, no jobs around, no buzz in your town centre, no excuse to dress up in something new, or planning your latest night out, meeting your pals and all the excitement of the night ahead.

Its just so fucking shite.

I got the train home tonight from work, Glasgow city centre is a ghost town. Places that were always busy boarded up, of course everything except like of newsagents and tesco's shut. Its Friday night. It was always jumping when i was young, absolutely jumping. It was dead. On the train was a bunch if young boys, playing music a bit too loud, all singing along....going home from the city centre at 6pm!!!!. I could have cried watching them all, a nice sunny evening and the only place they are heading was back to mum and dads, or a local park maybe, i dont know. They were about 18, casual dressed, haircuts, all wanting a good time with their pals and probably hoping to meet a partner if they were single.

Where is the life for these kids???

This has gone on long enough. I dont care if i never see inside a pub again. I've had a brilliant social life at that age. Now they have fuck all.

Its too much.

It has indeed been shite but it's not forever - we're nearly through it

Vaccinations and the lockdown really do seem to have broken the back of it and that looks set to just keep getting better despite re-opening a few things rather than any increase in numbers and further lockdowns.

Fork out!

@colouringindoors

People think young people have been failed, but I really feel you are failing them now. Feels very self indulging about how much pity you are feeling, about how their future has been destroyed and there is nothing left for them. If you're passing these thoughts onto them, if this is what you think, if all you want to do is get a kick out of how bad you feel without doing anything, then what's the point

Indulgent for parents on a parenting website to express pity? Is that really what you're saying? wow.
Myself, like all parents I know have kept a cheery face and positive outlook with our kids. And you're telling us off for coming on here sharing our concerns and sadness. You sound nice 🙄

Some posters believe there is nothing but doom and gloom ahead for this generation. That's not the kind of mind set they need.

@NursePye

It seems to me that the anger on behalf of the young is being amplified by the generation above them, which in the case of parents is understandable.

However what I find very sad is people turning that anger on to the older generation and those who are ECV.

I have teenage DCs and it hasn't been the greatest year for them admittedly.

However, speaking as someone who developed a chronic illness and disability in their early teens and

• missed large chunks of school
• missed friendships and socialising
• was a teenager in a time before mobile phones or the internet
• had to leave university after a year due to not coping with disability there

I still survived and became a fully functioning adult, even though I was medically retired in my early 40s after trying and failing to work and live with my limitations.

I am classed as ECV and have been shielding for a year. Do you think that "I've had my life" to quote pps?
Do you think my DC would rather have lost me than have had to stop going out and having fun?
FWIW they did lose their Grandfather to Covid- but he was in his late 80s so again, according to the pps on here it was no big deal that he died alone having been unable to see any of his children or grandchildren for the best part of a year.

I hope that I am teaching my DC that no one life is more valuable than another and that this pandemic is nobody's fault. I am and never have been a Tory supporter but I still think it will be a long time before we can really assess which countries handled this thing best.

In the meantime whatever happened to showing others some compassion and understanding regardless of their age.

Well said. I agree and I believe the majority of our younger generation are more understanding of the importance of social responsibilities.

The ageism allegation always seems to aimed at those being pro young or critical of old - rarely the opposite way

This. It’s consistently been the case on MN throughout the pandemic - some people just seem unable to grasp the fact that ageism can work both ways.

Those posters upthread who are angry at young people for congregating on public space, drinking in parks and not wearing masks properly... Well I feel the same about the elderly lady who shouted and waved her walking stick at me a few weeks ago while telling me all small children were super spreaders and should be kept indoors. And the numerous others who have chided and tutted at me for taking DD into shops and other public spaces over the past year. And the posters on social media who frequently other young people and flippantly say things like ‘Primary kids should all be masked’ while insisting all children are adaptable/resilient/insert appropriate Covid buzzword here.

I think sometimes cries of ‘ageism’ are used to prevent anyone from questioning the status quo or tackling the significant demographic issues that are coming down the line.

YANBU
I think younger children as well. My dd would be what I’d class as the golden age to be in this thing. First year of secondary when the pandemic hit so had all the yr6 parties. Now yr8 and has been meeting friends in the park etc or a friend for walks in the earlier days but not old enough to have exams affected. Obviously homeschooling was awful. But she had me around to help. Not that she wanted that much help.

@Tealightsandd

It's massively shit, but it's even more shit for elderly. At least the young will have a chance to make up for lost time.

To be fair our grandfather spent his teens and early 20s in a Labour camp or fighting for the army so he missed out on that part too. Yes he's had his late 20s, 30s etc but so can the young people today. I didn't really have the pub and clubbing experience as I was caring for a parent. I went off the rails in my mid 20s as a result and that was fun.

It's hard, I've seen my eldest become socially anxious and worried about being around large groups of people. She's taking her gcses and has no idea what's going to happen. Its an awful situation.

What's the point of these threads? They just wind people up. I've an 18 year old ds. He's pretty sanguine about it. He understands why lockdown was necessary, he's frustrated but accepts it. I work on the front line so maybe I've influenced him. As somebody said upthread, it's a fraction of their lives, things will get back to normality.

my parents - my kids grandparents - have the attitude that they've had their life, their fun, and feel very sad for the impact Covid has had on their grandkids, their education, social and emotiomal wellbeing

I know many 75+/80+ grandparents. None of them think 'I've had my life'. They are all desperate to keep on living - like the rest of us

I don't really understand the "fraction of lives", when they are losing out on university experiences that they are paying a huge sum of money for. They won't be going back to university. I am not blaming the old for this. But I think I am allowed to feel a little sad.

The pandemic has disrupted life as we know it, the very fabric of the way things should be and done and by when.

Pre pandemic life was all about going to the office for work, not anymore its not. Its going chnahed and its not ever going bsck. It'll be a mixture of some business saying go back in, most doing hybrid working and some switching completely to wfh.

Same with education, technology that wasn't being fully used before means do lessons need to be face to face all the time. At the GP you had to go in and get your prescription even just for hay-fever tablets, now I ring up and they just let boots know and I go collect it. So much better, no more having to make pointless appointments just to get a repeat prescription.

So many aspects of life is changing and we're all going to have to get used to it not all going bsck to how it used to be.

@treeeeemendous yes I did name a few positives from last year but I guess you didn’t read all of my post!

Directly from teenagers that I know, positives:

• being able to relax more without all the pressure. Pressure from exams were off (didn’t have to take them). Pressure from going to all the parties and instead just hang out one to one with a smaller group of friends. They’ve grown much closer to their friends.
• teenage girl - anxiety greatly reduced in the last year. She was able to take a step back from worrying constantly about whether she ‘looked good’, and out of school her self directed work suited her much more. Not everyone has a good experience of school. She missed her friends, but with social media they kept in touch loads and met up outside for walks. Some of the annoying friends who weren’t a great influence, got ditched which was a good thing for this particular girls self esteem. It was easier to have good friendships in the last year, the ones that last not being in a club, or pub.

@colouringindoors

Like many other posters, my parents - my kids grandparents - have the attitude that they've had their life, their fun, and feel very sad for the impact Covid has had on their grandkids, their education, social and emotiomal wellbeing.

This is such an odd, much repeated trope on MN. Did your parents just tell you this out of the blue one day? "It doesn't matter if we die, sweetheart, we just want the kids to have their opportunities." Or did you ask them how they felt?

@Frequentflier my oldest is at Uni and had to do it all online. If this was going to be the experience for the whole 3 years then I agree that would be awful. But one year? It’s completely fine to be honest in the grand scheme of things. She met up with her course people a few times out of lockdown, so now they know each other they can’t wait to hang out at Uni when it’s open. She didn’t sit in Halls on her own, she lived with me instead. I think sending people to halls of residence was awful to be honest!

Also some Universities did handle it pretty well. Cambridge University for example did weekly ‘pooled’ tests of resident pods and was very strict on no parties. It worked well and most people were able to have a semi normal Uni life.

@cyclingmad

The pandemic has disrupted life as we know it, the very fabric of the way things should be and done and by when.

Pre pandemic life was all about going to the office for work, not anymore its not. Its going chnahed and its not ever going bsck. It'll be a mixture of some business saying go back in, most doing hybrid working and some switching completely to wfh.

Same with education, technology that wasn't being fully used before means do lessons need to be face to face all the time. At the GP you had to go in and get your prescription even just for hay-fever tablets, now I ring up and they just let boots know and I go collect it. So much better, no more having to make pointless appointments just to get a repeat prescription.

So many aspects of life is changing and we're all going to have to get used to it not all going bsck to how it used to be.

The more it's gone on, yes I agree that some things will change permanently. I did laugh when my Son told me how his head of year joked that they should take a moment to reflect the passing of 'snow days'. Never again will it mean a day off school now that Teams are rooted in! I'd say his teachers were as upset as the kids on that one.

Protecting the NHS was in order to allow it to deal with the elderly. Patients of 90 plus with Covid could be treated - wheat as routine screening has been delayed, cancer treatment delayed etc etc the country protected those groups - fair enough for a short time but we need to recognise how this has impacted disproportionately in other groups. Yes some young people might have benefited as noted here but for the vast majority the opposite is true

@Juliettbravo I agree I am pretty surprised by these threads to be honest and decided to comment - partly to say - there are loads of people that are not experiencing the same dramatic devastation! All my family are fine. All the adults are fine, all the kids are fine. We are thankful no one died, no one lost their job. The worst was our parents who were extremely high risk and had to shield on their own for months - but one lovely thing was how much all their grandkids looked out for them. They zoom called, stood outside their doorstep with treats. All our young wore masks no problem, distanced, got on with online schooling. No one is traumatized and no one has terrible long term prospects.

Young people have definitely been the most complained about group (if our local area Facebook is anything to go by). My experience is that compliance is not lower among 16-25 year olds than any other age group, but because they tend to congregate in groups outside rather than visiting each other in their houses (as older non-compliant adults have done) they are simply more visible.

Not to mention that parents with young children are now complaining about teens hanging around parks (sitting in groups, chatting - no undesirable behaviour). Where exactly are they meant to go?

@NursePye

It seems to me that the anger on behalf of the young is being amplified by the generation above them, which in the case of parents is understandable.

However what I find very sad is people turning that anger on to the older generation and those who are ECV.

I have teenage DCs and it hasn't been the greatest year for them admittedly.

However, speaking as someone who developed a chronic illness and disability in their early teens and

• missed large chunks of school
• missed friendships and socialising
• was a teenager in a time before mobile phones or the internet
• had to leave university after a year due to not coping with disability there

I still survived and became a fully functioning adult, even though I was medically retired in my early 40s after trying and failing to work and live with my limitations.

I am classed as ECV and have been shielding for a year. Do you think that "I've had my life" to quote pps?
Do you think my DC would rather have lost me than have had to stop going out and having fun?
FWIW they did lose their Grandfather to Covid- but he was in his late 80s so again, according to the pps on here it was no big deal that he died alone having been unable to see any of his children or grandchildren for the best part of a year.

I hope that I am teaching my DC that no one life is more valuable than another and that this pandemic is nobody's fault. I am and never have been a Tory supporter but I still think it will be a long time before we can really assess which countries handled this thing best.

In the meantime whatever happened to showing others some compassion and understanding regardless of their age.

Speaking as a disabled person myself who was house-bound for the vast majority of my youth. Living like that was miserable and tragic. No social life, no fun parties, no university. I have no memories of happy adventures (aside from, perhaps, the many drs and hospital appointments! lol) of living a youthful life.

Sure, like you, I "survived". But my god, there's more to life than mere survival, and I don't for a second healthy young people to just f* their youth off for because people with lives and personal histories like mine exist.

It smacks of almost a kind of vengence: "If I couldn't have that kind of life, then I don't care that others now can't either."

@twelly

Protecting the NHS was in order to allow it to deal with the elderly. Patients of 90 plus with Covid could be treated - wheat as routine screening has been delayed, cancer treatment delayed etc etc the country protected those groups - fair enough for a short time but we need to recognise how this has impacted disproportionately in other groups. Yes some young people might have benefited as noted here but for the vast majority the opposite is true

So not true. The health service was protected for all groups. Maternity, accident and emergency, icu for anyone needing care from lifesaving operations. Paediatric wards to continue treating our children. Yes routine services were disrupted but so much more lifesaving treatments were able to carry on.

Posters blithely saying it's nearly over. Yes, for people old enough to have a pension whose standard of life will return to normal. Not so for huge numbers of younger people.

I hope the people who benefit from that appreciate it.

What on earth is it to do with whether people have a pension or not?

What on earth is it to do with whether people have a pension or not

Because generally those with an existing pension aren’t having to compete for a dramatically depleted number of often very poorly paid, insecure jobs in the biggest downturn the world has ever known, against the backdrop of a rapidly changing workplace where working practices have altered often beyond recognition. And often with tens of thousands of pounds of tuition fee debt to pay back before they even begin.

The nhs mostly during the pandemic dealt with the elderly, yes emergencies and maternity were catered for - however the rest was delayed or much reduce hence the huge backlogs. The elderly and vulnerable were behind this approach - which I understand in the short term. The continued approach to protecting the group is admirable but asking them to lockdown whilst life continued for everyone else would have been the best course of action. There has been a whole new group of vulnerable created through the government action

@TempsPerdu

What on earth is it to do with whether people have a pension or not

Because generally those with an existing pension aren’t having to compete for a dramatically depleted number of often very poorly paid, insecure jobs in the biggest downturn the world has ever known, against the backdrop of a rapidly changing workplace where working practices have altered often beyond recognition. And often with tens of thousands of pounds of tuition fee debt to pay back before they even begin.

Exactly. Why des this need spelling out? People in their eighties didn't have to pay for their children to go to uni - it used to be free. As was dental and eye care. They weren't fleeced with crazy mortgages - they could buy a family home on a single income. They were promised jobs for life and many of them had them: no zero hours contracts, proper pensions, savings that reaped the benefit of the massive explosion of interest in 1980s when it went up to 13%.

By contrast, our children are growing up into a world where they start adult life with colossal debts, even a poky flat is out of reach unless they buy with someone else and there's no job security.