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Original poster

Refusing to go out until zero covid

347 replies

IrmaFayLear · 12/04/2021 10:08

Bil and sil have not been out since March 2020. They wfh, in 50s with no health conditions at all. They have both been fully vaccinated - two doses (sil’s best friend is a GP Hmm ). Dh was speaking to bil yesterday and he said it’s not safe until cases are zero worldwide, and that because they care so much about each other (!) they have decided that they cannot take any risk.

Are there many people like this? I was in the shielding category and although I have been ultra cautious, I have still gone for walks, dashed into the chemist in a hazmat suit etc etc. I wonder if they are extreme outliers or whether there will be more recluses now, feeling fully justified.

OP posts:
DenisetheMenace · 12/04/2021 20:30

Am I the only person shocked that a GP would have vaccinated two healthy people in their 50s right at the beginning of the rollout when older people were dying in their thousands?

I’m all for spares being used up at the end of the day now but I find it hard to believe that there were spares going back in December.

MarshaBradyo · 12/04/2021 20:31

@DenisetheMenace

Am I the only person shocked that a GP would have vaccinated two healthy people in their 50s right at the beginning of the rollout when older people were dying in their thousands?

I’m all for spares being used up at the end of the day now but I find it hard to believe that there were spares going back in December.

I am. More so that all it takes is knowing a GP and budging in.
Wellbythebloodyhell · 12/04/2021 20:33

@SpnBaby1967

I've mentioned on here before about my mums best friend.

She locked herself and her husband away in the house from mid February 2020. They havent left the house since.

Once the Tesco man came to the door and handed her husband the sheet, she freaked out, ran over and slammed the door on the delivery man screaming he was too close.

They were invited for their vaccine but refused it as it meant either leaving the house or having someone in their house. Their nearest vaccine spot is a chemist in their little high street, the idea of parking a car in a car park is horrifying for her.

I actually dont know how she will ever leave her house again Sad

They have a leak coming from their bath, its starting to damage their kitchen but they cant get a plumber in to fix it even if they all worse PPE.

Wow that's some serious isolating going on there! This is a very tragic way of living life now Sad
theleafandnotthetree · 12/04/2021 20:34

@DenisetheMenace

Am I the only person shocked that a GP would have vaccinated two healthy people in their 50s right at the beginning of the rollout when older people were dying in their thousands?

I’m all for spares being used up at the end of the day now but I find it hard to believe that there were spares going back in December.

I am and you are but it doesn't seem to have raised too many eyebrows here. Selfish arses, a GP of dubious ethics and a sense of entitlement all round.
Alsohuman · 12/04/2021 20:39

@DenisetheMenace

Am I the only person shocked that a GP would have vaccinated two healthy people in their 50s right at the beginning of the rollout when older people were dying in their thousands?

I’m all for spares being used up at the end of the day now but I find it hard to believe that there were spares going back in December.

No you’re not. I think it’s fucking outrageous.

I think families are going to have to get tough too. There’s absolutely no excuse for not doing your own shopping now. It’s so sad that such a good job’s been made of frightening people to death.

Hardbackwriter · 12/04/2021 20:43

I think that families are in some cases going to have to get a bit tough and gently refuse to run around after or provide the kind of supports some people have come to expect. Especially where the person is perfectly competent and at minimal risk. For their own sake, it's no way to live. As a general rule, we should aim to live as independently as possible for as long as possible and anything we can do for ourselves we should. And it is ok for people who are doing the supporting to be tired of doing so.

There's been a lot of discussion about this on the WhatsApp group for the covid local aid group that I volunteered for - I stopped volunteering when I was pregnant so haven't seen it first-hand but there's a lot of concern in the group about the small but significant percentage of those that have been having their shopping/prescriptions/etc done by the volunteers who seem to intend to now use this service for the rest of their lives - apparently quite a few have made it clear that they don't expect to resume doing it themselves or make other arrangements, ever. Which obviously isn't quite what the volunteers thought they were signing up for last March...

islockdownoveryet · 12/04/2021 20:46

@SpnBaby1967

I've mentioned on here before about my mums best friend.

She locked herself and her husband away in the house from mid February 2020. They havent left the house since.

Once the Tesco man came to the door and handed her husband the sheet, she freaked out, ran over and slammed the door on the delivery man screaming he was too close.

They were invited for their vaccine but refused it as it meant either leaving the house or having someone in their house. Their nearest vaccine spot is a chemist in their little high street, the idea of parking a car in a car park is horrifying for her.

I actually dont know how she will ever leave her house again Sad

They have a leak coming from their bath, its starting to damage their kitchen but they cant get a plumber in to fix it even if they all worse PPE.

Hmmm I’m not sure if I feel sorry for people like this or I’m quite angry. Ok if people don’t want to leave the house but if it’s a irrational deal there is something wrong . So many of us have made huge sacrifices during the last 12 months it upsets me that some people are so very frightened still . Of course there is still risk but if we aren’t living some kind of life what is the point .
Alsohuman · 12/04/2021 20:46

Easily sorted @Hardbackwriter - all the volunteers step down.

Hardbackwriter · 12/04/2021 20:53

@Alsohuman

Easily sorted *@Hardbackwriter* - all the volunteers step down.
I think a lot of them feel a lot of responsibility for people that they have, after all, been helping and have built up a relationship with for a year - but it's not sustainable, and it's also beginning to feel like it might be hindering not helping these people to facilitate them never leaving the house. As I said it isn't actually a dilemma I face, thankfully, but I can see why those that do feel they can't just abruptly stop.
Fluffycloudland77 · 12/04/2021 20:53

@DenisetheMenace

Am I the only person shocked that a GP would have vaccinated two healthy people in their 50s right at the beginning of the rollout when older people were dying in their thousands?

I’m all for spares being used up at the end of the day now but I find it hard to believe that there were spares going back in December.

I’m not shocked in the same way a lawyer won’t be shocked you’ve stolen money off your employer. Used to it.

Things go on, mostly their very hardworking individuals.

theleafandnotthetree · 12/04/2021 20:59

@Hardbackwriter

I think that families are in some cases going to have to get a bit tough and gently refuse to run around after or provide the kind of supports some people have come to expect. Especially where the person is perfectly competent and at minimal risk. For their own sake, it's no way to live. As a general rule, we should aim to live as independently as possible for as long as possible and anything we can do for ourselves we should. And it is ok for people who are doing the supporting to be tired of doing so.

There's been a lot of discussion about this on the WhatsApp group for the covid local aid group that I volunteered for - I stopped volunteering when I was pregnant so haven't seen it first-hand but there's a lot of concern in the group about the small but significant percentage of those that have been having their shopping/prescriptions/etc done by the volunteers who seem to intend to now use this service for the rest of their lives - apparently quite a few have made it clear that they don't expect to resume doing it themselves or make other arrangements, ever. Which obviously isn't quite what the volunteers thought they were signing up for last March...

I would imagine compassion/volunteering fatigue has well and truly set in. Not sure what the set up is in the UK but here in Ireland I'd suggest getting the Public health nurse or occupational therapist to speak with those people who for whatever reason - everything on a spectrum from genuine fear to complacency to blatant piss-taking - have gotten stuck in this pattern. They need to get unstuck, it is unfair to the volunteers and clearly unsustainable.
duffeldaisy · 12/04/2021 21:04

Surely a better date to start withdrawing support would be in July when all adults will have had both vaccinations, if things go to plan?
Then you can legitimately argue that it's pretty safe for people to go back to normal more fully again. Only 10% have had both vaccines so far, so we're not there yet.

Hardbackwriter · 12/04/2021 21:23

Oh, to be clear, there's no question about it stopping immediately, or even next month - more a lot of concern from the volunteers about the fact that it's becoming apparent that some of the people being helped don't expect it to stop ever, or at least under any reasonably foreseeable circumstances. There's also some of them that probably actually have lost the capacity to run their own errands in the last year, but obviously a covid aid group can't be the permanent solution to that.

hodgebit · 12/04/2021 21:48

If they are planning to leave the house again until there's zero Covid, why did they bother to get the vaccine?

JustDanceAddict · 12/04/2021 21:59

Wtf?! Covid is always going to be around even if it’s controlled. These people are going to be in forever.,

letsmakethishappen · 13/04/2021 07:16

Some people just can’t be bothered to see others and are just using Covid ad an excuse. To avoid drama probably . I don’t blame them.

MargosKaftan · 13/04/2021 07:21

They only have each other to speak to, then they will be feeding off each others fear.

And change is hard. Doing nothing and telling yourself its the right choice is easy.

OP - don't tell them your plans. Just get on with your life. Let them see other people doing that. Either they will realise its safe and start rejoining life, or they won't. But talking to them about it will only make you feel bad.

DandelionSprout · 13/04/2021 07:42

This just shows how successful the government’s campaign of fear has been. People are too scared to go out even when numbers are low.

Houseofvelour · 13/04/2021 07:47

We have a friend who hasn't left the house, not even for walks.
He is CEV and from this week will be fully vaccinated.

We've asked him if he'd like to come for a socially distanced walk when he's fully vaccinated but he's not keen on the idea.
I do worry about his long term mental health.

DandelionSprout · 13/04/2021 07:50

My biggest fear is for my little boy. He’s obviously not vaccinated and not likely to be. It seems irresponsible to vaccinate myself then go about our lives with no protection for him.

Alsohuman · 13/04/2021 08:01

@DandelionSprout

My biggest fear is for my little boy. He’s obviously not vaccinated and not likely to be. It seems irresponsible to vaccinate myself then go about our lives with no protection for him.
Why? If children get it they’re almost always asymptomatic or only slightly ill. Do you worry about him catching a cold?
Iwonder08 · 13/04/2021 08:04

Good, let them stay indoors. Fewer judgemental people outside

DandelionSprout · 13/04/2021 08:09

Do you worry about him catching a cold?
This isn’t a cold. It’s a virus which has caused a huge number of deaths and made our economy literally grind to a halt. It’s so serious that we’ve been locked in our houses for a year. So unsurprisingly I don’t want him to catch it if it’s that serious.

Alsohuman · 13/04/2021 08:11

@DandelionSprout

Do you worry about him catching a cold? This isn’t a cold. It’s a virus which has caused a huge number of deaths and made our economy literally grind to a halt. It’s so serious that we’ve been locked in our houses for a year. So unsurprisingly I don’t want him to catch it if it’s that serious.
It’s not serious for a child, it barely affects them.
OllietheOwl · 13/04/2021 08:14

@DandelionSprout for children, especially very little ones it’s the same as a cold. They have hardly any symptoms. The rate of death is absolutely minuscule. Far more risk of them being injured or dying in many other ways that you probably would do every day (ie a car ride).
Keeping your child inside for fear of Covid is far more detrimental to their lives.

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