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Original poster

Please help me to find a reason to go on :(

39 replies

fireflylanegirls · 25/03/2021 21:04

I can’t do this anymore, I really really can’t.

I’ve spent over a year hidden away, frightened.

I had my first baby last year and I’ve spend that time with very little support.
No mum & baby groups, no family support.

I’m petrified of Covid and becoming severely
ill or death.

I had the vaccine 15 days ago and even that hasn’t eased my anxiety because all the news about the Oxford vaccine is just so negative.

I wake up most days and I just want to scream, it feels too hard to get through the day because all I can think is what is the point.

I’m not living, it’s existing.

There’s just so much negative news right now.

I feel like I have nothing left on me :(

OP posts:
Onedaysomedaynowadays · 25/03/2021 21:06

Bless you, it's a tough time. Sending love x

Cantstandsmugness · 25/03/2021 21:09

It will fine - do you have a live in partner?
Please call your GP - don’t read the news.

Your chances of being very poorly are very slim. Think of your lovey baby that needs you very much x take care - this will all be a distant dream in a couple of years

Original poster
fireflylanegirls · 25/03/2021 21:10

@Cantstandsmugness

It will fine - do you have a live in partner? Please call your GP - don’t read the news. Your chances of being very poorly are very slim. Think of your lovey baby that needs you very much x take care - this will all be a distant dream in a couple of years
@Cantstandsmugness

Yes I have my husband.

My GP prescribed Sertraline but I haven’t felt any better with them just yet 😔

OP posts:
windowstothesoul · 25/03/2021 21:12

It is has been such a tough year - sorry to hear you are feeling like this. How is your little one doing?

Can you put some plans in for 29th March? April 12th June 21st? So you have things to look forward to?

Do you have family near by? Or a partner? Is there someone you can be honest about how you feel, in real life?

Sorry for the million questions - if you are feeling low tonight you can call Samaritans or Mind - there are people that can support you.

MarshaBradyo · 25/03/2021 21:12

That sounds tough and you need support

Even if I say Oxford data is actually very hood it probably won’t help much at this point

Keep going with ADs

Dizzywizz · 25/03/2021 21:13

You poor thing. How long have you been on Sertraline? I think they can take some time to start working. I also find doing some yoga helps. I used to do baby yoga when my children were small - lots of videos on you tube to try

PurpleDaisies · 25/03/2021 21:13

I had the vaccine 15 days ago and even that hasn’t eased my anxiety because all the news about the Oxford vaccine is just so negative.

Is it? What specifically are you worried about? It’s been shown to be highly effective in all age groups as well as safe.

cinammonbuns · 25/03/2021 21:14

@fireflylanegirls ar et où the same poster who posted about going back to work and sending your DD to nursery.

If you are you’ve had loads of advice on previous threads that you should really go back to your GP and ask for more intensive treatment for your anxiety.

cinammonbuns · 25/03/2021 21:14

Sorry *are you

bumbleymummy · 25/03/2021 21:16

Apparently it can take a few weeks for them to work and anxiety can actually feel a bit worse at first. Well done for speaking to your GP.

It is a really horrible time at the moment but things are starting to open up and it’s coming in to the better weather. There will be lots of lonely things you can do with your little one.

bumbleymummy · 25/03/2021 21:16

Lovely things*

Original poster
fireflylanegirls · 25/03/2021 21:17

@windowstothesoul

It is has been such a tough year - sorry to hear you are feeling like this. How is your little one doing?

Can you put some plans in for 29th March? April 12th June 21st? So you have things to look forward to?

Do you have family near by? Or a partner? Is there someone you can be honest about how you feel, in real life?

Sorry for the million questions - if you are feeling low tonight you can call Samaritans or Mind - there are people that can support you.

@windowstothesoul

I’ve made some plans but I’m finding it really difficult.
I don’t see the point because it just feels like things are never going to get back to normal.😭

I have my husband.

Yes I think maybe I do need to call someone.

OP posts:
Fembot123 · 25/03/2021 21:18

Oh lamb, give the sertraline a little longer, it takes a couple of weeks to bed in. You’ve done so well getting through it and we are at the tail end now, you will be fine and hopefully be feeling a bit better soon and able to enjoy the Spring.

Original poster
fireflylanegirls · 25/03/2021 21:18

[quote cinammonbuns]@fireflylanegirls ar et où the same poster who posted about going back to work and sending your DD to nursery.

If you are you’ve had loads of advice on previous threads that you should really go back to your GP and ask for more intensive treatment for your anxiety.[/quote]
@cinammonbuns

I’ve spoken to my GP. I have Sertraline and I’m having CBT.

I can’t help the way I feel. I don’t think medication or therapy is going to take away what Covid has done to my mental health.
Covid isn’t going anywhere and I don’t know how
to live with this fear.

OP posts:
windowstothesoul · 25/03/2021 21:18

Admitting you need help is a good step - recognising your emotions is key - it's shit but it can and will get better.

Is it anxiety that is leading or a depression/low feeling?

Peachee · 25/03/2021 21:19

Hi, I felt like this up until returning to work. Are you still on mat leave?
Don’t read or watch the news. I used to quite like morning Britain but the barrage of negativity is definitely triggering for me and I only find out a few days down the line of watching it. Breakfast tv/news is banned in our house. We watch gogglebox now.
Also get out when you can. If you can get yourself a carrier that would be brilliant but it helped me with my confidence as I didn’t trust myself out and about on my own with my baby initially.

This is not easy and I agree such a slog. I really hate it. I was on antidepressants (which helped) up until I became pregnant again.

Workinghardeveryday · 25/03/2021 21:20

Hun, you don’t need to feel this way if you’re not CEV!! Sounds a bit like postnatal depression to me. Give your doc another ring, tell them how you’re feeling. Ring someone you can openly talk to and share your worries. It’s so hard having a baby at the best of times.

How long have you been on sertraline? It takes a while to work. Maybe it doesn’t suit you if it’s been a while - but there are others to try.

Don’t loose hope. Put it in perspective, you’ve had your first jab, your so much more protected than before!! Don’t let you’re worries run away with you.

Honestly, I am super paranoid of Covid believe me! I am CEV and have kids at school so it’s a big worry - but I really think you need to put it into perspective, like actually question your worries.

You’re okay hun really xxx

cinammonbuns · 25/03/2021 21:22

I think that going back to work would really help. I’ve noticed a big difference in my friends who have kept themselves occupied with work during the pandemic and those mainly stuck at home. And as you send your child to school and realise you are not catching Covid and are not getting very sick, perhaps your worry will begin to reduce.

Have you arranged the date you are going back to work?

Cantstandsmugness · 25/03/2021 21:22

Weather is warmer - go to the park.
You will find other mums - you need a peer group, it will help a lot. Everyone is struggling but it is difficult to see this. everyone will be happy to chat. You can do this, one foot in front of the other, we are all behind you/with you x

Queenie6655 · 25/03/2021 21:23

Meds can make you feel a little worse for a short while
Then you will notice great improvements

Many can relate to your post xxxxx

Suzi888 · 25/03/2021 21:23

Things will go back to normal, but it’s going to take time. You’ve been vaccinated, if anything were going to happen as a result of that it already would have.
Restrictions are slowly easing, I know it’s painfully slow. Don’t read the news, take a walk if you can with your baby, could you try some exercise or meditation?
Give your tablets some time to work, eat well and drink lots of water.
The Samaritans are always around if you need to talk or see your GP again if you are struggling badly. Take care Flowers

Griefmonster · 25/03/2021 21:32

I am on sertraline and find it very effective for my anxiety. It takes around 6 weeks to kick in and you feel worse before you feel better.

My main thoughts ate -
How long since you started medication?

Have you started CBT?

Do you have any routines? E.g. getting outdoors, meal times etc.

I do a lot of meditation and have a mindfulness app I use a lot. Lots of breathing and 'noting' etc.

Speak to your health visitor if you can. She might be able to help with advice and support to get you through next few weeks.

VolvoEagle · 25/03/2021 21:34

fireflylanegirls, where do you live?

I recommend planning some fun things to do at home with your little one - Baby Club and Toddler Club on CBeebies are very good.

There's loads of good stuff on YouTube as well - I like Sing Along with Britt Adams.

You could download the Peanut app - it's a good way to make new mummy friends - getting out to the park etc. with a fellow mum could be really good for you.

I also recommend having a look at the Made by Mammas podcast, there are some really great episodes that you can download. The hosts don't shy away from topics such as depression, losing your identity when you have a baby etc.

Sending lots of love 💘

BestOption · 25/03/2021 21:36

Hi

How old is your Son or Daughter now?
I think a lot of new mums have struggled with the isolation this year & things not being how they expected when they were planning their first child.

From what I've read & heard, the first 3 weeks on S can be awful, making you feel worse than before, but that the cloud starts to lift 3-4 weeks in.

How has your husband been with you & the baby snd the mind numbing jobs that need doing?

Do you know you can form a bubble with a family member or friend when you have a baby? As well as a bubble with a person who lives alone (or lives with children under 18) plus various other exemptions?!

I bet there's a friend or neighbour who would love to bubble with you & your baby.

You need to listen to different news! The news re Astra Zeneca is actually brilliant! Hugely effective against severe Covid and in the YS study completed recently 100% effective against death.

I was very scared in the first lockdown (health conditions, obese, in my 50's) and would wake up and immediately feel scared. It was dreadful. So I know where you're coming from, but the rates have come down
a lot and are still slowly reducing, the vaccine has reduced the numbers getting very ill and treatment had got much much better.

I'm feeling a lot less scared now.

Are you taking the baby out for a walk every day?

🤗🍫🌸

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