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Original poster

I feel like I’m waiting to fall ill

46 replies

QuietBatPeople1 · 12/03/2021 22:10

And it’s tiring. I struggle with anxiety and the past year hasn’t helped. My daughter started school on Monday which I’m happy about but very very anxious as well. Now I wake up everyday thinking ‘today will be the day Covid enters our house’ - I’ve followed/follow every rule- but now it feels silly as I’ll catch it eventually from my daughter.

OP posts:
Lupinhere37 · 13/03/2021 02:28

I know exactly how you feel. I’ve felt like this each time my DD has been in school. I’ve been prepared for illness for a whole year and it’s exhausting, mentally. I really wish I wasn’t so anxious about this but I am.
I’ve been so strict with the “rules” and yet I keep thinking “it’s only a matter of time”.
I had the first dose vaccine yesterday and now I keep thinking that it would be bloody bad luck to catch it when she goes back to school on 22nd.

Waxonwaxoff0 · 13/03/2021 06:11

It's not inevitable. My DS has been at school the whole time, I work out of the home and there was a big Covid outbreak at my work in January. Neither of us has had Covid and I know we haven't because I am participating in the ONS study so I've been getting tested regularly.

Numbers are still falling. The time where you were most likely to catch it has passed. When are you due your vaccination?

Inthevirtualwaitingroom · 13/03/2021 06:56

For most people it will be mild op,
and we have so many precautions.

Whatalottachocca · 13/03/2021 07:30

I work in a school and have been in throughout the last year. I do all my shopping in a large supermarket, went to the cinema (when it was open in the summer) and to restaurants and pubs when they were open. I've walked with friends a hole of times a week during times of lockdown. I haven't had Covid, nor have any of my family or friends. It's not inevitable that you'll get it.

Original poster
QuietBatPeople1 · 19/03/2021 10:27

Woke up today with an overwhelming feeling of dread. Hate feeling like this all the tomr

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Original poster
QuietBatPeople1 · 19/03/2021 10:27

*time

OP posts:
Seriouslymole · 19/03/2021 10:32

Honestly, I think you need to get help for your anxiety. It is exhausting to live in this kind of fear the whole time and not good for you at all. It is also completely illogical.

I have no idea if this will make you feel any better but I have two children in two different schools (one primary and one secondary) and a DH who is a teacher in a different school two days a week who also teaches in two other schools on other days of the week. We have been like this throughout the pandemic. Neither of us have had vaccinations. That is a total of 5 different schools "in" our house. We have not even had a sniff of Covid.

The likelihood is you will be absolutely fine but mentally you need to speak to someone. You do not want your fear to pass to your DD. The risk of her being out of school is far greater than her risk of being in school.

Original poster
QuietBatPeople1 · 19/03/2021 11:29

Yes I am resigning help for my anxiety- cbt and have spoken to go as well.

My daughter is in school and will be going as long it’s open. It is very important to her and I recognise the benefits as well.

However I’m really struggling. We are not vaccinated and are under 50. I just feel so low and scared all the time.

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Branleuse · 19/03/2021 11:54

My kids are getting tested at school twice a week. Is that not what is happening in most schools?

ssd · 19/03/2021 12:04

I understand @QuietBatPeople1

To me, if you a bit of an anxious worrier, covid has magnified that 100%

And when you're like this, all sense flies out the window. You know your risk is small if you get it, but you imagine everything going wrong.

I'm the same. I'm getting counselling, cbt didn't really help me. I totally know it makes sense what they say, but getting my brain to accept it is another thing.

Dont know the answer, but just wanted you to know you aren't alone.

Original poster
QuietBatPeople1 · 19/03/2021 12:06

Thank you @ssd. Yes you are right in everything you wrote. All risks seem amplified at the moment. I’m not sure if CBT is helping as well. I’ve got an appointment next week to discuss other treatments.

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Original poster
QuietBatPeople1 · 19/03/2021 12:08

@Branleuse not in my daughters school. She is in primary. It’s the secondary schools which are being tested. The teachers are required to do LFTs at home.

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ekidmxcl · 19/03/2021 12:11

Many are suffering like this op. There are too many 40s with kids in schools and IMO they need vaccinating quickly. People are being forced to take risks that many are uncomfortable with.

ssd · 19/03/2021 12:20

@ekidmxcl

Many are suffering like this op. There are too many 40s with kids in schools and IMO they need vaccinating quickly. People are being forced to take risks that many are uncomfortable with.
Yes, and not just with regards schools. I'm working in a supermarket just now and am super anxious. But I need the money. There's so many of us out here feeling similar. I tend to think everyone else is just getting on with it, so why can't I? But its never that simple. I think we all have to find our own ways to cope. @QuietBatPeople1, do you have any asymptomatic testing centres nearby? We have that here, it might be a good way for you to test on the off chance dd has it. So saying that, my dh got it last year. Off work for 3 weeks....me and ds didn't catch it off him. Its weird how it works.
XiCi · 19/03/2021 12:24

I have health anxiety so know exactly how you feel. Ive actually just recovered from Covid and tbh wish that I'd had it right at the beginning of all this as it was very mild and all of the anxiety was for nothing. I feel like a massive weight has been lifted. The hysterical media reporting just fuels anxiety for everyone when the vast majority will only have mild symptoms or none (1 in 3 are asymptomatic. In my household DH and DD both were). So I guess I'm saying try not to worry, even if the worst happened and you got it you are very likely to be just fine

OliveTree75 · 19/03/2021 12:29

I agree with @XiCi. Just had covid as well and I have had worse colds! Caught it off my DP and he was fine too. It isn't inevitable. My DP works in a factory with thousands of people. There have been lots of cases but it has taken him a year of being amongst it everyday to catch it.

Original poster
QuietBatPeople1 · 19/03/2021 12:49

Glad you had it mild and all well now @XiCi and @OliveTree75

It is such a difficult time for people with anxiety- I don’t know where to turn. Covid fears, vaccine questions all rolled into one.

It truly is exhausting- one minute it us all about under 40s are not in as much risk next minute the ICU is full of under 40s!

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XiCi · 19/03/2021 12:53

Its such a head fuck isn't it OP. Now I'm worried about getting the vaccine because the side effects people are talking about on here sound far far worse than having Covid. I think I just need to step away and stop reading about it tbh

polelynn · 19/03/2021 13:13

Just another checking in to say I completely understand and feel likewise. I've had to start on medication and am awaiting therapy to deal with my anxiety and now, joy of joys, OCD traits over all this. The news about the vaccine is definitely not helping either. In my rational moments how I behave and feel seems absolutely absurd but that's anxiety for you.

ArseInTheCoOpWindow · 19/03/2021 13:17

Me too. I have anxiety anyway, and this has just tipped it up.

I’ve had a vaccine a week ago and thought I’d feel better, but l don’t.

ssd · 19/03/2021 13:21

@QuietBatPeople1, are you in Scotland?

Original poster
QuietBatPeople1 · 19/03/2021 13:30

@polelynn I understand how you feel as well. You are not alone.

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Original poster
QuietBatPeople1 · 19/03/2021 13:30

@ssd no- I’m in East Anglia

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Original poster
QuietBatPeople1 · 19/03/2021 13:32

@ArseInTheCoOpWindow agree. I thought once the vaccine roll out started I and many like me will feel better. Actually I feel worse now, with all the conversations and push around vaccine makes me very nervous. It feels different to ‘ it’s winter, we have flu jabs available’ and I go and get one. This seems to come with a pressure and that doesn’t sit well with me.

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ssd · 19/03/2021 14:36

Maybe you have been on mn and social media too much @QuietBatPeople1..I feel like I'm swamped with information and its too much sometimes.

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