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Original poster

DH doesn’t want to wash his hands

95 replies

teachocolate · 01/03/2021 09:24

Sorry it’s a silly question but just had an argument with DH.
He doesn’t like washing hands but somehow trying to do. I saw many times he just washed hands without soap for only 2 or 3 seconds after he drops off kids or short walk. So this morning I asked him to wash with soap. Then, he said he doesn’t want because his skin is sensitive and he drove to nursery by car and didn’t touch anything. Then, he claimed that there is a famous scientist who says we don’t need to wash with soap and if he will not use soap unless the specialist changes his opinion. Sigh.... then he asked me scientific proof for washing hands with soap and I totally fed up. He shut the door and went out. How do you think? Do we need to wash hands with soap even if it’s after short drive to nursery? Am I being unreasonable? Do you wash hands with soap after short drive or short walk?

Anyway I don’t think his skin is sensitive.

OP posts:
babbaloushka · 01/03/2021 10:43

Microbiologist here, the detergent in the soap breaks down the cell membrane of bacteria and most viruses, so they lose their ability to feed and reproduce. Obviously it's very complicated but that's the crux of it. This is very elementary knowledge, i remember my DC doing an experiment about it before GCSE level. Tell him to give his head a wobble and ask him if he would be OK with his Dentist not washing his hands, or his surgeon.

user1497207191 · 01/03/2021 10:45

Your DH is just a lazy sod. End of. Not washing hands is gross. He'll be picking up all kinds of bacteria etc and spreading them around the house.

user1497207191 · 01/03/2021 10:48

More that if you don’t actually touch anything what exactly is the risk? The air isn’t full of Covid circulating and landing on people’s hands.

It's impossible not to touch anything. Unless your car and house have automatic opening doors!

user1497207191 · 01/03/2021 10:49

@Brokenrecord3006

Are people washing their hands every time they come back into the house?! I've not noticed anyone doing this. I understand if he isn't washing his hands when he has used the loo, but I think you're being a bit extreme.
Err yes. We've always washed on hands as soon as we get in the house. Nothing new there, we've been doing it for decades, long before covid.
Lynora · 01/03/2021 10:51

@babbaloushka

Microbiologist here, the detergent in the soap breaks down the cell membrane of bacteria and most viruses, so they lose their ability to feed and reproduce. Obviously it's very complicated but that's the crux of it. This is very elementary knowledge, i remember my DC doing an experiment about it before GCSE level. Tell him to give his head a wobble and ask him if he would be OK with his Dentist not washing his hands, or his surgeon.
He is not going to perform any sort of medical procedure though, so that comparison is a bit daft.
Heyahun · 01/03/2021 10:55

The steering wheel is full of bloody Germs! Covid is still around - yes I would be annoyed too tbh! He’s putting his gross dirty hands all over the door handles and surfaces of your house !

Heyahun · 01/03/2021 10:56

And everyone I know is washing hands as soon as they return to the house after being out every single time - gawd no wonder we are getting nowhere with the spread of the virus going by the amount of people on this thread thinking that it’s overkill ffs

ThePricklySheep · 01/03/2021 10:57

@Heyahun

The steering wheel is full of bloody Germs! Covid is still around - yes I would be annoyed too tbh! He’s putting his gross dirty hands all over the door handles and surfaces of your house !
Germs from where though? If he didn’t touch anything in the meantime?
dementedpixie · 01/03/2021 11:02

Covid is not spreading in huge numbers by touching a steering wheel or going for a walk.

Cases are dropping now so it is spreading less

TheTeenageYears · 01/03/2021 11:04

He has a responsibility to himself, his family and others to do everything he can to not spread covid and other bacteria. I have long since decided that from a personal perspective washing my hands with soap is my best protection against catching covid myself and to protect others in not spreading if I have touched a surface and transferred it somewhere others will be affected. I do no touch my eyes, nose or mouth, pick up something to eat with my fingers without first washing my hands with soap - it's the best defence against catching covid.

user1497207191 · 01/03/2021 11:05

@dementedpixie

Covid is not spreading in huge numbers by touching a steering wheel or going for a walk. Cases are dropping now so it is spreading less
Covid isn't the only bug/disease.

Not washing hands is one of the main reasons why norovirus spreads so widely.

Heyahun · 01/03/2021 11:05

I bet he never cleans the steering wheel either though.

I dunno - I think it’s pretty gross to go out and not wash hands in return to the house - it’s not like it’s a difficult task! He can put a bit of hand cream on after if his hands are irritated or dry!

nordica · 01/03/2021 11:15

It's always so surprising to me to hear people's thoughts on handwashing.

My parents were a doctor and a nurse and I was taught to always wash my hands when coming home. It's just basic hygiene. Of course you're touching lots of surfaces anywhere you go.

Original poster
teachocolate · 01/03/2021 11:15

We agreed stop arguments but he claims he will continue his way. I gave up.

I know he touched nursery gate, door bell, car and steering wheels. But I understand that he is grownup and it makes him annoyed to ask hand wash as some PPs say.

It’s funny that DH always says to kids to wash hands properly with soap but he doesn’tHmm

OP posts:
ChameleonClara · 01/03/2021 11:15

I think it’s pretty gross to go out and not wash hands in return to the house yes, that's how I feel, I don't understand why you wouldn't, it is 30 seconds only.

I think covid has really highlighted how little people washed their hands.

frazzledasarock · 01/03/2021 11:18

All these threads reinforce for me I do not wish to be shaking hands with people ever again. Bleurghhh

Okbutnotgreat · 01/03/2021 11:21

Tbh the first thing I thought was I wouldn’t want him to prepare any food for me ever if he doesn’t wash his hands with soap.

Original poster
teachocolate · 01/03/2021 11:21

He just told me that he is much cleaner than other men. He washes hands even for 2 seconds without soap after toilet although most men don’tConfused

OP posts:
MrsBotibolsCruise · 01/03/2021 11:21

I assumed that washing your hands when you get home is basic hygiene? Like washing your hands before meals and after using the loo?

I wash my toddlers hands without fail every day when she gets in from nursery. To be fair she then has her lunch but I think I’d do it even if she didn’t. It’s setting up good habits for a lifetime.

I’m in no way obsessive or unreasonable about dirt/germs. My house isn’t even that clean - handwashing in certain circumstances just seems basic.

user1497207191 · 01/03/2021 11:22

@frazzledasarock

All these threads reinforce for me I do not wish to be shaking hands with people ever again. Bleurghhh
Yes, it's probably the only good thing to come out of the pandemic if it means we can stop shaking hands. It's disgusting. In my office, I've always had a few "tricks" to avoid it, such as having a pile of files in my hands when I meet someone coming in for a meeting. They can't go for the hand-shake if you don't have a free hand!
user1497207191 · 01/03/2021 11:25

Someone like the OP's husband wouldn't have got to become my husband if he didn't have good hygiene habits. I've ditched boyfriends early in relationships for similar! I can't imagine he suddenly got bad habits like that, did the OP not notice years ago that he didn't wash his hands?

peak2021 · 01/03/2021 11:26

I assume given he ignores the recommendations of experts he thinks Michael Gove is a decent person?

frazzledasarock · 01/03/2021 11:26

@MrsBotibolsCruise

I assumed that washing your hands when you get home is basic hygiene? Like washing your hands before meals and after using the loo?

I wash my toddlers hands without fail every day when she gets in from nursery. To be fair she then has her lunch but I think I’d do it even if she didn’t. It’s setting up good habits for a lifetime.

I’m in no way obsessive or unreasonable about dirt/germs. My house isn’t even that clean - handwashing in certain circumstances just seems basic.

you have clearly not read the many many threads on here where MNers state quite unequivocally they do not wash hands after using the loo... urine is sterile dontcha know Envy
lottiegarbanzo · 01/03/2021 11:26

If he wants to make a case to try to persuade you that something he's heard and probably misinterpreted from one scientist, supersedes everything every medical advisor has said about hand-washing and covid, that really is up to him to waste his time on .

Obvs he thinks climate change is a myth, creationism is correct and the world is flat too?! Yes but, one scientist!!!

Xerochrysum · 01/03/2021 11:27

It's really weird some people find a source of argument through such a small things, backed up by scientific fats of their choice.
If I go outside, first thing I do is wash my hands. Tell the dc to do the same too, even before covid. It's basic hygiene as pp says.
If he can be bothered to wash his hands for 2/3 seconds, what's the big deal about using soap and taking slightly longer?