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Original poster

DH doesn’t want to wash his hands

95 replies

teachocolate · 01/03/2021 09:24

Sorry it’s a silly question but just had an argument with DH.
He doesn’t like washing hands but somehow trying to do. I saw many times he just washed hands without soap for only 2 or 3 seconds after he drops off kids or short walk. So this morning I asked him to wash with soap. Then, he said he doesn’t want because his skin is sensitive and he drove to nursery by car and didn’t touch anything. Then, he claimed that there is a famous scientist who says we don’t need to wash with soap and if he will not use soap unless the specialist changes his opinion. Sigh.... then he asked me scientific proof for washing hands with soap and I totally fed up. He shut the door and went out. How do you think? Do we need to wash hands with soap even if it’s after short drive to nursery? Am I being unreasonable? Do you wash hands with soap after short drive or short walk?

Anyway I don’t think his skin is sensitive.

OP posts:
ChameleonClara · 01/03/2021 09:59

He will have touched things, the car, kids shoes/bags, stuff from nursery, nursery gate or buzzer..

Brokenrecord3006 · 01/03/2021 10:00

Are people washing their hands every time they come back into the house?! I've not noticed anyone doing this. I understand if he isn't washing his hands when he has used the loo, but I think you're being a bit extreme.

Original poster
teachocolate · 01/03/2021 10:00

Thank you for comments. It’s good to know how others think.

I don’t know how he washes his hands after toilet.

He cooks and eats without hand wash. I don’t always monitor him but I could see him because he often washes hands in kitchen as he grabs a drink after walk or drive.

I don’t know who the scientist is.

OP posts:
dementedpixie · 01/03/2021 10:02

How often are you nagging him to wash his hands?
Going on about something all the time would make me do the opposite too

Porridgeoat · 01/03/2021 10:03

Send him this

www.nhs.uk/live-well/healthy-body/best-way-to-wash-your-hands/

dementedpixie · 01/03/2021 10:05

You've just said he does wash his hands.

ChameleonClara · 01/03/2021 10:06

@Brokenrecord3006

Are people washing their hands every time they come back into the house?! I've not noticed anyone doing this. I understand if he isn't washing his hands when he has used the loo, but I think you're being a bit extreme.
Yes, I have done this for about twenty years but I worked in catering years ago where you washed hands on arrival so maybe I was trained young!
CheeseJalapenoBread · 01/03/2021 10:06

His hands and he’s an adult. Is he just driving to the nursery in his own car and not getting out?

Porridgeoat · 01/03/2021 10:08

Does he have any other sensory issues?

steppemum · 01/03/2021 10:08

The reason you need soap.
Ok, given that there is much less evidenc eof transmission via surfaces, if you do touch something and get Covid on your hands you need to use soap because.

Water on its own does not wash the vaccine off your skin. Viruses are coverd in an oily coating, which means they don't easly get washed away in water and don't attach to water moecules. Soap molecules have two ends, one end is attracted to oil/fat, and the virus attaches to this end, the other end likeswater and so you end up with a ball shape, virus in the middle, soap round the outside, water on the outside. This then breaks open the virus, rendering it usless, and then the soap chemically picks up the virus, and then it is washed away with the soap.
Here it is explained with pictures

soap and Corona
there

dementedpixie · 01/03/2021 10:09

I dont wash my hands every time I come in the house. Covid is more of a respiratory based virus and mask wearing and social distancing helps mitigate against spread. Just being outside the house doesn't mean you have covid on your hands

Porridgeoat · 01/03/2021 10:09

The guidance in the links above show very clear advice about when to wash hands

Original poster
teachocolate · 01/03/2021 10:10

To be fair, I have asthma and use steroid inhaler everyday, so maybe I am a bit too sensitive about it.

DH is usually not careless because he stopped smoking when we married and I was so glad.

OP posts:
Original poster
teachocolate · 01/03/2021 10:13

He just came to me and said he would never send kids to nursery/school because he doesn’t want to wash hands.... we have three kids in different nursery/school. How it’s possible for me to manage alone after school reopeningConfused

OP posts:
OliveTree75 · 01/03/2021 10:17

What do you mean? He won't take them on a morning? I think you are over focusing on the risk from your husbands handwashing. You have 3 kids in different settings. They will be touching things constantly and not washing their hands every 5 mins.

MrsBotibolsCruise · 01/03/2021 10:17

He’s being an idiot.

Hand washing with soap after being outside is probably the best defence against contracting any infection, much better than using crappy hand gel most of which isn’t even virucidal. Does he wash his hands after using the loo?!

I have really bad hand eczema which is made ten times worse by frequent washing. But I do it to protect me and my family.

Get him some unscented neutrogena hand cream and tell him to stop being so manky.

Cheeeeislifenow · 01/03/2021 10:17

He sounds lazy. He doesn't wash his hands before food prep?
Did he touch the handle to the nursery? A door buzzer? It also sets a good example to the children. He is just being lazy imo.

Disressingtimes · 01/03/2021 10:17

@Rillington

I wouldn't wash my hands after a short walk or drive. I have only touched my own car. If you have touched other things then yes.
Presumably you have got into the car, touching handle & keys, after shopping so it would be an idea to wash hands when you enter the home even if you just drive down the road.

Covid is more of a respiratory based virus and mask wearing and social distancing helps mitigate against spread
I imagine you use hands to remove your mask.

Oysterbabe · 01/03/2021 10:21

I don't wash my hands after a walk or drive.

PoochiePlush · 01/03/2021 10:23

@Brokenrecord3006

Are people washing their hands every time they come back into the house?! I've not noticed anyone doing this. I understand if he isn't washing his hands when he has used the loo, but I think you're being a bit extreme.
Yes, always have done. It's gross that adults are only learning this after a pandemic...(and still not doing it)
Original poster
teachocolate · 01/03/2021 10:32

I am happy to send kids to nursery/school. Education is important and they need to be socialised with other kids. I can accept the risk.

It’s interesting to hear that some people don’t wash after short walk or drive.

OP posts:
RedcurrantPuff · 01/03/2021 10:37

Fucking hell, he’s a grown man not a toddler, what the hell are you doing pestering him about handwashing? Stop being so controlling. I might not always wash mine if I’ve been out only in my car and not touched anything.

Original poster
teachocolate · 01/03/2021 10:38

I will suggest to use sanitiser... I want to finish this silly argument with him.

Honestly, I want him to wash his hands properly but I understand he is grownup and cannot force it as some of you say... So probably suggest sanitiser to compromise each other... hope he says ok.

OP posts:
RedcurrantPuff · 01/03/2021 10:41

@teachocolate

I am happy to send kids to nursery/school. Education is important and they need to be socialised with other kids. I can accept the risk.

It’s interesting to hear that some people don’t wash after short walk or drive.

Not really “interesting”. More that if you don’t actually touch anything what exactly is the risk? The air isn’t full of Covid circulating and landing on people’s hands.
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