People saying ‘we’ve had a year of this’ - what did you do last summer?

[Bubbinsmakesthree]

I keep seeing people saying things like “my child hasn’t played with anyone else in a year” or “I’ve not seen any friends in a year”. I know some people have been shielding or live in areas that have had tougher restrictions for longer...but if not, what were you doing last summer?

I think I’ve been fairly cautious but we still managed holidays/trips away in the UK, lots of (socially distanced) meet ups with friends and family and my children saw lots of their friends. We’ve been to museums, meals out, swimming etc. Other than children not social distancing with each other I don’t we broke any rules. It certainly wasn’t a normal summer but in comparison with the current (really miserable) lockdown things were pretty decent.

Lots of people I know were regularly in bars, making cinema trips, foreign holidays and taking the children soft play (i drew the line well before it got to soft play myself!)

Are people forgetting what actually happened or did some people remain in voluntary lockdown all year?

@MadinMarch thank you. I'm most likely over sensitive TBH. I now understand what you meant and I overreacted.

@MilesJuppIsMyBitch I’m sorry I misquoted you. My comment was aimed at those people who weren’t shielding or clinically vulnerable and chose not to do things they could have within the guidelines.

Last summer we did not socialise outside of our household! As per guidelines. The only exception we made was to visit a new baby in the family and we were wfh anyway, visit was in the garden.

If your kids played with non family members under 2m away you broke the guidelines

@Hagotcha80

We will have to agree to disagree as I think starting a thread like this does come across as gloating when it is clear from many other threads that people have had an awful year.

I also don’t agree that people chose to impose self isolation. Those who were shielding did but many others, like me, just chose to be cautious for many different reasons.

@freckles20

The rules in Leicester were brutal, never came out of lockdown. We had to rescue my dd from there as she was close to being sectioned, couldn't cope. She's fine medically with us (as fine as she ever is with an underlying lifelong mental health condition) but missing her friends of course.

[quote HerculesMuligan]@MilesJuppIsMyBitch I’m sorry I misquoted you. My comment was aimed at those people who weren’t shielding or clinically vulnerable and chose not to do things they could have within the guidelines.[/quote]
Thanks. My view is that no one is at their best at the moment, & we should all be cutting one another a bit of slack.

The weird thing about being in my position is that - until last March - I felt the same as everyone else, so all these threads stating "oh, we don't mean you" feel very othering and strange.

In lockdown last summer, DD is 4 so can’t socially distance and DH is ECV. Other than school when she hasn’t really played with her friends.

[quote Shibees]@Hagotcha80

We will have to agree to disagree as I think starting a thread like this does come across as gloating when it is clear from many other threads that people have had an awful year.

I also don’t agree that people chose to impose self isolation. Those who were shielding did but many others, like me, just chose to be cautious for many different reasons.[/quote]
“Cautious” is very different from self imposed isolation

Yes back to my point - you see it as gloating because you didn’t do it.

Angry that others were doing that - fair enough. Your decision to respond like that.

But you are seeing the intention behind a post as gloating when in fact, just outlining activities they did and they enjoyment they derived from it.

@Hagotcha80

Cautious” is very different from self imposed isolation

Yes back to my point - you see it as gloating because you didn’t do it.

Angry that others were doing that - fair enough. Your decision to respond like that.

But you are seeing the intention behind a post as gloating when in fact, just outlining activities they did and they enjoyment they derived from it.

I am not angry at all that people chose to enjoy the activities that were open to them. I admire their laid back approach and ability to gallivant around after months of rules, stay at home messages & fear instilled by the media. It takes a lot to bounce back from that so quickly.

But why list all the wonderful activities that were enjoyed during the summer if there isn’t an element of showing off & almost surprise that others weren’t doing the same?!

OK, but can we not think about tone & timing?

Eg, personally my life improved in January, as my poor kids suddenly had online lessons from the school rather than just non-teacher me. We've had other good news as well, plus I'm now booked in for the vaccine.

Did I start a thread asking why everyone was so gloomy as my life was now so much better?

No. It would have been crass and insensitive.

So while I don't condemn the OP and others for their actions, I do question their self-awareness & empathy. 🤷‍♀️

@MilesJuppIsMyBitch

OK, but can we not think about tone & timing?

Eg, personally my life improved in January, as my poor kids suddenly had online lessons from the school rather than just non-teacher me. We've had other good news as well, plus I'm now booked in for the vaccine.

Did I start a thread asking why everyone was so gloomy as my life was now so much better?

No. It would have been crass and insensitive.

So while I don't condemn the OP and others for their actions, I do question their self-awareness & empathy. 🤷‍♀️

This!

Very very little. Because I didn't feel that what we could do was safe. The rise in infections in the autumn was in part due to increased mixing allowed in the summer so I'm glad I didn't do much.

For example I went to the cinema twice late at night with 2 or 3 other in the screen. I went to a beer garden twice. I ate in a restaurant 3 times but it was open plan self serve yo sushi. So yeah not much.

We will have to agree to disagree as I think starting a thread like this does come across as gloating when it is clear from many other threads that people have had an awful year.

I agree with this. Talking about what a fabulous summer you had and expressing disbelief that others didn't have the same experience as you just displays a real lack of understanding of other peoples perspectives.

Nobody is making the argument that we've had one, solid lockdown from March 2020 - March 2021.

We've had a year of misery, with a short-lived phase of weirdness that was still incredibly dystopian, but by standards relative to lockdown was "kind of normal".

It's been an absolutely horrific year no matter how you want to look at it. You're also forgetting all the people who have been shielding due to health issues.

A school bubble is just for that, school. Children then mixing outside of school just because they were/are in the same bubble at school (which has additional measures in place such as face-masks in corridors, high-contact touch points cleaned regularly throughout the day etc) increases the risk of transmission because you are increasing contact. They can mix outside of school but under the law in England they have always been included in number restrictions re households/max of 6 in a gathering etc over the summer and required to socially distance in the same way as every other person.

Yeah the summer was pretty good have to say! Met friends in the park, pub beer gardens, went out for dinner, went on holidays in the U.K., went to museums, cinema,

Managed to go to Ireland for a month to see my family

Yea all these things were a little risky. But they were allowed - it was up to you to ensure you were socially distancing in any of the scenarios.

If you didn’t do anything with that time when restrictions eased that was your choice tbh

The thing is, things never got 'back to normal', and you never should have been in close contact with other families.

I haven't hugged my own parents or grandparents for almost a year.

The only difference last summer was that me and DP managed to get out and about further afield for some days out and better walks, and a few distanced garden visits with my family when it was sunny.

But even so, this has certainly lasted for a long time, and will probably be similar this summer too.

If you didn’t do anything with that time when restrictions eased that was your choice tbh

Lots of people live in areas where restrictions were never eased or eased for less than 3 weeks.

“Lots of people live in areas where restrictions were never eased or eased for less than 3 weeks”

So true - many people seem to forget that.

Those people are entitled to say they’ve had a year of this @SueEllenMishke

Because that’s actually true!

But heaps of people had restrictions massively lifted for ages in the summer

We definitely didn't do much over the summer, just regular swimming and bowling which was really restricted so no crowds. We didn't go on holiday or eat out anywhere or visit family indoors. I work in the NHS and was wary of potentially spreading it, either from work to outside of it or vice versa as I am a midwife and am really careful about keeping the families I care for safe.

Yes this was technically our choice, but it was The Right thing to do. I tried to strike a balance of doing right by my DC, the local community and the people I care for in work.

The slight easing of restrictions coincided with busy times at work, so no opportunity to take a holiday when it was permitted. There were also restrictions, e.g. campsites only open for people with their own washing/toilet facilities so things we might normally do at the weekend weren't possible.

My friendship group is geographically distant so it took us about 2 months to arrange a day time meet up at the end of September due to different restrictions and people's availability and that was nearly scuppered at the last minute due to rule changes. I think we only had 6 weeks where meeting up with other households was allowed.

Relatives are in Scotland and Wales so different rules complicated things there.

Social distancing was in force, so no my child did not have the opportunity to mix

I live in Wales. Household mixing in someone's house has been illegal (unless in bubbles, etc) since March. Even outdoors I think we've had more time where household mixing has been illegal than when it's been legal. That's pretty restrictive.

@Heyahun

Those people are entitled to say they’ve had a year of this *@SueEllenMishke*

Because that’s actually true!

But heaps of people had restrictions massively lifted for ages in the summer

But the OP was expressing disbelief at people who didn't have the same experience them - huge lack of self awareness. That's what people have issues with.