Not taking children out daily?

[Givemeabreak88]

Reading another thread it seems we should be taking our kids out everyday, I don’t do this, mine don’t want to go out every day, they would never want to just walk around the estate (we live in London and not a nice part!) there is a local park but they’ve been to it one million times now so no longer want to go, I haven’t taken them out for a while now (I don’t go shopping) is it bad to not take them out everyday? I can’t imagine getting dressed to just walk around a housing estate! What does everyone else do?

frazzled

Stop obsessing over how many lines a stranger has written on the internet, I beg you! As I've said, you're the parent and you'll have to deal with the consequences of not having taken your child out. But do give her some Vitamin D supplements at least.

From April to October we spend whole days, weekends, even weeks outside. Camping, day trips, barbecues in the garden, late night walks. I'm not going to loose any sleep over my kids staying in more over the winter. We do try and get out most days, even just for 20 mins, mainly because my 5 year old needs to burn off the energy, and even if my 9 year old doesn't want to go out, she usually feels better for it afterwards. But there are days when its pouring down all day and it really doesnt appeal to any of us. I don't think there's any harm in that.

This thread has turned so smug, classic mumsnet.

People wanging on about how THEY make it interesting with super fun treasure hunts etc! And crying salty tears about all the poor hermit children getting rickets. Vs people who prefer to have debates about the nature of existence at home. You couldn't make it up 😂

wardrobesandthebackofthem

You don't get vitamin d during winter in the UK from being outside so you'll need to take a supplement anyway.

@wardrobesandthebackofthem do you know what, yeah I probably have paid too much attention to your comments. But I posted on here originally because I felt the op sounded worried and like she was feeling guilty and I wanted to help by telling her she isn't alone. I really wish people on here would think about the impact of their words. Its so easy to come on here with peoples smug comments about how they 'can't believe' the way other parents are doing things or to go on fb and see post after post of people baking or crafting and feel utterly shit about yourself when in reality, that just isn't what it is like for a lot of people right now. I came to try and reassure someone and got heaped on saying my kids will struggle when things go back to normal, that I don't try and make walks fun or dress my child weather appropriately (as if anyone could possibly know that from one post saying a child didn't want to do something), there have been comments in general about how the kids will lack vitamin d, how their muscles will waste away(!!), etc when many parents right now are just trying to survive and are stressed beyond belief. Do the posters commenting on the poor kids mental health honestly think they are helping by stressing their parents out further? Even your last comment is 'dont worry about it, you will have to deal with the consequences" I mean seriously?
So yes I probably am 'obsessing' too much about a strangers comments but its only because I passionately despise mum shaming, especially from strangers who don't even get a proper snapshot of a person's life before being outraged on their 'poor kids' lives. Im fortunate to have a wonderful support system even if it is just emotionally not practically right now and I've still spent many nights in tears worrying about my kids, I can't imagine what it must be like for people who don't have that. To then have people basically telling you they are doing it so much better and you should be worried is damaging and quite frankly vile

At least some of our children go out every day (usually the boys) even if it's just to play football on the green out the front. Dd has to be forced out so I make a special effort a few times a week when I'm not at work to get her out for a walk.

@wardrobesandthebackofthem

frazzled

Stop obsessing over how many lines a stranger has written on the internet, I beg you! As I've said, you're the parent and you'll have to deal with the consequences of not having taken your child out. But do give her some Vitamin D supplements at least.

Stop trying to wind frazzled up, you are just embarrassing yourself with your patronising posts.

Frazzled just ignore it, it’s absolutely not worth getting wound up by some random on Mumsnet who has nothing better to do than attempt wind you up.

@Thesearmsofmine thank you

Can we just knock the Vit D nonsense on the head? No-one is getting Vit D from being outdoors in the UK winter.

www.nhs.uk/live-well/healthy-body/how-to-get-vitamin-d-from-sunlight/

Take a supplement!

My kids are all different. 1 tolerated a 10 day isolation stint, another can't do a morning in the house!

We go out every day, whatever the weather. I can't cope with it more than them probably. If it's dark then we use torches!

I envy those who are able to be at peace at home and aim for a bit more of that zen myself.

I agree with those who say this is an individual thing. It wouldn't work for me but I can understand how it does for others.

thesearms

No I'm not trying to wind anyone up.

Whether you're going to get oceans of vitamin D or not, natural light is really important for sleep and mood. This is basic parenting!!!

@wardrobesandthebackofthem an appreciation that everyone’s situation is different, and understanding the impact of the words that you type is part of being a basic human being. I hope you are teaching your children to be more empathetic than you are

I do sort of envy people whose kids don't bounce off the walls in the house. Mine get hyperactive if they stay in too long and we have a lovely house with space. They are very high energy and I've had to adapt my parenting to wearing them out.

I have a friend who spends most days inside her much smaller house with her 3 young kids and they are fine. They are low energy chilled out beings. Do what works for your family.

I would also say time surrounded by beautiful greenery outside is different to urban spaces. I've lived somewhere very urban and felt starved of nature despite being outside.

14ceeveebee

I'm teaching then the importance of looking after their mental and physical health by having the self discipline to get out every day, enjoy the natural light, kick a ball perhaps, plod along discussing worries and sharing jokes, and I empathize with and ignore tantrums depending on severity. So I think I'm muddling through. If they're busy, we make time and life is better afterwards. They don't get near a device for pleasure until they've been outside. We also talk frequently about how fortunate we are and discuss what life is like for other children.

No one should give up on leaving the house on a daily basis.

Oh climb out your own arse.

Personally I'm not a fan of making arbitrary rules, it's chucked out down yesterday, all day, we didn't go out, we put onesies on and played at home and watched movies/iPads.

Today we went for a muddy walk, even that was a bit of a washout tbh as it was SO slippery but yes we did feel better for it.

But really your posts strike me as the worse kind of parent, the parent who thinks they have NAILED parenting without even daring to consider that other families might have different needs, different personalities, that they live in a different kind of area, a different kind of house/flat. And then you patronise those parents, those who may be struggling in the middle of a fucking pandemic, and you make them feel more shit. I think I'd forsake a walk in the rain for a parent with a little more empathy and grace.

They walk to and from school at the moment so have outdoors play.

My eldest is in live lessons all day, but when its PE she takes herself off for a walk.

I'm working extremely long days as Covid lockdowns makes my work triple so by the time I'm done it's dark, cold and time to make dinner. By the time that is sorted its bedtime.

Weekends everyone is so knackered from the week and our usual weekend activities are closed. It's too depressing to wall round put housing estate over and over and over and over so we rarely go out then too.

As a kid my mum used to lock us all outside in the summer, as shes a hot weather outdoor lover and hated us being indoors. I just wanted to sit in the cool of the house and read, not have to beg for the patio doors to be unlocked every time I needed to pee! Due to this I never force my kids out, whether it's hot, cold, snowing or raining. They want to go out, we will take them out (just took 8 year old out to try out her new heelys) but otherwise we let them do what they want.

It's not pleasant in London right now, is it? But I think you know the answer to this. It must be really hard with 4, but they need more exercise than they can possibly get indoors unless you live in a mansion with a pool etc. It's not for fun, or even 'just' fresh air (though that's important), but they need proper cardiovascular exercise, so running around basically, for their long term health.

One thing we've been doing is hiding buttons (real ones!) or other tokens or when they're lucky smarties in places around the playground /park and then they charge around looking for them. The tokens can be exchanged for TV or whatever when we get home.

Personally I'm not a fan of making arbitrary rules

it's only you calling them arbitrary. I call them as basic as feeding the children daily, brushing your teeth and so on.

It's really not only me. Funnily enough I know plenty of other parents and not one of them insist on taking their children out EVERY day without fail like some kind of regimented task.

It's a really shit time at the moment and people need to do what's best for their family. If children are genuinely happy at home and are able to get some exercise at home that's great. Getting outside really helps my children but they're young and we are lucky that we have a couple of parks that are quiet and some countryside nearby.

We go out for walks 4 days a week (they're at school/ nursery the other 3) and we barely see anyone around so I think most are staying in most of the time.

I think exercise is important and indoor exercise ends up in carnage with my children so it's easier for me to take them out, but what's easier for me doesn't mean it's easier for everyone else.

I don’t think you have to leave every day. Sometimes a chilled out day in front of the tv is what everyone needs. I personally don’t find it fun to get outside in the pissing rain. Others are much more committed to the ideal of getting outside that it doesn’t bother them. Today we had a very lazy day but the children did lots of dancing and jumping around so they weren’t sat doing nothing.

Funnily enough I know plenty of other parents and not one of them insist on taking their children out EVERY day without fail like some kind of regimented task.

looking at the amount of parents who insist on driving to school and would faint at the idea of walking in the rain for a 2 minutes walk, we all know plenty of them

There are also countless threads about posters unhappy with their excess weight and attitude to health and fitness. Education starts early, but each to their own.

It's just sad that people are ready to make more efforts when it's a dog than their own children.

erometheturnipking

We read. We craft. We have long conversations about the nature of existence, politics, science, or whatever else strikes our fancy.

That's funny because we do those things too. Often while we're outdoors and getting the physical and mental benefits of fresh air and exercise at the same time.

Or is that meant to be the choice? Exercise outdoors or other, wholesome, intellectually superior, pursuits?
**

Just pointing out that we aren’t sitting on our asses staring at screens all day. Because many seem to think that is the only option if you enjoy the indoors.

It's just sad that people are ready to make more efforts when it's a dog than their own children.

Who are these people? I don’t have a dog because I don’t want one and wouldn’t want to take it out multiple time’s a day, I have a cat that lets herself in and out, I have zero time for a dog!