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Original poster

Is this allowed??

56 replies

JustAnotherUserinParadise · 10/01/2021 10:07

Hi all, looking for some help here as the guidelines don't seem totally clear!

We (DH and I) are due our first baby in February. The grandparents (my parents and DHs mum) are obviously very keen to meet the baby ASAP, but it looks likely we'll still be in lockdown.

Households: (1) DH and I live together, with nobody else, (2) my parents also live together, with nobody else, (3) MIL lives alone (widowed), she is currently in a support bubble with SIL but I'm assuming would be willing to change that.

I'm thinking we're allowed to meet up if mil switches her single-person bubble to bubble with us (isolating for 10 days in between), and since we will then have a child under 1 we can make another bubble with my parents as well?

Is my interpretation right? We are all pretty far apart geographically, my parents are 4 hours drive and mil just under 2. But the distance thing seems more guidelines than actual law?

Bottom line: we really want them to meet the baby, but we don't want to break the law (guidelines maybe though)!

OP posts:
SnowmanDrinkingSnowballs · 10/01/2021 10:09

I think right now that wouldn’t be on as we are being encouraged to stay close to home. Maybe by the time you have your baby things will have improved.

BridgertonBride · 10/01/2021 10:11

Appreciate they want to meet the baby but surely this is how it’s spreading!

Bubbles are for support are they not?

Mousehole10 · 10/01/2021 10:11

No sorry you can only be in one support bubble. A single person bubble and a baby under one bubble are both support bubbles, you will have to pick one and stick to it. I get it’s hard but many of us have been in the same situation for months!

Original poster
JustAnotherUserinParadise · 10/01/2021 10:12

My question isn't really whether it's sensible, just whether it's legal! And I imagine we will need support immediately after having a baby!

OP posts:
Mousehole10 · 10/01/2021 10:14

@JustAnotherUserinParadise

My question isn't really whether it's sensible, just whether it's legal! And I imagine we will need support immediately after having a baby!
It isn’t legal, no. One support bubble only, doesn’t matter if it’s a single person bubble or a baby under one bubble you’re still only allowed to be in one.
Original poster
JustAnotherUserinParadise · 10/01/2021 10:14

Sorry that was directed to the first 2 comments.

@Mousehole10 but it says that if you bubble you count as one household, so if we bubbled with mil, that is one, then that household (us and mil) can bubble with my parents?

OP posts:
Calmandmeasured1 · 10/01/2021 10:15

You can't be in a support bubble with your MIL and your parents. One support bubble is allowed.

selflove · 10/01/2021 10:15

No, the rules state "you should not form a support bubble with a household that is already part of a support bubble". So if you are a support bubble with your parents, you would be breaking the rules to also form one with your MIL.

Is this allowed??
BridgertonBride · 10/01/2021 10:15

How is showing the kid off ‘support’?

Original poster
JustAnotherUserinParadise · 10/01/2021 10:16

Oh bugger...
that's pretty clear then, thanks guys!

OP posts:
DownWhichOfLate · 10/01/2021 10:16

Get your MIL to move in with you? Shock

hayleysmiles · 10/01/2021 10:16

A childcare bubble means dropping your child off, it is not to be used for adults to socialise, this is specifically said in the guidance

FelicityPike · 10/01/2021 10:17

No, that isn’t allowed.
We all know extended family are looking forward to meeting their newest family member....but it’s just not safe.

Quartz2208 · 10/01/2021 10:17

I think that is pushing it a bit OP and you are only allowed one support bubble.

Does your MIL spend a lot of time with your SIL have you thought through the politics of making her change and I assume she lives near so would isolate for 10 days drive to see you briefly then isolate again.

Its hard and its tough but I think wait this one out

Bedraggledmumoftwo · 10/01/2021 10:17

Definitely only one or you could keep counting your newly enlarged bubble as a household and adding another one on!

PurpleFlower1983 · 10/01/2021 10:17

You’ll need to pick one. You may find you three want plenty of time just the three of you in the first weeks anyway!

Original poster
JustAnotherUserinParadise · 10/01/2021 10:17

@BridgertonBride it wouldn't just be "showing the kid off"! We want our parents around for advice, practical help, emotional support etc...

OP posts:
DenisetheMenace · 10/01/2021 10:18

Our grandson in nearly 6 months now, we can’t see him. It’s tough, really tough but we understand why the restrictions are needed. If everyone abides by them, this will be over more quickly for everyone and we can be with our loved ones again.

Mousehole10 · 10/01/2021 10:18

@JustAnotherUserinParadise

Sorry that was directed to the first 2 comments.

@Mousehole10 but it says that if you bubble you count as one household, so if we bubbled with mil, that is one, then that household (us and mil) can bubble with my parents?

No, again not allowed. It says you can have one support bubble. If you bubble with your MIL then yes you are counted as one household but that is because it’s a support bubble and the only one allowed. You cannot then form another one. We’ve all had to just pick one, Tough choices but that’s how it is. Pick the one that will be the most support to you.
MaggieFS · 10/01/2021 10:18

Ask over on this thread - no need for the full post- just ask if you're allowed to be in two support bubbles, one with a single person and one because you have a baby under 1.

New English COVID legislation published www.mumsnet.com/Talk/coronavirus/4126959-New-English-COVID-legislation-published

Personally I'd expect not. Distance isn't relevant for bubbles but the number of bubbles might be.

Original poster
JustAnotherUserinParadise · 10/01/2021 10:19

@Quartz2208 not particularly, SIL tends to go and stay there every so often for a couple of weeks (working from home). So she is fairly often alone for a week or more.

OP posts:
Perfect28 · 10/01/2021 10:19

You are allowed a support bubble and a childcare bubble, so technically this is allowed. However it's not really ideal. I'm in a similar boat. MIL will have to wait, my mum will be coming to be my birth partner however.

caffeinebuzz · 10/01/2021 10:19

You're right that distance doesn't come into the law here. But you can only be in one support bubble at a time. But that could be your parents for a period initially after the birth, then switching to your MIL with a 10 day isolation in between.

You can be in both a support and a childcare bubble as long as you don't mix at the same time. The guidelines used to say the childcare bubbles were to allow parents to work, but I've just checked gov.uk and it no longer has that restriction - maybe an hour to catch up on sleep while MIL takes the baby for a walk?

Bedraggledmumoftwo · 10/01/2021 10:20

You would be able to have a childcare bubble too but that isnt you/dh mixing with the adult involved- it would be handing over your newborn and waving goodbye so I would probably say wait a while for that. Your Dh could go for socially distanced walk with miles and take baby in pram though

Bedraggledmumoftwo · 10/01/2021 10:20

With mil not miles