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Original poster

for being annoyed at my in-laws carelessness?!

54 replies

ims0rrydarlingg · 07/01/2021 16:56

My husband has had covid like symptoms since Monday so has been at home, off from work. He did work from home on Tuesday but called in sick since yesterday as his symptoms worsened. I have no visible symptoms but we have both done a test and are waiting for results.

I last saw his family on the 31st and he last saw them on the 3rd. We have been a support bubble with them. 6 of them in one household and then my Husband and I.

His Mum mentioned symptoms to me yesterday.

Other family members in that household have symptoms but no one is getting a test done. Okay, whatever.

I’m annoyed because his family have said to him to still come over and see them as everyone has the symptoms so it’s okay.

I’m not a firm favourite of theirs anyway so they’ll probably say I’m preventing him from seeing his family and using a ‘cold’ as an excuse. Yawn.

OP posts:
emmathedilemma · 07/01/2021 17:00

ffs and they wonder why it's spreading like it is Hmm
How/why are you in a "support bubble" when there's 2 people in your household and 6 in theirs??
You should all be self-isolating until your test results come back.

Cherrysoup · 07/01/2021 17:03

@emmathedilemma is bang on. None of you should be seeing each other and support bubbles are for lone adults.

Original poster
ims0rrydarlingg · 07/01/2021 17:06

I wish I didn’t have to see them at all, but I have no choice. They come to ours because of their Son. I’m from a different culture to them and when I’ve voiced my concerns before I was painted to be a bad daughter in law. It’s complicated.

OP posts:
MissMarpleDarling · 07/01/2021 17:07

Agree with the above so voted YABU why are you in a support bubble if you are 2 adults?

NerrSnerr · 07/01/2021 17:08

Why are you in a support bubble with them? Yes it was irresponsible not to tell you but you shouldn't be seeing them.

I bet they've been mixing with others if they're not taking it seriously.

emmathedilemma · 07/01/2021 17:10

"they come to ours because of their son".....given that you're married to him then I assume he's a grown adult and there is no medical / caring need for them to be in your house. You need to grow a pair, point out what's happening in the country to them and not let them in!

NerrSnerr · 07/01/2021 17:10

@ims0rrydarlingg

I wish I didn’t have to see them at all, but I have no choice. They come to ours because of their Son. I’m from a different culture to them and when I’ve voiced my concerns before I was painted to be a bad daughter in law. It’s complicated.
So why say support bubble. Just be honest and say you've been breaking the rules to see them because of a complicated situation.
AlternativePerspective · 07/01/2021 17:14

You’re not supposed to be in a support bubble as support bubbles are for lone adults.

I’m afraid that if you already break the rules without caring then it stands to reason that someone is going to contract COVID because people already didn’t care about mixing.

Calmandmeasured1 · 07/01/2021 17:14

Are you in a support bubble with your DH's family because you have a child under the age of 1?

Let them say whatever they like and think whatever the like about you. Your DH mustn't go and see them until he receives a negative test result. I also wouldn't want my DH going into a household where people have Covid symptoms but can't be bothered to test. He'd be stupid to do so, just as they are stupid not to test.

Original poster
ims0rrydarlingg · 07/01/2021 17:16

I’ve not gone to see them. They come to ours, always unannounced to see their Son. In their culture this is the norm. I’ve mentioned it several times but they think I’m being over the top. They think they can come here whenever they want as it’s acceptable in the culture. What am I supposed to do?

OP posts:
Original poster
ims0rrydarlingg · 07/01/2021 17:17

My Husband hasn’t seen them since Sunday and refused when they called him yesterday and today.

OP posts:
Original poster
ims0rrydarlingg · 07/01/2021 17:18

I’ve not seen my own Dad since early October or my siblings or any friends.

OP posts:
Original poster
ims0rrydarlingg · 07/01/2021 17:19

They think I’m overreacting as I have no apparent symptoms and my DH has a ‘cold’.

OP posts:
BernadetteRostankowskiWolowitz · 07/01/2021 17:19

The second anyone showed symptoms they should stay home and book tests. To do anything less is irresponsible.

Averyyounggrandmaofsix · 07/01/2021 17:20

Is It any wonder this thing is spreading? It's amazing no one has reported you all.

LawnFever · 07/01/2021 17:21

This isn’t a support bubble at all, they’ve just been visiting as usual and have probably spread it further than to you & your DH if they’re not taking it seriously

Saz12 · 07/01/2021 17:21

Until they get a negative test they should be isolating, “support bubble” or family politics is irrelevant.

If DH gets positive test then he could be passing t on to them.
If his test is negative then they could be passing Covid to him.

Either way your households can’t mix just now.

8 adults socialising together in private house is a daft risk to’ve been taking when it’s avoidable. It’s likely that someone will share Covid around between you all at some point, even if you dodge it this time.

NerrSnerr · 07/01/2021 17:22

Don't let them into your house. Keep repeating the guidelines to them.

How many more households are they mixing with in 'support bubbles'?

ZeroFuchsGiven · 07/01/2021 17:22

You are part of the problem. You are breaking the rules, not a support bubble at all.

LawnFever · 07/01/2021 17:25

It’s not their carelessness, it’s all of your carelessness to have carried on - had your DH been working outside of your home before he got symptoms? He’s likely spread it there too Sad

Original poster
ims0rrydarlingg · 07/01/2021 17:26

I have said to DH they are no longer welcome until lockdown is over. The first lockdown we weren’t living together as I was with my Dad and only came back home in August. Different counties over 100miles so stayed put there.

I’m aware of allowing them into my home I am also part of them problem.

OP posts:
Dinosaurcatcher · 07/01/2021 17:26

Almost a year into this fucking mess and the amount of people that still don’t get it astounds me!
All I see on here is excuse after excuse after excuse for so called ‘support bubbles’ - it’s really not rocket science. I’m beginning to believe Covid could be a way to rid the planet of stupid selfish people.

Original poster
ims0rrydarlingg · 07/01/2021 17:27

@LawnFever No he hasn’t been working as he’s been off since before Christmas. He was due back in the office on Tuesday but worked from home.

OP posts:
omg35 · 07/01/2021 17:28

I think you're absolving yourself of all responsibility a bit here! You're an adult and the house is both of yours. You should be able to point out they're not allowed to be in a bubble with you and can't come in. If everyone makes these excuses this will never be over. Just follow the rules ffs. They don't always make sense but they're our only way out of this mess until we're vaccinated. Take some responsibility

Cleverpolly3 · 07/01/2021 17:28

@ims0rrydarlingg

I’ve not gone to see them. They come to ours, always unannounced to see their Son. In their culture this is the norm. I’ve mentioned it several times but they think I’m being over the top. They think they can come here whenever they want as it’s acceptable in the culture. What am I supposed to do?
Not let them in It’s a pandemic and your and your husband are ineligible to form a support bubble with your in laws Hmm
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