Life is a hideous nightmare

[Scaredshitlessagain]

Can't cope with anymore of it. I know there's a vaccine but it's going to be months before it starts to have an effect. My kids schooling is crap, our lives are crap. The government is useless. I'm done.

I'm trying to focus on little positives - live in the moment. A good book, a funny film, a lovely old photo of my children. Don't think ahead. If you get through tomorrow, that's great. Congratulate yourself on that. Easy to say I know!!

You'll get through it, Shitless, your children will cope and pick up their education. However I am sorry for how you feel right now and I understand how, now, it is all 'getting' to people who were previously quite philosophical about it.

Make the most of Christmas with your family bubble, have a rest and be renewed for whatever next week brings.

we can do it
we can keep on keeping on

To be honest I think people feel like this when they realise their lives are a bit meh. People really depend so much on pointless shit.
Any real skills? Could you survive with no shops if you needed to?

The whole point of Christmas is celebrating the sun coming back. It’s fundamental to life. Not so much that there’s no cinema or pub for a few weeks.

Do life - get fit and strong, grow stuff, help the vulnerable wildlife in your area ( song birds not foxes), help people without being paid.

I don’t like wasting time away. So I’m trying to find ways to make days enjoyable.

I want to try open water swimming. I am lifting weights at home (little free weights), trying something new recipes, studying (as well as working and looking after DCs!) I’m in Scotland so back in lockdown shortly. We are going to have hot chocolate in the woods and some night walks with torches.

The only way is to try to find joy in now.

Please don’t worry about formal schooling. I don’t know how old your children are but try and take this time to teach them things that will really be useful to them. For example Depending on age do meal planning/ talk about how much things cost/ which country they come from-look on a map or globe / let them help with the preparation / cooking of the food. Etc. Have a routine of exercise eg going for walks or bike rides. Talk about the types of trees you see. If something is broken at home then have a go at fixing it with the children’s help. Make things together- teach them how to knit or sew a button on. Play board games. These are all ( in my opinion )important life skills that are often missed out in our busy lives.
Not meant to be patronising in any way. Just to say I’m sure most people are struggling with formal teaching of children but it’s just as if not more effective if done through daily life skills.

It’s really hitting me now. In March I felt ok but was shielding. That was okay but began to feel endless. I feel we got hardly any respite before the virus started to make its presence felt again. I thought I’d start Christmas ‘properly’ this afternoon- made some mulled wine which I shared with DH, had a couple of mince pies. All it did was make me tired. It was only about one glass of wine. If only I was a lightweight in the literal sense.

This isn't even the worst year of my life. Of course it's shit, but people can and do get through a lot worse. This won't last forever.

@Kjc39

It won’t be over soon. Just heard on the bbc news that herd immunity won’t be achieved until August and will take until April to vaccinate all elderly and vulnerable. I feel like crying.

They say that humans have two basic demands, one for certainty and the other for control and we can have neither. And actually uncertainty is our friend in situations like this; nothing is certain and we can’t really predict what happens next; if we’ve learned anything we’ve learned that from the last few months. And what if we could predict accurately every occurrence - would it help us? There’s no point in trying to predict what happens and over what course of time. The only way to get through this is to take it one day at a time. I’ve had to make myself think like this because on the one hand I want to fast forward to the summer but on the other hand if I do that I’ll miss a chunk of time with my dying father and I also can’t afford to spend the whole time livid with this virus that’s already taken so much away and killed my BiL. So I have stopped trying to predict the outcome, stopped trying to see what a catastrophic horizon might look like, and stopped trying to paint a rosy picture too. Stopped looking for certainty and stopped trying to control the uncontrollable. I wake up in the morning and deal with the day in hand, try and do some nice things among the drudge and try and think what will be will be.

I also think you can’t judge anyone who makes light of the situation or someone who moans about something apparently trivial, you never know what else they’re coping with outside your field of vision.

@Scaredshitlessagain one foot in front of the other, it will be OK

I haven’t noticed much difference in the winter to my usual winter life. I tend to hibernate a bit anyway so not been a big deal for me. I get that not everyone feels the same.

Things don't happen fast and speedily with a deadly virus, you have to bide your time, and being a virus, nobody can say when all things can be safe again.

I feel you 😫

@DishingOutDone, I think this is the tip of the iceberg. Mental health has been affected badly by the pandemic and not everyone will express their unhappiness either. For me I feel worse about Brexit because it’s man made, I think - but it now feels like it’s all gone to pot. I’m worried about Covid. I accept the need for restrictions and am very obedient- - I’ve also got lots to occupy me at home and I’m not a great one for socialising anyway. But this last week feels like too much now.

I certainly don’t like the funeral plan ads that are popping up now at the side.

Stopping watching and listening to news helped me, you can't miss the headlines, but that's all they are. Any change to rules and everyone is talking about it.
learn how to take in the info you need and ignore the rest.
it is possible but you have to practice, tell friends and family not to discuss it in detail with you, for a while.
That and therapy helps me.

Personally I have one child doing exams who I am really concerned about other 2 kids in primary school no concern whatsoever! I would love it if they sent senior schools back after the holidays so the kids have half a chance of passing their not exams!

The ambulance chasers and specialist lawyers must be rubbing their hands in glee waiting for the dust to clear. There are going to be so many claims for compo they will be able to dine out on the proceeds for years.

If this government has achieved anything it is an object lesson in how to turn an entire nation into a bunch of paranoid sheep.

@DishingOutDone

I didn't know people felt like this, truly? I know its pretty crap with a pandemic, Brexit etc - but surely unless you are on the breadline, or sick, or have lost relatives, then life isn't a nightmare for you personally?

Have I missed something?

Are you for real? You know 700,000 in the UK alone have been pushed into poverty by covid? www.google.com/amp/s/amp.theguardian.com/society/2020/nov/30/almost-700000-driven-poverty-covid-crisis-uk-study And many more may not be in poverty (yet) but are undergoing huge financial hardship. On top of this, people have lost loved ones, suffered from the illness itself, suffered from being unable to access medical treatment, from extreme loneliness or from mental health issues caused or exacerbated by all of the above. I believe that this issues are caused by covid more than lockdowns, but also think that the many many tone-deaf and privileged MN posters who can work from home or are in public sector jobs need to seriously work on their empathy. This has indeed been a fucking nightmare for MANY people, and if you don't know any of them then that is likely a reflection of your privilege.

@HmmSureJan whats this professor guys name please?

I just got my positive diagnosis - me, DH and 3 other kids all got it from my youngest at primary school. Feeling crap and scared.

Wait until they come out of the closet and admit the vaccine is null and void against the mutations. Notice their wording is not quite a definitive No it won’t affect the vaccine.

I honestly don’t see how things are going to improve over the next few years. It’s infuriating when you see how blasé and ignorant some people are. I hope it becomes a criminal offence to be without a mask in public unless you have an ID card or QR code that proves you are actually exempt and not a chancer.

I welcome another full lockdown as long as it’s in the spring again. 🙏🏻

I'm inclined to mention arguing with pigeons, but I shan't as I am genuinely interested. I hadn't realised people felt like this unless they had lost relatives or lost their jobs, we're in abusive relationships that they cant escape due to lockdown - that level of being directly affected (as I said originally!)

My youngest DD is in year 13, has severe mental health issues we are struggling to get appointments and treatment for her and cannot do online learning so she has been directly affected, DD2 is in uni she will have lost out on socialising, teaching has been sporadic. My operation has been cancelled and I don't know when I will get it. I'd planned to split with H but its just not feasible. I'm in my late 50s. I work with families who are using food banks but then they were like that before the pandemic. I could go on, but I just think I am lucky to be alive and have my kids etc - its stressful sometimes but I'd never think to post something like this.

That's why I am genuinely puzzled by the "hideous nightmare" outlook but I shall read on with interest. Normally when anyone moans on MN that they are a bit fed up it turns into the four Yorkshiremen sketch but clearly the OP is not alone in this feeling by a long stretch.

The advantage we have is medical advancements and vaccines.

I wonder whether our so called advancements and meddling will drag the whole thing out longer and potentially make it a lot worse.

There's already a suggestion that lock downs have led to the new strain - my understanding is that the old one couldn't survive with us all locked up and so it adapted to become more successful at infecting everyone.

I've probably got this all wrong - but it's not left me a huge amount of hope.

This might sound trite and insensitive. But did anyone feel really pissed off with life a year ago? In summer 2019 I hated my job and generally, things weren't great. We really had no f**king idea, did we? 😂
This week:

• I'm queuing outside supermarkets wearing a mask in the rain hoping there wouldn't be food shortages
• banned from flying to other countries because of a mutant virus
• it's illegal for someone to visit me at my home.
• I'm not allowed to leave the London area
• All restaurants, clothes shops, theatres, gyms and cinemas are closed for the foreseeable future.
• Getting on a bus with people is unsafe.

You literally couldn't make this stuff up.