Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Covid

Mumsnet doesn't verify the qualifications of users. If you have medical concerns, please consult a healthcare professional.

Original poster

Are your teens complying?

37 replies

Nishky · 17/12/2020 07:34

I had a very upset 19 year old last night who is feeling lonely and had a Snapchat full of people breaking the rules - a number of house parties and a b/f and g/f spending nights at others houses.

My two teenagers are complying but finding it really tough when that is in their faces

OP posts:
starfish4 · 17/12/2020 07:57

My 19 year old has been totally complying. She's been out walking with one friend, sometimes they've got a takeaway. I keep telling her she can walk with others. She is busy though, came home from uni early so has work there, also managed to get 30+ hours work pw where she worked in the summer. Really important for them to get out, either for walks, cycling, drinks, potter around shops with someone if they need things, even at 19 messing around in park with a ball.

ImperfectTents · 17/12/2020 07:59

Mostly, I suspect they occasionally sit in a shed or garage together but given that they are sitting in class together all day I can't get too excited about it

CovidPostingName · 17/12/2020 08:00

My younger teen (15yo) is complying even though many of his wider school group are not. As he says, "they're not the brightest bunch anyway mum!"

Original poster
Nishky · 17/12/2020 08:05

Thanks all for replying - she has uni work too, but hasn’t managed to get a job as she did waitressing before uni- she has met a couple of people for walks- I think the photos of parties just got to her last night

We are going to do a lot of horse riding over Christmas as that is about all we can do.

@CovidPostingName love your son’s attitude!

OP posts:
RedskyAtnight · 17/12/2020 08:07

Yes, to the extent that they are only meeting outside in groups of up to 6. The most "dodgy" thing they've done is gone in a supermarket or a takeaway as a group. Oh, and I suspect their social distancing is a bit suspect.

Their peer groups seem to be fairly evenly split between those who are sticking to the rules pretty much and those who are by and large ignoring them. But I suspect this just mirrors the general population.

DailyPotion · 17/12/2020 08:09

Yes, my 17yo has only left the house for college since March and that's only one day a fortnight with work and alternate weeks of college at home. That's not because he's "good" though it's because he's very introverted, so this is his comfort zone and I'm very worried about the harm it's doing.

19yo has just completed his second isolation in a month, so a whole month without pay and he's followed all the guidelines to the letter and without complaint.

When he's not isolating he's worked and been to open things within the rules but not even tried to bend the rules. His friends have been the same. I've been very pleasantly surprised.

iVampire · 17/12/2020 08:10

AFAIK yes, sticking with it.

Only meeting people outside (lots of mooching round parks, all online instead when it’s raining)

And yes, I believe her. Because I’m CEV and all her friends know I’m living with cancer. And they’re a nice bunch, and are finding a safer social life

nancy75 · 17/12/2020 08:16

Yes, 15 yr old & all her friends are taking it very seriously. Had met up with friends to go to park or local shop up until October half term, since then has not been out apart from school or with me.
My Facebook lacks pages are full of people blaming kids for all of this but from where I’m standing all the kids I know are really following the rules. They are anxious about their education & about making their family ill.
Poor kids

DumplingsAndStew · 17/12/2020 08:16

My 15 year old is, but doesn't hang out with friends anyway so much easier for us all.
12 year old is still seeing the occasional friend at times, as under 12s allowed to meet friends and most of her friends are under 12 or just recent birthdays. Its been essential for her mental health.

Bonkerz · 17/12/2020 08:28

Have a 20 year old autistic son who is struggling. He had a friend over Saturday because it was the lesser of the 2 evils (mental health being other one)

Dd is 15 on Saturday. She is having friend over who she walks to school with and sits next to in class. Again it's a mental health thing and has been risk assessed.

QueenieButcher · 17/12/2020 08:48

15yo yes, but struggling with 19yo who is just home from long and difficult first term at uni and desperate to see her boyfriend who she's been apart from for 3 months. She has a long history of anxiety and he is v supportive so I don't want to be draconian about it but I feel very conflicted.
We (the family) have observed all the rules to the letter since March but it sounds like there has been NO social distancing in halls of residence so I guess she has had no choice but to stop worrying about Covid at Uni or she would never have left her room.
Anyone else in a similar situation? I feel so sad for them; they've been so good about not travelling in and out of high tiers all through the autumn with the promise of a sweet reunion at Christmas - and now this has been put in their way. She's very weepy and low about it.
Anyone experiencing something similar?

Tinselandbaubauls · 17/12/2020 13:56

Mine are younger teens so yes they’re doing as they’re told. Most of their friends aren’t though. Older daughter is nearly 30 and out and about all the time, she doesn’t live with us.

CarryOnFestiveNamechanging · 17/12/2020 15:12

Yes. Mine would make excellent Covid Marshalls. They have zero tolerance of any flouting of the rules. I have to rein them in a bit from saying things out loud when we walk past people who aren’t following the rules.

Wilkolampshade · 17/12/2020 15:58

@QueenieButcher I have two, v similar situation with one..In her case she's gone to see bf...

QueenieButcher · 17/12/2020 16:05

[quote Wilkolampshade]@QueenieButcher I have two, v similar situation with one..In her case she's gone to see bf...[/quote]
@wilkolampshade Good to hear I'm not alone! I feel so guilty about it, not to mention worried about us getting ill - but torn for her mental well-being too.

Chimeraforce · 17/12/2020 16:07

No.

nancy75 · 17/12/2020 16:09

@CarryOnFestiveNamechanging

Yes. Mine would make excellent Covid Marshalls. They have zero tolerance of any flouting of the rules. I have to rein them in a bit from saying things out loud when we walk past people who aren’t following the rules.
My Dd is the same, her particular issue is people with masks under their nose/ under their chin. She’d make a great COVID Marshall!
HotSince63 · 17/12/2020 16:11

My DS is only seeing friends at college, how great they are at social distancing and wearing their masks - I couldn't tell you but neither he nor any of this friends have had covid (i.e. no symptoms so not been tested).

Other than that he hasn't left the house at all really since March.

PrincessNutNuts · 17/12/2020 16:25

Mine have stuck to the rules. They have a good understanding of the situation and are hugely disappointed in their elders who don't seem to realise they're making it worse for all of us. Or who don't care.

My youngest talked to an anti-lockdown protester in the shops. His placard said "No To This Imprisonment" or some such.

My youngest tried to get him to understand that while his feelings were real. (He felt restricted by the rules) In reality he wasn't actually imprisoned - as evidenced by the fact that he was in a shopping centre exercising his free speech rights, eating a burger, and taking it in turns with his compatriots to down pints outside the pub they had set up opposite. It didn't go well.

lazylinguist · 17/12/2020 16:29

Yes. 15yo is perfectly happy to stay at home and keep in touch with her friends online. Not that she wasn't seeing them every day anyway until school closed. Her friends are all complying too. I don't really know anyone who isn't complying tbh.

kittensarecute · 17/12/2020 16:36

I'm not a mum but I know a few teenagers who are complying. My best friend is 19 and he is taking it very seriously because he has severe asthma so has to be very careful not to get Covid.

TeacherVoucher · 17/12/2020 16:40

How many people are going to pipe up with "no, mine are total rat bags"?

The most hilarious one I've heard was a friend who told us her son picked up Covid from a girl who popped into their university halls flat. Definitely not the all night raves and parties he wangs on about to my son then?? Hmm

EenyMeenyMinyNo · 17/12/2020 16:41

My 13 yr old finished school at lunchtime, came home and said a load of kids were going to the park but she just wanted to come home so she didn't take any more chances than she had to and spoil everyones Christmas. I am so in awe of her maturity, but so sad they are having to worry about it. She's a good 'un, I'm very lucky.

Kitcat122 · 17/12/2020 19:24

My teens are complying by only because I enforce it. The older one 16 doesn't understand how he can be at school all day with his friends but can't go around a friends house. Lots of stroppy teens in this house 😕

Original poster
Nishky · 17/12/2020 19:59

@Kitcat122 I have the exact same argument from my youngest - there is some logic in the argument but rules are rules. Pretty pissed off with the parents who are saying that their kids can have mates round

OP posts: