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Original poster

After this weekend, should I still see my gran?

43 replies

Ronasarrus · 12/12/2020 19:02

I’m in a support bubble with my 80 year old grandma and have been since it was allowed.

I had my first baby this year so I’ve been super careful. No supermarkets, outdoor activities only and my husband works from home.

This weekend I’ve done a few things I haven’t done before and now I’m starting to worry I shouldn’t see my grandma.

Friday I went to the hairdressers. Masks work. Very quick appointment. In and out in 35 minutes.

This morning I went to Boots. I needed to get a few things and went at 9am when it opened. There were around 7/8 people in there. Masks worn.

Today i went on a Santa train with my son and husband.
It was at on a Light railway.
Small train, the wooden carriage type.
Lots of the big windows open. Masks worn.
In our carriage there were 4 other adults and for children.
2 of the adults and 1 of the children was my brothers husband, his wife and their son(we all still distanced)

We got off the train and it was an outdoor grotto, back on the train and straight home.

I go to my grandmas most days and she comes to mine.

I’m so worried I’ve been too risky this weekend and I’d never forgive myself if I passed anything to her.

OP posts:
Thisyearcandoone · 12/12/2020 19:07

Having a 90 year old Nan (who is being vaccinated Tuesday), I would be stepping away.

I know it's hard, but it's for the best.

Literally cannot wait for her to have her 2nd jab so I can spend more time with her.

Original poster
Ronasarrus · 12/12/2020 19:09

@Thisyearcandoone

Having a 90 year old Nan (who is being vaccinated Tuesday), I would be stepping away.

I know it's hard, but it's for the best.

Literally cannot wait for her to have her 2nd jab so I can spend more time with her.

@Thisyearcandoone

Is she in your support bubble?

My gran is in my bubble.

OP posts:
VerlynWebbe · 12/12/2020 19:11

She’s in your bubble, but you’ve burst the bubble...it’s no longer a bubble, unless I’m missing something?

Thisyearcandoone · 12/12/2020 19:11

No.
She's in my Mum's bubble.
I work in a school and both DC are at secondary so didn't really want them near her.
We don't see any family at the moment.

Original poster
Ronasarrus · 12/12/2020 19:15

@VerlynWebbe

She’s in your bubble, but you’ve burst the bubble...it’s no longer a bubble, unless I’m missing something?
@VerlynWebbe

What do you mean I’ve burst the bubble?!

OP posts:
VerlynWebbe · 12/12/2020 19:22

Sorry, I read too fast - I thought you’d been to the supermarket but you haven’t

Original poster
Ronasarrus · 12/12/2020 19:23

@VerlynWebbe

Sorry, I read too fast - I thought you’d been to the supermarket but you haven’t
@VerlynWebbe

I went to Boots.

Are people in support bubbles not allowed to use supermarkets?

OP posts:
EasterIssland · 12/12/2020 19:26

You’ve taken measurements not to get infected so should be fine. However , if you’re worried about your nan then don’t see her for a week -10 days.

And no. Just because you’ve done this you’ve not broken your bubble

EmmaGellerGreen · 12/12/2020 19:28

Other than the train ride, my 80 year old mum has been out and about more than you today! Carry on being careful around her.

ninja · 12/12/2020 19:30

I would give her the choice - explain what you've done and ask if she's happy to see you

LtJudyHopps · 12/12/2020 19:30

Of course you’re allowed to go places ffs. A support bubble is the same as a household so the members can go anywhere that is allowed in the current Tier. It’s completely up to you but that all sounds fairly low risk to me. Maybe give it a few days to ease your anxiety?

Original poster
Ronasarrus · 12/12/2020 19:30

@EmmaGellerGreen

Other than the train ride, my 80 year old mum has been out and about more than you today! Carry on being careful around her.
@EmmaGellerGreen

Has she? Bless her 😁

I’ve been a bit of a scaredy-cat.

OP posts:
OliveTree75 · 12/12/2020 19:32

@VerlynWebbe

Sorry, I read too fast - I thought you’d been to the supermarket but you haven’t
Why would going to a supermarket mean she's burst her bubble?

OP the things you have done are perfectly reasonable. My 82 year old grandma has been to the hairdressers herself this week. If you are worried and she can manage, stay away for a while if it makes you less worried,or distance more around her.

AcornAutumn · 12/12/2020 19:34

Being in a bubble doesn’t t bar you from legally permitted activities.

IndoorLiving · 12/12/2020 19:39

I think you’ve been more careful than the majority of people in support bubbles with elderly relatives OP. In my experience people think that somehow being in a support bubble means that the virus can’t transmit between them. For example my friend is a teacher and in a support bubble with her 90 year mum. They see each other every week inside - no masks, no social distancing. But she says it’s okay because they’re in a support bubble.....

Your risk is low but if I were you I’d be a bit careful for a little while.

VerlynWebbe · 12/12/2020 19:40

(I would not go to a supermarket, where there’s more transmission of covid than other places, then spend time with my grandmother but if that’s permitted, then it’s permitted and all I can do is shrug.)

OliveTree75 · 12/12/2020 19:42

@VerlynWebbe

(I would not go to a supermarket, where there’s more transmission of covid than other places, then spend time with my grandmother but if that’s permitted, then it’s permitted and all I can do is shrug.)
You're right. They should all starve instead.
Needcoffeecoffeecoffee · 12/12/2020 19:49

@VerlynWebbe

She’s in your bubble, but you’ve burst the bubble...it’s no longer a bubble, unless I’m missing something?
Yes completely missing what a bubble is! A bubble means you form a "virtual household" between 2 household. One with a single adult. You act as one household so dont need to distance but if one of you needs to self isolate as you have symptoms/test positive both households/the whole bubble needs to isolate. Bubbles arent restricted in what they do or where they go (no more than anyone is) it allows a single adult to have support It is not a bubble at school where they try to avoid different groups/classes mixing to avoid spread. That can "burst" (although I hate that term) when one person in the bubble tests positive and everyone is therefore a contact and needs to self isolate
Needcoffeecoffeecoffee · 12/12/2020 19:51

@Ronasarrus you haven't done anything wrong. Sounds like you have followed all the rules.
It probably just feels higher risk after not having done anything for ages

Original poster
Ronasarrus · 12/12/2020 20:26

[quote Needcoffeecoffeecoffee]@Ronasarrus you haven't done anything wrong. Sounds like you have followed all the rules.
It probably just feels higher risk after not having done anything for ages[/quote]
@Needcoffeecoffeecoffee

I agree with this. I felt so edgy when I went out but I was so surprised how relaxed other people seemed.

OP posts:
MistletoeandGin · 12/12/2020 20:34

My grandmother turned 90 yesterday. She spent her morning walking round her local shops, had takeaway coffee with family in the park then went out for lunch with my aunt (her support bubble). She gets out and about every day as she loses too much mobility if she doesn’t (and at that age if you lose it you don’t get it back).
Speak to your grandmother and ask her if she’s happy with the risk, which is low in my opinion.

Spongebobsquarefringe · 12/12/2020 20:39

If it’s any consolation I live with my Nan who is 89 CEV, I work in primary, have DC one primary one secondary, I go to supermarkets, shops of I need to, she goes to shops, hair dressers and uses the bus, we’ve all been ok. My DP works in hospitality as well. We are all careful, masks, hand gel, hand washing, surface cleansing, showers, ventilation indoors.

MistletoeandGin · 12/12/2020 20:40

My 90 year old grandma also has someone round to cut and colour her hair every 4 weeks.

Larsingsong · 12/12/2020 20:50

I try and think this way. Regardless of the laws, guidelines and bubbles, the end result with regards to your Grandma is, do you think you are at higher risk at giving her Coronavirus at the moment?

If so, see her from outside and make common sense decisions regarding how likely you could pass it onto her

It's so hard, I know. My grandma is 90 and I've only really been in her house over summer when the risk was low. Otherwise I stay outside.

Even if I was in a bubble with her (which I'm not), my kids attend school, I go out to work with other people and attend supermarkets regularly. So automatically that makes us a higher risk to her and no bubble is safe in that scenario.

PurBal · 12/12/2020 20:52

I wouldn't. My grandma died in the first lockdown, it's really not worth the risk.

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