Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Covid

Mumsnet doesn't verify the qualifications of users. If you have medical concerns, please consult a healthcare professional.

Visiting Shielding and clinically vulnerable people at Christmas

78 replies

WwMILd · 25/11/2020 17:25

Have seen a few posts about having Christmas Day with people that are most at risk, might be their last Christmas etc.

Can I just say that whilst I totally understand the sentiment behind it - if they are in those groups (esp shielding), they will be more than likely undergoing regular treatment/appointments alongside similar people. That means that whilst they might be happy to take the risk, it might also have a knock on effect on others having treatment alongside them.

Just a thought....

OP posts:
ThatFuckwitWithHisJollyCareful · 25/11/2020 17:27

Are you in the clinically extremely vulnerable/shielding category?

WwMILd · 25/11/2020 17:31

DH is.

OP posts:
ThatFuckwitWithHisJollyCareful · 25/11/2020 17:54

So you have an understanding of how fucking shit this year has been for those of us who have been shielding? Begrudging us this and and implying, in fact, saying, it will be our fault if we pass anything on to someone else, is very unreasonable in my view.

Personally I have made the decision I won't be meeting people anyway (for a variety of reasons) but I am entitled to spend time with others if I chose to, just like everyone else has been given this option. If you don't agree with people mixing in general, you can make your views clear eg emailing MP etc. But singling out CEV people and pointing fingers specifically at them, and implying a degree of guilt for exercising the same rights as the rest of the population is unpleasant.

For some of us, yes I agree, we will have lots of appointments/treatment etc and this is precisely why we need something to look forward to and a chance to meet with loved ones, especially those who haven't seen loved ones for months and months, who have been isolated and lonely.

Are you going to suggest the staff members involved in treatments etc, shouldn't be socialising due to the risk of passing it on? I doubt you would as you would probably see the unfairness of this?

Not everyone is in the same situation of course, I know a couple of people who are actually still choosing to work full time etc. (Or who can't afford to follow government "guidelines" and live on SSP of £96 a week). They are just as much a transmission risk as anyone in their workplace, so why are they being singled out and judged in this situation?

I find your post a bit passive aggressive "just a thought..." and patronising in the "understanding the sentiment".

It's been a fucking awful year. Posts like yours don't help.

premiumhob · 25/11/2020 17:56

Nobody is actually shielding though. This is a really important fact that half of Mumsnet seems to be missing.

IHaveBrilloHair · 25/11/2020 17:57

I'm in that category and I'll make my own decisions.
My body might be a bit shit, but my brain works.
This thread is horrible.

AldiAisleofCrap · 25/11/2020 17:58

Nobody is actually shielding though. This is a really important fact that half of Mumsnet seems to be missing.
Er yes I am , an important point you seem to have missed is shielding was restarted on November 5th.
@premiumhob

premiumhob · 25/11/2020 18:00

Er yes I am , an important point you seem to have missed is shielding was restarted on November 5th.

Oh. Sorry. My mistake. Completely.

iVampire · 25/11/2020 18:01

Shielding has returned in a ‘lite’ form - I got the letter at the start of lockdown

I think you need to discuss with the CEV person in your circle - we’re not a homogenous lump. For example, none of my appointments have been alongside other CEV patients and I don’t think you can tell everyone who might go for a blood test at a regular clinic that Xmas contact is too risky

And good point by pp about staff - they see far more vulnerable people than an individual patient would

PurpleDandelions · 25/11/2020 18:02

Many of us have been shielding for longer than that on our specialists' advice.

IHaveBrilloHair · 25/11/2020 18:03

Lots of us shield without a letter as we know its sensible.
It exists, whether its official or not.

WildWindBlows · 25/11/2020 18:04

Are you going to suggest the staff members involved in treatments etc, shouldn't be socialising due to the risk of passing it on

This^ my shielding parent has about 2 hospital visits a year plus gets her bloods done by the practice nurse every 3 months or so with no one else around.
Some of my nurse acquaintances on FB otoh were having regular parties and holidays throughout lockdown before going straight back on the wards. If a vulnerable person contacts coronavirus whilst at hospital I think it's safe to say it will most likely be from the staff.

ThatFuckwitWithHisJollyCareful · 25/11/2020 18:05

I'm glad it's not just me who feels like that Brillo.

Thinking about this a bit more, I thought that it's a slippery slope to go down, holding the CEV group to a different standard of behaviour (especially using guilt to do this!)

For example, I have to use public transport to get to my appointments. This in theory makes me a (slightly, and also bear in mind the use of PPE and distancing etc) higher risk to fellow patients who drive themselves and don't mix with others on buses etc. But I have just as much right to be there and receive treatment.

SunShinesStill · 25/11/2020 18:05

@premiumhob

Nobody is actually shielding though. This is a really important fact that half of Mumsnet seems to be missing.
Fuck you. Some of us have had our doctors tell us to not stop shielding. We have given up jobs and lives and not been shopping/to cafes etc since March. Even now we are not seeing people, not going out for food or anything. When shielding stoped in the summer some people still had to keep going. No eat out to help out, no seeing friends and no holidays.

But hey, you’re right.

Sirzy · 25/11/2020 18:05

@premiumhob

Nobody is actually shielding though. This is a really important fact that half of Mumsnet seems to be missing.
We are. Ds has been home schooling virtually throughout this lockdown.

We have already made the decision that we won’t be seeing anyone else over Christmas. Personally I think the rules are daft but if people feel safe to see others then that’s their risk to assess not for someone else (unless medically trained and knows that person of course! to tell them not too.

SunShinesStill · 25/11/2020 18:07

Apologies for the aggression. It’s been a bloody long year and people just don’t give a shit about each other any more

ThatFuckwitWithHisJollyCareful · 25/11/2020 18:08

Ah, we are all thinking it @SunShinesStill Smile

QueenPaws · 25/11/2020 18:08

I ended up crying to my boss down the phone this week. Shielding since March, I go out for a drive and to get a Starbucks from the drive through so my car doesn't die, and sit and people watch for a bit
First it was well the vulnerable need to shield, now it seems to be well the vulnerable need to be vaccinated
I think be gentle with talk of shielding because if anyone CEV is like me, they're very very close to snapping

herecomesthsun · 25/11/2020 18:14

@premiumhob

Nobody is actually shielding though. This is a really important fact that half of Mumsnet seems to be missing.
Yes I am as well. Letter went out on Nov 4th.
IHaveBrilloHair · 25/11/2020 18:16

I'm the same with the odd drive, not getting out of the car.
I have a chronic degenerative lung condition, I have to be careful, but I also have awful anxiety, depression and severe osteoporosis so even getting my delivered shopping in is difficult and then someone wants to tell me I mustn't do things I'm not bloody doing, and then there's no shielding.

Fuck the fuck off.

AlwaysLatte · 25/11/2020 18:18

My clinically vulnerable Dad has not been anywhere near another patient recently in all the appointments I've taken him to. They are being kept really separate.

AlwaysLatte · 25/11/2020 18:19

Nobody is actually shielding though. This is a really important fact that half of Mumsnet seems to be missing
Some are. A smaller group - my dad is.

SunShinesStill · 25/11/2020 18:20

@ThatFuckwitWithHisJollyCareful thanks. Thought swearing is fine, but swearing and aggression would get me in trouble!

Only just going to brave the drive through coffee with a change of cups next month.

FourTeaFallOut · 25/11/2020 18:27

Wait....so, first I have to shield - not going outside at all for months on end - to save the hospital beds for healthy folk, then I have to shield but send all my kids to school or risk a fine, then although I'm in 2.5 million people shielding - I won't get a look in at the vaccine till group six, and now you'd like me to forgo having a Christmas like everyone else because if I do get sick I might make someone treating me sick?

Fuck all that for a game of soldiers.

AldiAisleofCrap · 25/11/2020 18:29

And to clarify it’s only been officially again in England in this lockdown but on consultants advice I haven’t stopped shielding.

premiumhob · 25/11/2020 18:30

@SunShinesStill

Fuck you.

I apologised for getting it wrong. But yeah.