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Original poster

To ask if your children wear masks

240 replies

FatimaMunchy · 22/10/2020 19:06

Been to the hospital today and saw a number of children, some probably 5 or 6, wearing masks. I asked a nurse if children had to wear masks as it was a hospital, and she said not that she was aware of.

OP posts:
SoVeryLost · 23/10/2020 06:36

@flaviaritt

SoVeryLost

You have misunderstood me horribly. Of course there are times when we have to make our children go through very unpleasant processes because the alternative is worse. This isn’t one of them. COVID isn’t a risk to very small children. By forcing them to wear masks we are protecting adults, not them. And the reality is a 3 year old won’t wear a mask correctly, will make it wet, will touch it constantly, and is at knee height to adults, so the chances of them passing on a virus in the supermarket by walking past someone is disproportionate to making them cover their face and mouth.

Please don’t imply I am someone who speaks without thought. I’m not.

Yes you are protecting children. By protecting adults who are parents to young children. It’s far more preferable for a young child to wear a mask sometimes to them loosing their mother. Like I said though parenting is hard enough without your vitriolic response. It’s not abuse.

You are now fixating on the three year old when your first post called ‘making’ children wear a mask child abuse. I have a friend whose three year old asks to wear a mask, she sees her family all wearing masks and it is normal to her.

flaviaritt · 23/10/2020 06:38

SoVeryLost

As I say, I am not having a long debate with anyone. This is my opinion. I am not “fixated”. You’ll just have to live with my disagreement.

SoVeryLost · 23/10/2020 06:42

@flaviaritt

SoVeryLost

As I say, I am not having a long debate with anyone. This is my opinion. I am not “fixated”. You’ll just have to live with my disagreement.

I don’t give a shiny shit about your disagreement. I care that your wording is nasty and attacking someone who is merely trying to do her best in very tough times. The PP was not abusing her child.

You don’t agree with a child wearing a mask fine but learn how to word your opinion without attacking a parents choice.

flaviaritt · 23/10/2020 06:43

I don’t give a shiny shit about your disagreement. I care that your wording is nasty and attacking someone who is merely trying to do her best in very tough times. The PP was not abusing her child.

And I care a similar amount about your opinion. I am not ‘attacking’ anyone. I have an opinion, have a right to that opinion and will not be changing it because of your outrage. Good day to you.

megletthesecond · 23/10/2020 06:45

Mine are over 11 so yes they do wear them. But they'd be wearing them under 11 too.

I have noticed it's mainly the Asian families who get their young kids to wear masks in our town. I don't see them keeling over.

"Child abuse" Hmm

SoVeryLost · 23/10/2020 06:46

You are a lovely person indeed, I never once said you needed to change your opinion.

Let me hazard a guess that you’ll say you aren’t politically correct, code for I’m a nasty individual who will say what I like but cry abuse if you say anything to me.

Bellesavage · 23/10/2020 06:46

No, my 5yo has asked to wear one and I've told her I don't really want her to. She tried it once and touched it constantly, dropped it on the floor etc so literally pointless. If she'd had covid it would have basically been a covid-soaked piece of cloth that infected everything else anyway.

flaviaritt · 23/10/2020 06:47

megletthesecond

PHE are very clear that small children shouldn’t be wearing masks. They are a risk to the child.

And yes, I believe they are child abuse. The fact that that is an emotive term doesn’t change what I think about the act of covering a 2 year old’s mouth and nose with a cloth for any length of time.

flaviaritt · 23/10/2020 06:48

SoVeryLost

‘Cry abuse if you say anything to me’? I wished you a good day. I didn’t ‘cry abuse’ at your rude posts.

flaviaritt · 23/10/2020 06:50

I never once said you needed to change your opinion.

And no, you don’t want me to change it. Just word it in the way you prefer. The way that doesn’t express what I think about the issue. The way that expresses what you think instead. Just that.

Well, no.

chinateapot · 23/10/2020 07:03

@flaviaritt if you really think this is child abuse you should be reporting it every time you see it and screaming it from the roof tops - no child should be abused and we all have a responsibility to do everything we can to prevent that for any child. Child abuse is not something where you can just have an opinion and agree to differ.

Now I agree that the risk from a three year old not wearing a mask in most settings is not huge (honestly I’d still rather they wore one in an oncology clinic waiting room if it’s possible without distressing them). But a whole population of under 11s wearing compared to not wearing them probably does make a difference to covid spread (and other infectious diseases). These are population level measures, not individual level.

Anyway - I don’t need to have a lengthy disagreement with you because I just...disagree. But if you really think we’re all abusing our children and that this is now widespread in society what are you doing about it?

@SoVeryLost with you on the blood tests. Mine is 7now and it’s still a battle every time of holding her while she screams that we’re hurting her. I hate it and it does feel far closer to abusive. No other choices though.

flaviaritt · 23/10/2020 07:14

If you really think this is child abuse you should be reporting it every time you see it and screaming it from the roof tops

Probably. But here I am in the real world, where I am seeing people go by in the street doing this. And it isn’t illegal. Just as I might see someone smack their child and know I think it is abusive, but know I will get nowhere ‘reporting’ it to the police because it’s not against the law.

The answer is I am doing nothing about it. I can’t fight thousands of idiots. But I can say what I think right here. Perhaps someone will be reflect on the ridiculousness of forcing a 2 year old into a mask to protect against a virus that will almost certainly do nothing to harm them.

SoVeryLost · 23/10/2020 07:16

@flaviaritt

I never once said you needed to change your opinion.

And no, you don’t want me to change it. Just word it in the way you prefer. The way that doesn’t express what I think about the issue. The way that expresses what you think instead. Just that.

Well, no.

No. I think saying someone is abusing their child (for them wearing a mask) is nasty and an attack that is unnecessary. You don’t have to have the same opinion. I’d say the same to someone who said bottle feeding a child is abuse or breast feeding is abuse, which I have. We all make choices that others don’t agree with. Learning how to express that opinion without attacking someone else is what being a well adjusted member of society is all about.

Would I put a mask on my three year old (not that I have one)? No and I hope never to be in the position where it’s even a consideration.

I’ve been told holding my child down for a blood test was abusing him and how could he ever trust me when I allowed the drs to hurt him. I cried the whole damn time I was holding him and cried again when a very good friend said I’d abused him. I know how those words sting, she would have made different choices to me but neither choice was wrong.

flaviaritt · 23/10/2020 07:17

Child abuse is not something where you can just have an opinion and agree to differ.

And yes it is. I can literally have any opinion I like, and agree to differ on any issue I like. When did people start thinking (so persistently and commonly) that they have any say on what happens inside other people’s brains? Have we all gone mad?

flaviaritt · 23/10/2020 07:18

I think saying someone is abusing their child (for them wearing a mask) is nasty and an attack that is unnecessary.

And I don’t. Think what you want, i will do the same. You appear unable to accept simple differences of opinion.

flaviaritt · 23/10/2020 07:19

Anyway, can see this is going to turn into a pile-on from the ‘can’t bear disagreement’ brigade, so I will leave you all to it.

SoVeryLost · 23/10/2020 07:22

@chinateapot thankfully we haven’t had many blood tests since, the phlebotomist took blood no problem. In A&E for suspected meningitis was the worst ever, just thinking about it makes me want to hug him and apologise. I never ever want to have to do it again but he needed the cánula in. If I had to do it again I would, it’s far worse to me to leave him with a bunch of strangers while that happens but I totally get why some can’t do it.

Angel2702 · 23/10/2020 07:23

Yes two are over 11 so have to wear masks if indoors and in communal areas at school.

My youngest is 9 and wears a mask.

My 14 yr old and 9yr old are exempt but wear a mask when they can

SoVeryLost · 23/10/2020 07:28

@flaviaritt

I think saying someone is abusing their child (for them wearing a mask) is nasty and an attack that is unnecessary.

And I don’t. Think what you want, i will do the same. You appear unable to accept simple differences of opinion.

Abuse is not a difference of opinion.

I’ve seen and reported neglected children and wish people who can would do more for them. Abuse is something that should be reported, it is not a term to be used lightly. Abuse has long standing affects, the fact you won’t countenance reporting it speaks volumes that you don’t truly believe it to be abuse but just parenting difference.

Parenting differences are just that differences. Choices people don’t agree with, having a healthy discussion is one thing labelling a perfectly reasonable parenting choice as abuse totally undermines actual abuse children face.

flaviaritt · 23/10/2020 07:30

Abuse is not a difference of opinion.

Of course it is. You think it isn’t abuse and I think it is. Our opinions literally diverge on the point. You will not convince me otherwise. You are inventing a reality for yourself where your opinion has objective legitimacy, for some reason I do not understand. But anyway, I’m off because I can see you getting yourself worked up.

Fannybawz · 23/10/2020 07:33

Mines autistic, he didn’t speak til he was 4, I
Don’t ask him to wear his unless it’s totally unavoidable. He is 9.

SoVeryLost · 23/10/2020 07:34

Maybe then you could explain how a child wearing a mask is “to treat in a harmful, injurious, or offensive way”? How is it actually harmful? What is the psychological or physical damage?

Is it abuse if the child asks to wear a mask? What is the damage being done if the child wants to wear it?

Is going to sleep with a muslin over their face different? Why?

flaviaritt · 23/10/2020 07:36

SoVeryLost

I’m not continuing this, SoVeryLost. We disagree, that is all there is to it.

Fannybawz · 23/10/2020 07:37

Are you talking to me? It took so long for my son to communicate that I won’t hinder his progress any further than The Lockdown already did!

Also: social distancing comes naturally to him!

bonbonours · 23/10/2020 07:42

My 12 and 14 year olds wear them on the train to school and in shops but not in school. I wish they would make them compulsory in school corridors though as year group"bubbles" are all squashed in there pushing past each other. My 10 year old has some but barely ever wears them as doesn't go many places just school and his sports club where he isn't required to. But he has no issues with wearing it when he needs to. We all wear masks if we go in my mum's house as trying to protect her.