Is lockdown particularly tough for an only child

[MissPoldark]

I’m wondering about the potential to allow only children to officially bubble with a friend.
I think lockdown is especially difficult for children with no brothers or sisters at home to play with.

Single adults were allowed to bubble with another household, what do we think of the idea that single children could also do this?

I absolutely appreciate that lockdown is difficult for all sorts of people in different circumstances, but this strikes me as being something not too unreasonable that could be considered.

We can’t have a never ending list of exceptions, I know that. It’s just an idea that I think would really help the mental health and continuing social development of many children.

@ineedaholidaynow

My DS(15) was quite happy

My DC was not unhappy, but has been happier now back at school. BTW the failure of any of his quite large friendship group to make contact during lockdown really brought it home that his friends were not good friends.

We have an only child. She has been fine but she does enjoy being with friends. She is quite patient and understanding so just had fun during lockdown. But I am sure she would have loved company of a child even of for a small amount of time. Would have loved to form a bubble with a friend, but noone I know was taking the situation seriously - read illegal parties, playdates with several children, just out and about mixing with several households. I wish we could find someone who was taking the covid situation seriously enough and form a bubble with their child. I could maintain distance but would be just nice to have kids playing together.

It was awful for my 14yo dd and took a huge toll on her mental health 🙁

My DC was not unhappy, but has been happier now back at school.
BTW the failure of any of his quite large friendship group to make contact during lockdown really brought it home that his friends were not good friends.

That's a shame. Did he try to make contact with any of them himself? It must have been quite isolating for teenagers without any contact with friends over the lockdown period, whether they had siblings or not.

Yes my DS14 has suffered massively just being with us since March. Schools opening were brilliant for his mental health. They need to stay open.

@Jennygentle

My only child enjoyed lockdown to a worrying extent but I realise many onlies didn’t. In theory, the friend bubbles is a nice idea.

Mine too. I would've loved it as a child as well. I would've been in my element.

My dd positively thrived. She was so happy, the return to school has been hard and full of anxiety and crying.

@AlexaShutUp

*My DC was not unhappy, but has been happier now back at school. BTW the failure of any of his quite large friendship group to make contact during lockdown really brought it home that his friends were not good friends.*

That's a shame. Did he try to make contact with any of them himself? It must have been quite isolating for teenagers without any contact with friends over the lockdown period, whether they had siblings or not.

I think sometimes school friends are like work colleagues. In that specific environment you are friends but take away the school environment and it can be hard to keep in touch. But it can still be lonely stuck at home for weeks or months without social interaction with those friends, and maybe not healthy.

I was so grateful that my two (7&9) are the same sex, overlapping interests and genuinely get along well despite all the sibling bickering along the way.

It was enough for DS1 who is introverted and has ASD. However I'm so relieved at how normally he has settled back into school and wven he was ready for more than DS2.

DS2 suffered more. DS1 can be intense and DS2 is more extroverted. By June, he was frankly depressed, and on grottier days would lie in bed staring vacantly at the ceiling. June into July, my lovely sunny, bubbly 7 year old was rude and surly because that was his way of grabbing a little control in life. And that was hard, because we couldn't let it pass but it was the sign of a suffering child and there was no escape or distraction. It did ease once things opened up in July and there was more of a summer holiday vibe.

Most people we know with families were either ultra cautious because children/ social distancing, or just drowning under the pressures of work and didn't have the head space to create chances for children to meet up.

DS1 could have managed as an only.
DS2 suffered despite his sibling.

Children should have a right to age appropriate socialising, especially as they have reduced opportunities or ability to make-do with phones/ video calls etc.

My 4yo really suffered and she had a baby sister so not an only but not another child at an appropriate age to play. As soon as we could get her back into childcare she was off. I don’t think I could do it to her again long-term. I’d be very worried about her.

DS (13) has been fine with it. He has spent a lot of time talking to his friends on Xbox. He is pretty good at entertaining himself and will come and chat, play a game or watch tv with me when he want's company. His dad visits about once a week. We don't have other family so he hasn't missed seeing them if that makes sense. I know some who are more sociable have found it it hard while schools have been shut but surely this is less of a concern if they can remain open.