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Original poster

If they put a stop households mixing...

232 replies

musicalfrog · 19/09/2020 19:40

What do those of us relying on grandparents for babysitting do? Could those in already restricted areas shed any light on this perhaps please? Thanks.

OP posts:
ShinyGreenElephant · 19/09/2020 19:41

Not allowed in the North East. Absolute joke isn't it. No idea what they expect people to do!

TheNewLook · 19/09/2020 19:42

A long shot... but could the grandparents move in with you to form a bubble? Appreciate this night not be possible. Just an idea.

Jrobhatch29 · 19/09/2020 19:42

I'm north east too and its causing huge of problems for alot of people.

Someaddedsugar · 19/09/2020 19:45

In the north east the local councillors are trying to get grandparent childcare included as an allowance for two households. I think it's currently restricted to reduce the risk to those who could potentially be older and more vulnerable.

Ellsbells12 · 19/09/2020 19:45

@Jrobhatch29

I'm north east too and its causing huge of problems for alot of people.
Sorry for you guys I am lucky my company pays for childcare but I don't know what mr whitty mr valence expect us to do as they are advising Boris
BlackLambAndGreyFalcoln · 19/09/2020 19:47

If you're in England it's a bit difficult under the current rules to use grandparents for babysitting anyway (unless you qualify to form a support bubble) due to the need to maintain social distancing between different households (including children). Hopefully support bubbles will continue under any further tightening of restrictions.

WholePlaceIsPickled · 19/09/2020 20:00

In West Midlands and my sister and MIL do our baby sitting whilst we work. Not allowed. Must be furloughed, rearrange work hours or kids go to childminder/nursery. Which is excellent because I can’t really insist my work furlough me or rearrange my work hours or afford childcare (minimum wage job)! Good luck haha!

Hoppinggreen · 19/09/2020 20:05

It’s the case in my area , luckily doesn’t affect me
Our MP is trying to get an exception for Grandparents providing childcare but so far from Tuesday it’s not allowed.
A lot of people I know have said they will be ignoring it

Bol87 · 19/09/2020 20:06

I use my family in local lockdown. I have no choice. Nurseries & childminders round me have waiting lists the size of the M1. Plus, I can’t afford extra days anyway. I have to work or I’d lose my house. I can’t work with a 6 month old & 3 year old. So there’s no other choice. Go ahead and fine me. I have no choice & I will not be made to feel bad about it.

Original poster
musicalfrog · 19/09/2020 20:08

Nightmare then 🙄 thanks for clarifying. I hadn't heard of any allowances being made but thought I'd double check.

OP posts:
Qasd · 19/09/2020 20:09

Given it takes one of the groups mixing most with out social distancing (kids at school) and mixes them with with a group containing more people who are older at a high risk of the virus allowing this would seem to encourage the spread from the young to the old that they want to avoid I cannot see it being allowed unfortunately!

MustStopSnacking28 · 19/09/2020 20:09

We have had this problem for over a month in Manchester and nothing has been done about it. I have raised it with Andy Burnham’s office and got a crap auto response so I don’t think they give a shit about it. We are just still struggling with working full time with a toddler so as not to break the rules. Been doing it for 6 months and looks like it could be another 6 months! We are on our knees. It’s killing us to be honest.

thewinkingprawn · 19/09/2020 20:10

I think many people will just ignore it tbh - what can you do if it’s the only way you can work.

Yetiyoga · 19/09/2020 20:11

Yes, @BlackLambAndGreyFalcoln is correct. Even under the current regulations, you shouldn't be using grandparents as childcare. Unless you yourself are the only adult in your house or the grandparent lives alone, therefore creating a support bubble. It seems stupid though given they are more at risk in a nursery!

cautiouscovidity · 19/09/2020 20:13

@musicalfrog

What do those of us relying on grandparents for babysitting do? Could those in already restricted areas shed any light on this perhaps please? Thanks.
Unless a single grandparent who in your family 'bubble' (in which case I guess you can continue to mix), any family you mix with should be socially distanced under current rules (in England at least). That means in most cases, grandparents aren't really able to provide childcare as the rules stand anyway as they shouldn't be closer than 1-2 metres, not sharing a car etc. which is impractical when caring for toddlers / young children.
cautiouscovidity · 19/09/2020 20:14

@BlackLambAndGreyFalcoln

If you're in England it's a bit difficult under the current rules to use grandparents for babysitting anyway (unless you qualify to form a support bubble) due to the need to maintain social distancing between different households (including children). Hopefully support bubbles will continue under any further tightening of restrictions.
Yes this exactly.
Bridecilla · 19/09/2020 20:17

I'm in the North East and for the first time we've broken the rules. Ds goes to breakfast club 2x a week and I drop and pick up one day. Grandparents do the other days.

We can't get him into breakfast club or afterschool club any of the other days, it's full.

Dp and I are both teachers - not sure what else we're meant to do but break it?

It's caused huge rows as dp is a rule follower. I cried with stress on Thursday night. We're already wrecked dealing with everything else.

Yetiyoga · 19/09/2020 20:24

@Bridecilla I don't blame you. I wish the government would actually acknowledge this. 'Schools must return' okay but what should teachers do about their own children.

Original poster
musicalfrog · 19/09/2020 20:26

I completely get the risk. I was furloughed before so it wasn't a risk i had to take. However the grandparents hated being away from the children and in the end decided it was worth breaking the restrictions because they wanted to enjoy ther children properly, with hugs etc. Their choice and much safer before schools returned. We will have to think harder this time around.

OP posts:
Someaddedsugar · 19/09/2020 20:26

@Bridecilla Flowers. There's a north east support thread set up if you need it.

Jrobhatch29 · 19/09/2020 20:27

@Bridecilla

I'm in the North East and for the first time we've broken the rules. Ds goes to breakfast club 2x a week and I drop and pick up one day. Grandparents do the other days.

We can't get him into breakfast club or afterschool club any of the other days, it's full.

Dp and I are both teachers - not sure what else we're meant to do but break it?

It's caused huge rows as dp is a rule follower. I cried with stress on Thursday night. We're already wrecked dealing with everything else.

I dont blame you. You're not alone...i am a teacher too although on maternity now. When I go back I will have no choice but to do the same if these restrictions are still in place. Many staff in my school are having to still use family too.
amusedtodeath1 · 19/09/2020 20:28

This is causing massive problems where I am (NW), lots of parents just don't have any other options. It seems it's been overlooked or ignored.

I am hoping for an announcement to try to rectify it before lockdown-ish Tuesday tbh.

Minniem2020 · 19/09/2020 20:29

I'm also in the north east and just being out and about today I've seen 3 grandparents that I know with their grandchildren. Yes against the rules but really what choice do these parents have?

SoUtterlyGroundDown · 19/09/2020 20:34

We’re not currently in local lockdown so not an issue I have (yet) but if we were we’d be screwed, as would many people where I live.
School breakfast and after school club hasn’t reopened. One nursery that offers after school care, which is full. Two childminders in the village, also both full.

fishywaters · 19/09/2020 20:35

I wonder whether you could set up a childcare contract with grandparents and pay them notional amounts under the mandatory limit for NI per week. Then it is basically paid childcare they are providing. I realise it isn’t ideal but for people on their knees with no other choice... some grandparents are relatively young and healthy and want to see their grandchildren and IMO having to ignore a toddler for months and trying to work isn’t fair on them either. No idea if it is legal but might be worth looking into