Had enough of just about all of my friends

[SofaSurfette]

It seems like pretty much every single person I know is behaving as though this virus doesn't exist anymore. Social media is full of photos of my friends hugging and even kissing. They're having baby showers with everyone's hands on the mum-to-be's bump, and handing new babies around like pass-the-parcel. (A lot of people I know have had babies this year!)

I have only been outside for fresh air since March because I have an extremely vulnerable person in my house and I just don't want them to get it, regardless of what we are allowed to do. However at the weekend I made an exception because it was my best friend's special birthday and she so badly wanted me to go for a "socially distanced drink in the garden". She knows how careful I've been. No word of a lie, I turned up to a house full of people crammed in like sardines. Loud music, people shouting, basically a house party. I dropped off her present and left.

I just really needed to get this off my chest because I feel like I've lost patience now with all these idiots. I'm sure the new rules won't make a shred of difference to the people I know, because they simply don't care. I just don't like my friends anymore, I never realised how bloody selfish they really were.

Stick to your guns OP. Ignore people who try to shame you for over-reacting, being a kill-joy or having mental-health problems. Let them catch Covid while you stay safe.

Here here @BabyLlamaZen

So you are not going to complain in a years time 'nobody wants to be near me i have no friends I am lonely' ?

@seayork2020

So you are not going to complain in a years time 'nobody wants to be near me i have no friends I am lonely' ?

They will all be dead from Covid, surely, and only the most morally pure will still be alive in the new world order.

I’m with you OP. It’s not about being morally pure but - yes, there is a moral implication here. Adhering to social distancing as well as we can will save lives.

Some people seem to give zero fucks about that and consider themselves free spirited when in fact it’s pure selfishness.

This thread shows two extreme ends of the issue. I don't think either are commendable.

I'm saddened by the number of parents on here with young children who have remained locked away from the world since March. Usually facilitated by relying on others around them for their needs.
Are these young children not being socialised at all? Not having any interaction with other children? How are they building childhood immunity to common illnesses? How is their emotional development restricted?

Of course a rammed house party isn't the aim, but neither should locking yourself indoors be celebrated.

@SmileyClare yes you are right about children. At only 6 months old I'm not too concerned about mine just now, but I do plan to start doing a bit more in the spring. Like I said, there's plenty that can be done safely/sensibly. I'm just personally choosing to be as careful as possible at the moment, because I can and because it doesn't bother me. I'm only annoyed with people who are being downright stupid and irresponsible.

Fair enough Op. I personally couldn't live like you until the spring, doing nothing not even visiting a shop for over a year would leave me very depressed.

It's worth remembering there are people living alone, people struggling with their mental health, single parents, or people who cannot afford to follow your example and they shouldn't be looked at as morally inferior somehow.

I struggle to believe that all your friends are having mad house parties and playing pass the parcel with their babies with reckless abandon. You are assuming this based on social media pictures.

I still maintain that the anger and bitterness you feel towards all your friends is misdirected and a result of you removing yourself from society for such a long time. A sort of "them and us" mentality..

The majority of the population are being sensible and socially responsible, despite what you read in the media or online.

Nothings back and white and it would be a real shame to cut off all your friends, particularly your best friend for not adhering to your perceived risk avoidance.
I think your fear is disproportionate to the the actual risk.

I don't think that someone socialising sensibly is morally inferior whatsoever. I do think that people attending house parties of 30 odd people are idiots though. You're right that I'm one extreme and the house party situation is the other, but I'm not saying that anyone somewhere in the middle of that is in the wrong.

@SofaSurfette I can understand why you were upset, you trusted that your friend was honest and keeping the gathering as low risk as possible but then it became clear that they didn't care at all.

My friends have all been very understanding that I've gone a bit further than them with the precautions I've been taking as I'm pregnant and asthmatic (like you I've just go out for exercise and appointments since the 3rd week of March) .

I think selfishly if they were posting pictures of them all over social media at parties and such then I would consider ceasing communication with them for a while, because the increasing likelihood that if I have to stay in hospital after birth means I'll be alone for most if not all that time is really starting to make me annoyed of the people that don't care anymore.

I understand needing to see some friends and family for someone's mental health but a party with no distancing especially if alcohol is involved really isn't necessary for me, however, I can see how if that person has never been in that situation where someone they loved has died because the nhs couldn't save them that they just don't compute that it could be their fault if a vulnerable loved one got ill.

People in my area are doing the thing where they pretend the guidelines are too difficult to understand so that they can do what they want.

Basically most people here did lockdown very well but then interpreted easing of rules as ‘there are no rules’ because they were bored. Anyone exhibiting sensible boundaries is treated as boring or depressed. It reminds me of peer pressure at school

**People make their own decisions about what risks to take

They do and most ignore the risks which is literally the whole point of socially distancing. I feel the same as OP. I've seen 'friends' on social media on holiday, at parties, shopping in busy places without masks on and I can't quite get over the fact that they are just flouting the rules.