Lockdown is so much harder knowing more are breaking the rules now

[hermionegrange]

I had a baby the day before lockdown started. I am so desperate to visit my mum and let her hold him and have a cup of tea with her. She's 65, for and healthy, and hasn't been out. My dad does a food shop once a week but other than that they're in their house and garden. The risk of them or is having it so low. We also only go out once a week for shopping and daily exercise where we don't pass anyone.

It's so much harder knowing other people are doing what they want

My husband won't break any rules so we are sticking to lockdown as we are meant to

Your husband sounds a fucking nightmare

Just go FFS ....

OP, be sensible. If you and your parents have followed the rules as strictly as you say then its pretty certain none of you have virus.. Just go over there and let your mum hold the baby Wash hands, wear masks etc.

Just go with the new baby, leave DH and toddler behind.

Take the baby and go and see your folks without husband or toddler, that way he'll be less bothered about the potential hugging between toddler and your mum. Simples.

Or is it not simples because your DH is likely to be awkward? In which case he sounds like a knob.

And remind your DH this is not the plague.

Just go.

If no one has been anywhere they can't pass on a virus that they don't have no matter how much kissing, licking and hugging a toddler does so the 2m rule isn't any help anyway.

Leave your toddler with your husband and visit your parents one day, 2m apart in the garden, then leave your baby in the garden and take your husband to see the toddler in the garden, 2m apart, or something.... Being silly of course, but you get the drift, of course you can take them, but if you think your toddler won't understand the social distancing (as most don't) then don't take them but do lots of Skyping with them and concentrate on visits to your parents with the baby. It'll be ok

My husband wouldn't allow it

What is going on here ?

@Vargus they do exist. OP is saying the problem is that the toddler obviously doesn't and can't understand social distancing.

don't think he would be keen on my going by myself

Woah right there 🚩

All these controlling partners are just loving lockdown, aren't they. At last they get to be utter dicks but be all smug about following (their own super strict version of) the rules

Up to you

Make him have the toddler if he's that bothered

My husband wouldn't allow it

This is the problem, not lockdown. Only leaving the house once a week for shopping and daily exercise is no longer part of the lockdown guidance.

How often does your husband look after your toddler without you there?

@NoHardSell

You are so right

My husband wouldn't allow it

There's your problem then.
Would he be OK if you were to leave the toddle with him, and you went to see your mum with just the baby?
Much easier with a baby as you can hold them yourself, they're not mobile unlike toddlers who are into everything and no concept of social distancing.
Go see her.
Perfectly legal to go see her and sit out in her garden, or to go for a walk in the park with her.
Just no going in the house.
If he still "won't allow it" you've got a bigger problem than lockdown.

It’s not other people not keeping to the rules that is your problem...it’s your husband that’s the problem here!!

Allow?
Blimey op. This is the 21st century

Your husband won't allow you to see your own mum that's probably why you're sad.

If your toddler hugs his grandparents it's not going to be the end of the world, yes it's not technically allowed but risk is low

Yeah leave your toddler with your SH and take the baby to visit your mum. Your DH can't tell you not to see your mum, one thing if it was against lockdown rules but it really isn't as long as you sit apart out of doors.

And what if you just go and leave the toddler with him?

You have a dh problem.

@NoHardSell

All these controlling partners are just loving lockdown, aren't they. At last they get to be utter dicks but be all smug about following (their own super strict version of) the rules

Up to you

Make him have the toddler if he's that bothered

Totally agree - there’s a lot of controlling men absolutely loving this 🤔

This doesn't sound like a lockdown problem, it sounds like a husband problem.

He wouldn't ALLOW it, OP?? He wouldn't ALLOW you to see your parents without him?? That's a worry.

yes why cant you just take the baby and sit in the garden

he is your problem not everyone else

Take your babies and go and see your Mum/stay there. Leave misery guts at home/forever.

He wouldn’t “allow” you?! Just get in your car and go see your parents. Be sensible with hygiene etc. You are causing yourself to be miserable. My healthy parents (aged late 50s) have seen my young kids recently, for walks and in the garden. No big deal.